oshin

hi everyone.

Well i was with my gf for four yerars and about two months ago she brokeup with me. It sort of wasnt a suprise as i have not been the same person she fell in love with 4 years ago. i didn not treat her the way i used to maybe becuase i got too comftrable with her. At the begining i tried calling her and asking her to get back with me but that just got her mad to the point where she would get pissed off if i called her or showed up at her house to see her. its been almost 3 weeks since i last talked to her or saw her and i miss her alot. I still ove her with all my heart and so does she(she told me that last time i saw her). my relationship wit her was a beatiful thing becuase we saw eachother 340 days out of the 365 and we talked EVery day without any exceptions. She is a strong girl (emotinlly ofcoarse ) as shes been throguh alot in her life. She told me that she wishes she could be with me but when she think about it logically we cannot be together becuase we are two different people. Im very confused as to what i should do , i mean we talked about marrige and all she told her parents that she wanted to marry me and be with me for the rest of her life. I know i can be the person who she fell in love with and i want to be because it makes me a better person as to who ive become in the past year. But she doesnt wanna belive me anymore becuase wed broken up b4 but it only lasted for 2 weeks , last breakups were more the less the same issues but not to this extend. she told me that we grew apart in the last couple of months and its probably cuz of my actions. everyone who i talk to or tell the news to get shocked . friends and everyone though we were happy (with the exception of last couple of months). I can not see myself without her nor with any other girl. she broguht me something that no other girl had b4 and i feel sorry for what icve done and the way i treated her. I dont know if shell ever call me again and i dont know if well be together again but i know one thing that il love this girl forever. I dont know what to do anymore i tried everything but she doesnt want to see me at all. last time i saw her she told me maybe one day we can sit and discuss this but not now . and knowing that just kills me . in a way this break up was a good thing becuase i realized alot of things , but i would hate it if i lost her forever.

thnaks for listening people
comments are welcome.

ObieX

First - there are plenty of fish in the sea.

Look! See?



Second - Don't bug her. Let her go. If she loves you as much as you think, she'll be back eventually. If she doesnt, see above. If you keep bugging her you'll only give her more reason to want to not be with you. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

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Cynthetiq

proper spelling, paragraphs, and punctuation help other people read easier.

more people able to read and understand means more poeple can comment.

for you not being able to "see yourself with someone else" well, you're going to have to since she's not with you any more. Either that you you live without for the rest of your life.

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meembo

Sorry about your breakup. I know it really does hurt, but it really does get better someday. Right now it sucks.

So let her go. Make as many days go by as possible without seeing her or talking to her. There's nothing you can say to make her feel differently, so just keep going. There aren't any shortcuts to this process, except to remove her from your daily life.

If you made serious mistakes with her, make sure that you don't make the same mistakes next time. Happiness will come back some day. Good luck!

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less I say, smarter I am

Daniel_

Breakups suck arse.

Sorry to hear about yours.

That said, when my wife and I split it destroyed me. It took me two years to put the pieces of my life back together - and then I realised that I'm a nicer, happier, saner person than I was in the 17years we were together.

I'm glad that we split, although I'm not glad how painful it was, but if we'd not split I'd not have met my new love, and I'd not be marrying her next weekend.

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And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
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paulskinback

If you think she's going to come back to you, then time will tell, and she will.

Let her do her own thing, she probably needs some space - hell you probably need some space after 4 years. I'm guessing you're in your early twenties? Theres lots of time to find a newer, fitter, better looking girl than the last one if it is the end.

I hate break ups, sorry dude.

paulskinback

oh and please check your spelling. and use paragraphs.

oshin

thanks for the input people, irronically my birthday is on Valentine's day.
so ya i turn 22. We started dating when i was 18 (she actually asked me out )




Time will definity solve alot of things on its own. But i hate waiting

Martian

Yeah, it sucks. What it basically comes down to is you have to realize that she's not coming back and move on with your life. It's a process that might take 1 month, 6 months or a year. Or more, even.

Don't rush it. You'll be past this when you are. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

A wise man once told me...

Sage wisdom that I definitely took to heart, when I was in your position.

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I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Crack

I'll second (or is it third) that break-ups do indeed suck. But they can be blessings in disguise as well, you said it yourself, you are not the person you were when you were first together. I am sure that it is the same thing for everyone, growing up changes people. I don't know anyone who stayed the same from age 18-22. I'll be willing to bet that she has changed too. Love her all you want, trust me, it takes two people to make a relationship work. Which is the same reason Jennifer Tilly won't return any of my letters.... but that is a different story.
Let her be, it's up to you when you are gonna cut your losses and move on, but if you really want to make it work (which never works btw) don't creep her out by stalking her and forcing her to make anymore rash decisions. you won't like the outcome.

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Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex.

~Halx