Quick Thinking - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Canadian Beer · 09-01-2003, 06:39 AM

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there thinks you're a fat skank.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Probably because you'd be on your knees greeting my crotch.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: That's cool, 'cause after I get done nailing you in the back of my car... I don't give a crap where you go.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: No problem, I can always withdraw onto your face

Man: Do you want to dance?
Woman: No!
Man: I think you misheard me. I said you look fat in those pants.

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: That works for me... as long as you're still warm when I do you.

Flesh · 09-01-2003, 06:50 AM

ROFL, i love these.

Regziever · 09-01-2003, 12:03 PM

Hehehe! Good ones.. Almost spraypainted the screen with my tea when I read the last one.. hehe!

mpedrummer2 · 09-01-2003, 02:45 PM

The last one was foul, uncalled for, and fucking hilarious

Shpoop · 09-01-2003, 05:11 PM

great, great stuff, my favorite was the third, but theyre all fuckin great

Cujo · 09-01-2003, 05:31 PM

Hmmmm. I always heard the 3rd to last one this way.

Man: Do you want to dance?
Woman: No!
Man: Well then I guess a blowjob is out of the question.

loganmule · 09-01-2003, 06:29 PM

I liked them all as well, but especially the "want to dance" one

HunterDevourer · 09-02-2003, 05:42 AM

Fantastic! Encore!

Glad-I-Ate-Her · 09-02-2003, 07:33 PM

Excellent!

Glad

Latch · 09-03-2003, 08:47 AM

Those were great.. well done!

Wu Lung · 09-03-2003, 10:01 AM

lol

Nice comebacks....

cchris · 09-03-2003, 05:44 PM

Funny stuff

Porkage · 09-03-2003, 05:44 PM

Couple more ones that if had lying around

Male comebacks to female comebacks to male pick up lines -

Man - Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman - Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man - Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat s*lut.

Man - Is this seat empty?
Woman - Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man - There's no need to get on your knees and suck on my c*ck just
yet, we've only just met!!!

Man - Your place or mine?
Woman - Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man - That's cool, cause after I'm done shagging you in the back of my
car, I don't give a s*hit where you go.

Man - So, what do you do for a living?
Woman - I'm a female impersonator.
Man - That explains the moustache then!

Man - How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman - Unfertilised.
Man - No problem, I'll just shoot my load up your a*rse.

Man - I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman - But would you stay there?
Man - Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is impossible to
shake off once you've been shagged.

and this is the best...........

Man - You're pretty
Woman - P*iss off.
Man - Don't interrupt, You're pretty ugly, you fat b*itch

propaganda · 09-03-2003, 06:01 PM

Damn thats hilarious.

Shpoop · 09-07-2003, 04:05 PM

yea that last one was good

present_future · 09-07-2003, 08:10 PM

That's some crazy shit.
I love it.

Booboo · 09-07-2003, 08:28 PM

Lol.. that last one in the second post was gold..

fizzledorf · 09-08-2003, 07:44 AM

those are frekkin' hilarious! love it...

microdot · 09-09-2003, 01:39 AM

I don't see how a woman could get so pissy about "you're pretty".

But none the less, good lists. Once again, you guys supply me with some good every day fodder and material.

09-01-2003, 06:39 AM	#1 (permalink)
Canadian Beer Upright Location: Toronto Ontario	Quick Thinking Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes that's why I don't go there anymore. Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there thinks you're a fat skank. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Probably because you'd be on your knees greeting my crotch. Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. Man: That's cool, 'cause after I get done nailing you in the back of my car... I don't give a crap where you go. Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized. Man: No problem, I can always withdraw onto your face Man: Do you want to dance? Woman: No! Man: I think you misheard me. I said you look fat in those pants. Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing. Man: That works for me... as long as you're still warm when I do you. __________________ All we need in life: 1) Money 2) Girls 3) Cars 4) Guns 5) Beer Funny how #1 can get you anything below it.

09-01-2003, 12:03 PM	#3 (permalink)
Regziever Sexy eh? Location: Sweden	Hehehe! Good ones.. Almost spraypainted the screen with my tea when I read the last one.. hehe! __________________ Life is shit, Death is even worse, So what's the point of killing yourself? /Ignatius Camryn Paladine

09-01-2003, 02:45 PM	#4 (permalink)
mpedrummer2 Insane	The last one was foul, uncalled for, and fucking hilarious __________________ My sig can beat up your honor student.

09-02-2003, 05:42 AM	#8 (permalink)
HunterDevourer Insane Location: Sydney - Australia	Fantastic! Encore! __________________ Viva La Muerte

09-02-2003, 07:33 PM	#9 (permalink)
Glad-I-Ate-Her Junkie Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero	Excellent! Glad __________________ I'm "Glad I Ate Her" because the payback was worth it!!

09-01-2003, 06:50 AM	#2 (permalink)
Flesh Psycho	ROFL, i love these.

09-01-2003, 05:11 PM	#5 (permalink)
Shpoop Curious Location: NJ (but just for college)	great, great stuff, my favorite was the third, but theyre all fuckin great

09-01-2003, 05:31 PM	#6 (permalink)
Cujo Crazy Location: Ontari-ari-ari-O, Canada EH!	Hmmmm. I always heard the 3rd to last one this way. Man: Do you want to dance? Woman: No! Man: Well then I guess a blowjob is out of the question.

09-01-2003, 06:29 PM	#7 (permalink)
loganmule Junkie Location: midwest	I liked them all as well, but especially the "want to dance" one

09-03-2003, 08:47 AM	#10 (permalink)
Latch In Your Dreams Location: City of Lights	Those were great.. well done!

09-03-2003, 10:01 AM	#11 (permalink)
Wu Lung Upright Location: Halifax, NS	lol Nice comebacks.... __________________ Win if you can, lose if you must....but always cheat.

09-03-2003, 05:44 PM	#12 (permalink)
cchris Junkie Location: Sydney	Funny stuff __________________ There's a fine line between participation and mockery

09-03-2003, 05:44 PM	#13 (permalink)
Porkage Upright	Couple more ones that if had lying around Male comebacks to female comebacks to male pick up lines - Man - Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman - Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Man - Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat slut. Man - Is this seat empty? Woman - Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man - There's no need to get on your knees and suck on my cck just yet, we've only just met!!! Man - Your place or mine? Woman - Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. Man - That's cool, cause after I'm done shagging you in the back of my car, I don't give a shit where you go. Man - So, what do you do for a living? Woman - I'm a female impersonator. Man - That explains the moustache then! Man - How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman - Unfertilised. Man - No problem, I'll just shoot my load up your arse. Man - I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman - But would you stay there? Man - Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is impossible to shake off once you've been shagged. and this is the best........... Man - You're pretty Woman - Piss off. Man - Don't interrupt, You're pretty ugly, you fat bitch

09-03-2003, 06:01 PM	#14 (permalink)
propaganda Psycho	Damn thats hilarious.

09-07-2003, 04:05 PM	#15 (permalink)
Shpoop Curious Location: NJ (but just for college)	yea that last one was good

09-07-2003, 08:10 PM	#16 (permalink)
present_future Take my hand Location: Everywhere, but nowhere	That's some crazy shit. I love it. __________________ The only thing I'll ever ask of you... you gotta promise not to stop when I say when.

09-07-2003, 08:28 PM	#17 (permalink)
Booboo Insane	Lol.. that last one in the second post was gold.. __________________ "Your life is yours to live, go out and live it" - Richard Rahl

09-08-2003, 07:44 AM	#18 (permalink)
fizzledorf Insane	those are frekkin' hilarious! love it...

09-09-2003, 01:39 AM	#19 (permalink)
microdot Crazy	I don't see how a woman could get so pissy about "you're pretty". But none the less, good lists. Once again, you guys supply me with some good every day fodder and material.