Rubyee

I thought it might be fun to start a thread based on the pet peeves we have with men and reasons why they do what they do.

My biggest pet peeve-

In the morning, EVERY morning, I wake up to my SO hocking up the contents of his sinuses. It is so loud! And it takes him what seems like half an hour. It is the most disgusting sound that I can think of- far worse than the sound made when vomiting. If we have guests, they can hear it. Then, if we are outside, he does it out there! People in parking lots look at us with looks of disgust on their faces. It is gross and embarassing.

Does every guy do this? Is this against manners, or something that the body does that can't be helped? Please tell me that I am not the only person that goes through this.

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maleficent

/me raises hand.
Hello I am a member of the disgusting club... I've had this cold/post nasal drip thing that I have not been able to shake.. I wake up in the morning, and after about 5 minutes int he shower -I sound like a 90 year old man... It's very sexy and very feminine let me tell you... (It's no wonder I can't get a guy)

There's not a lot that can be done to help this I don't think.. If I could stop it - I would- if I didn't - I'd probably choke to death on the mucous that accumulates.(*disgusting visual - sorry)

I'm not a smoker, but I know that smokers are really afflicted with this... part of my problem (the doctor suggested) is allergies -- dust - mold - whatever.

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Rubyee

Maleficent, as long as you don't do it in public, and it is only seasonal.

This is all the time.

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You don't know from fun.

ngdawg

I have the same problem that got worse after I had a cold last month.
My pet peeve, at least with the spouse: he doesn't shut up. The smaller the point, the longer it takes to get there. Funny thing is, he had a friend that did the same thing that he'd complain about. But every conversation,' you know so-and-so from that car show that we talked to for a while, who had the wife that....well, anyway....' And I say, no, don't remember and he'll start describing the person, etc....get ON with the point!
Oh, and constant farting.....more than even I could ever do.
Getting mad at me because my mood's less than cheery. I'm moody, deal with it.
Assuming I need help if there's a tool in my hand. I know how to ask.
He used to immediately jump on me the minute I'd say "oh, shit" while at the computer with a "now what'd you do?" But since being here and learning from the best, I now outgeek him by miles

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Rubyee

I agree completely!

You know, I think that men have it backwards. They say that women can go on and on about nothing at all. At least we don't bore the person we are talking to TO DEATH!

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snowy

The sinus thing sounds like my dad...he blows his nose in the shower every morning...it's so gross and disgusting. When I was a little girl I knew it was time to get up and get ready for school by the sound of my dad blowing his boogies against the shower wall. I feel particularly sorry for my mother, who has to clean their shower. It's awful.

My SO has a habit of popping his knuckles. I cannot stand the sound of popping knuckles. He's slowly being broken of the habit, but sometimes he forgets. I think it's sweet that he's actually trying.

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onodrim

These are all understandable pet peeves, but I know plenty of women who do the same things. People in general can be annoying, regardless of gender. Some people simply have a lack of manners, whether they are male or female. Of course the sinus thing is more of a medical issue which can't be helped, so annoying as it may be, it's not really a "bad" thing to do. But regardless, there are just as many women who have bad habits as there are men who have great ones. My roomates are all female and are the biggest slobs in the world, whereas Secret is every bit as obsessive about cleaniless than I am, at times even more so. So, I think it's far too broad of a generalization to say that we only have pet peeves with those "gross" and "uncivilized" men.

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"The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. Far better it seems to me, in our vulnerability, is to look death in the eye and to be grateful every day for the brief but magnificent opportunity that life provides"
-Carl Sagan

ngdawg

Heh. I pop my knuckles a lot, which turns into a knuckle-popping contest here
I don't understand the aversion to using a tissue....spouse uses a cloth handkerchief which is gross, but I have so many friends that blow, hack and spit wherever handy, but my females friends don't(ok, I admit, none of my friends would get invited to the White House, but still...GUYS! Find a tissue!)

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Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

Rubyee

Onodrim, no one is saying that females don't have disgusting habits. But the title of the thread is Pet Peeves with MALES. I know plenty of gross females, too.

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You don't know from fun.

onodrim

Well maybe I didn't explain myself well enough. What I'm trying to say is that there is no one type of "male," so there are no specific pet peeves which apply only to males. Not trying to pick a fight, just explaining my point.

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"The world is so exquisite with so much love and moral depth, that there is no reason to deceive ourselves with pretty stories for which there’s little good evidence. Far better it seems to me, in our vulnerability, is to look death in the eye and to be grateful every day for the brief but magnificent opportunity that life provides"
-Carl Sagan

Gilda

I remember one day with my middle schoolers. One of my classes had all of the girls gone one day, leaving about a half dozen boys, all of whom got to work quickly did their work quietly, finished early, and were chatting quietly at the end of class.

One of them commented on how everything was so much quieter it was that day, and another said it was because all the girls were gone. There was the predictable "Miss Nakamura's a girl" and the inevitable "Yeah, but she doesn't count" response, which I'm never sure how to take. Anyway, the first boy pointed out that it wasn't the girls that were the problem, it was them, the boys, who acted up when the girls are around. They debated this for a little bit then asked me why this is.

I explained that it's called presenting behavior, and it's programmed into your brain. When around the opposite sex, we tend to instinctively try to show off, even if we're not aware that that's what we're doing. For example, when a peacock spreads his feathers. This is, I speculated, why we have sports. It isn't about beating the other guy, it's about showing off your hunting prowess for the females. When there are no females around, as in class that day, no need for presenting, not need to compete for the attention of potential mates.

Ok I've lost track of my point again. Oh yeah, pet peeves with guys. The displays of gross behavior are sometimes a form of presenting behavior. Making a show of farting or belching, then commenting loudly on it, can be a way of showing how masculine they are.

Gilda

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Gilda

For some of us, that is a biggie .

Gilda

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I'm against ending blackness. I believe that everyone has a right to be black, it's a choice, and I support that.

~Steven Colbert

rlynnm

I can name a few things that make men totally UNappealing such as their tendency to showoff, make themselves seem more adept than you, their neverending pride, "I know AND can do it all (after I google it that is..)" and hell a whole slew of other things ..but sadly, I wouldn't give up the penis and the balls for anything ..but yes, men do piss me off on a very regular basis.

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little_tippler

They way they ignore you if they don't want to hear what you have to say which is sooo rude, like you're invisible. The way they dismiss you when you try to help sort out some gadget or other of those and they wave you away saying they will handle it, then leaving it because they can't, and then you go and fix it in 5 mins.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

JustJess

I don't have pet peeves with men in general... just mine!

We are attempting to institute a new rule... no leaving your (his) bags in the middle of the floor and empty them on the floor, where they just sit waiting for me to trip over them.

My major pet peeve (and it seems to not just be my guy) is how if he doesn't want to do something, he blows sunshine up my ass and tells me "but you do it so much better than I do", usually in regards to packing. Drives me batty. As it happens, he does a LOT of chores and things, it's just that phrase... my bullshit detector starts screaming.

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Eweser

Me too.

- Not putting stuff back where it came from (in the house).
- Automatically shutting down if we're having a "conversation" (read: argument)

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noodle

The Turtle.

The most horrific torture for an SO.

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Eowyn_Vala

There are the things that annoy me:

- popping his knuckles
- leaving his dirty socks all over
- complaining laundry needs done, but not doing it

I try to take these things in stride since he has tried and is succeeding in stopping other habits like leaving the toilet lid up (not the seat, we have a curious cat..), leaving the volume blaring in the car once he comes home, watching G4 when I'm around, so I can't be too picky.

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rlynnm

Yeah JustJess, I totally agree. Oh how they use flattery to their advantage, all the time, everytime. I lived with my ex for a few years and I swear, towards its downfall it seemed like I was the only one doing anything at all.. He never had me pack though, cause everytime he would impose it on me, I would pack his shit absolutely opposite of how he wanted it. He was really anal about all his stuff..and it seemed to actually worked. he never made me pack for him again.

__________________
The hardest thing is to be honest with yourself, especially if that means completely redefining the world you've come to know.

Don't look too hard, I'm right in front of you.

genuinegirly

So I have this male co-worker named Cn.
he leaves crap everywhere. Graduated cylinders left out on the bench, bottles of sample hanging out on carts taking up space for weeks... Some of the co-workers have taken it upon themselves to clean up after him. Makes me sad that he can't just pick up after himself. Do parents not teach kids how to pick up their room anymore? Oh, and I have a study partner who doesn't clean his toilet. It has developed a yellow tinge! Tempted to bring some toilet cleaner with me the next time I go over there and clean it myself.

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supersteph2747

I've given up on getting him to put the toilet seat down, I've given up on the belching and farting thing (not that it bothered me THAT much... I have 4 brothers so I'm used to it) and I've given up on telling him not to make comments on how he'd love to do Natalie Portman... He's 31 and I think he's too old to "train". Right now I'm working on getting him to get the temperature in his room below sauna level... Wish me luck!

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Atropos4

ok Not sure it's the same with all males but Alpha Phi does this sometimes as did my dad and brothers.

They will be looking for something and look in an obvious place. Sometimes a couple place and when they don't see it by just "looking" Keyword complain and ask where it is as if I'm the one that lost it. I go to right where they look and move ...lets say a book and wallah there it is. So I guess the pet peeve is when they're looking for something that just look on the surface and don't bother to moves stuff and look under or behind things ><

ooo and when I find it in the spot they half assed look they get snippy like I hid it in the first place. Why the hell would I hide a pen? haha

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little_tippler

After reading this amusing thread, I have decided to quote some of you to say that I have found that with most men, these are the things they almost all seem to do. Yes, I am stereotyping but I think sometimes, it does apply:

"
-Yeah JustJess, I totally agree. Oh how they use flattery to their advantage, all the time, everytime.

-when they're looking for something that just look on the surface and don't bother to moves stuff and look under or behind things

-I've given up on getting him to put the toilet seat down

- Automatically shutting down if we're having a "conversation" (read: argument)
/ They way they ignore you if they don't want to hear what you have to say which is sooo rude, like you're invisible.


-The way they dismiss you when you try to help sort out some gadget or other of those and they wave you away saying they will handle it, then leaving it because they can't, and then you go and fix it in 5 mins. "

Do you agree? So what I'm asking is, ok in this PC world we live in, stereotyping is not cool, but doesn't it seem odd to you that most seem to have certain characteristics in common? (Ok maybe all your male friends are an exception...lol) It seems odd to me, and also saddens me.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

sillygirl

I think I'm usually pretty lucky.
However. I HATE when he chews like a cow "chomp chomp" SO annoying and kills my appetite. Also bugs me when he sniffs and sniffs instead of BLOWING HIS DAMN NOSE! Sheesh! Then he gets upset when I hand him a tissue and say "BLOW". Heh. It's also annoying when I'm throwing up and he rubs my back. I think that's just a personal thing though, because none of my friends have agreed that it's annoying when you're puking your guts out, it's his 'fault', and he won't stop rubbing!!!

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Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken
....absence makes me miss him more...

Guinevere

So funny to read this stuff. I live with a messy guy and I just had to let go of all that--I basically lowered my standard of cleanliness (that had to be one of the easiest things I've ever done!). I keep the place clean, but it's seldom tidy. But, I just can't break him of the habit of using the fireplace mantle as his dumping ground for everything in his pockets. It's the first thing he does when he gets home--empties his pockets. So now I just wait awhile and sort through the coins and toss out everything else. Funny how he doesn't miss those brazillion golf tees and sticky notes I've tossed!

Sharon

If you are including men in general and not just SOs, then pickup lines and male strangers who think they have the right to grope you is my biggest pet peeve. I guess it comes with being a waitress, but even with all the people I encounter in my job, it's unusual to see a man come up with a really original, respectful, yet sexy approach. At the other extreme, men who are nice to you to the point of being a pain...