little_tippler

There has never been any doubt in my mind that I will never want to go to a male gynecologist.

The main reason is obvious: I would never, at any time, want to put myself in a situation where I might feel that the gynecologist was doing anything but their job.

This is not to say that I think male gynecologists do this - just that I feel it's more likely to happen with a male doctor than a female one.

There are so many crass jokes about why men become gynecologists that it's impossible to remain impervious to the idea.

Other reasons I can think of, for me, is that I'm very private and reserved, so if someone other than my SO has to see me down there, then it has to be a woman and not man. Any issues relating to that area of me that I might go to a doctor for seem so private that it makes me cringe to think of discussing that sort of problem with a man, and a stranger at that.

After all, doctors are professionally trained, but they are only human also.

A reason why I'd rather go to a woman is that then they have the same gear as me, so I think they might understand better about how things feel and work down there.

Some friends of mine say they prefer a male doctor because they are more delicate, polite, and understanding than a woman is likely to be. I find this interesting but in no way does it change my mind about this. Even though I do feel that some female gynecologists aren't very delicate, which kind of confirms that claim to some degree.

How about you, do you have a preference? If so, why?

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

PonyPotato

Why is there no option for both?

I have been to both male and female obgyns and I have no problem with or preference for either sex. If anything, I have had better luck with male gynecologists because they are more apt to listen to me talk and explain their birth control recommendations for me in medical terms rather than personal preference (I had one female obgyn refuse to prescribe me a certain birth control pill because SHE had a bad experience with it). Of course, a female obgyn is more likely to understand a type/location of pain, but I am sometimes less comfortable during my exams because their touches are TOO gentle.

My doctors have never been less than professional with me.

__________________
"Without passion man is a mere latent force and possibility, like the flint which awaits the shock of the iron before it can give forth its spark."
— Henri-Frédéric Amiel

jewels

I've tried three female gynecologists aInd found them to be a lot rougher during the exam and not even good at pretending to listen to any concerns.

I prefer a male touch and the ones I've been to listen and respond to the concerns I've had.

I'm not afraid. I'm never put to sleep or tied down. An assistant is required (insurance laws in the US) to be in the room. And I only go to doctors that have been recommended to me by friends.

__________________
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.
Mark Twain

ShaniFaye

I've been to both and prefer males over all. I had one really really good female, but she moved away and the ones i've seen since have horrible "manners" in the doctors office

question...what if you were going to a female and you found out she was a lesbian...would you still want to be seeing her?

__________________
I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!

PonyPotato

I only had an assistant in the room during my first exam. You may have an assistant/nurse present IF you request it (in my experience), but generally I don't bother.

The female obgyns I've seen have been hyper-gentle with me, but maybe my experience is abnormal. I also prefer a male touch, though one male obgyn I visited was quite rough with me. I guess "I haven't been sexually active for two years" didn't alert him to the idea that the speculum would have a super-tight fit.

__________________
"Without passion man is a mere latent force and possibility, like the flint which awaits the shock of the iron before it can give forth its spark."
— Henri-Frédéric Amiel

raeanna74

I have never been to a Gynecologist. I just go to General practictioners or Family Physicians. I like being about to see the same Dr for both my daughter and myself and he/she knows about EVERYthing that I take or how my diet is and can get the big picture.

That said, I have seen both female and male Dr's for exams 'down there'. Emotionally I'm more comfortable with a female BUT!!! in general I find that female Dr's tend to be less gentle with your sensitive parts than a male Dr. I think that the men just tend to be more gentle than necessary, just to be on the safe side, but a woman 'knows' what a females genitals can handle. I've been to several different Dr's of both genders and that difference have been true with every one of them. I have never had a male Dr make me feel uncomfortable emotionally about worrying if they are 'just' doing their job. There is always a female nurse present too to make sure they JUST do their job.

That said, a female Dr understands better how it feels when something is going wrong down there and is more sympathetic and quick to respond to infections. For example, a male Dr wanted me to come in to get an exam BEFORE he would prescribe any cleomyicin for my bacterial vaginosis while the Female called in the prescription and THEN had me come in the same day.

There's good and bad about both. I don't worry what gender I get for regular exams as much as who is more qualified. I find that most clinics have their Dr's and their credentials posted on a clinic website and I can peruse and pick the more qualified. I also talk to others to find out who has the best bedside manner.

__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

ItWasMe

I voted 'been to male but prefer female obgyn.' But only slightly, and really only because they possess the same physical parts that I have, and probably know what it feels like for females to have bladder/yeast infections, cramping, etc.

Now that I think about it, I do prefer male. In my experience, they are a quite a bit more gentle with their touch especially that dreaded pap. When they switched from cotton tip swabs to small brushes, I saw a big difference in bedside manner male vs. female. Males are also more likely warm up their hands/instruments, less likely to jab, and are more sympathetic to pain or discomfort regarding symptoms or treatment. I almost asked a female NP once if I'd stolen her boyfriend in high school or something. I think she was having a bad day.

The exception is older men who are almost ready to retire. Not fond of their tough-old-bird manners, at all.

__________________
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .


"Ok, no more truth-or-dare until somebody returns my underwear" ~ George Lopez

I bake cookies just so I can lick the bowl. ~ ItWasMe

abaya

I didn't vote because there was no option for me: No preference, as long as the doc knows what he/she is doing, then I don't really care.

I have seen both male and females, and in the US at least... if the man is doing an exam, there is always a female nurse present (mostly as a form of insurance in case someone accuses the man of doing something wrong, etc). So I guess I have never really felt like it makes a difference.

My very first gyno exam was by a male, however... when I was 18 and very much a virgin (had not even masturbated)--so that was a little bit stressful, but more because of it being my "first time" than because the doc was a male.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran

snowy

I've never had an exam done by an OBGYN; they've always been done by either my former GP (a female) or a nurse practitioner that specialized in family planning, though my last annual was done by a PA who specialized in family planning. I've always had a woman perform the exam, and have never had a bad experience. I did learn the lesson young, though, that some female doctors/practitioners just don't know where their patients are coming from on certain issues. My doctor when I was 12-13 gave me naproxen for menstrual cramps, because she had never had cramps and didn't know what kind of pain I was in (I was missing school at least once a month due to the pain). Needless to say, the naproxen didn't do shit. With my next doctor, I explained what had happened and that the pain was bad enough to warrant something stronger; she prescribed appropriately, and put me on birth control too. But it's like going for a haircut; if you don't speak up, you might not like what you get.

__________________
If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

*Nikki*

A prefer female.

annie1

I have not ever had a male gyno, only female. I prefer this because I am pretty reserved about these kinds of things and I am more comfortable with a woman dr.

Ayashe

I honestly don't care. There are good doctors and bad doctors of every gender, and I have had those experiences with both. I think gender has little to do with getting a good exam with a qualified health care provider.

What I would recommend for everyone would be to stick with what you are comfortable with. If male providers make you less comfortable then you should be seeking a female. Whatever gets you checked out when you need to be is most important. If you are avoiding a situation because it makes you uncomfortable, you should do whatever you need to in changing it.

little_tippler

Point taken, the option is there now. Did not occurr to me at the time.

I also changed the poll wording to include all doctors, because that's the point, and not to distinguish between types of doctors, but to distinguish between preference to be seen by a male or a female doctor.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

noodle

I've never been to a male gynecologist.
Nor do I really care to because I've had some pretty complex issues and when they're sticking a giant electric freezing wand on my cervix, I want someone who has the potential to know what that feels like. Or that has gone through the hormonal effects of bc.
I've had numerous GPs that were male that completely brushed off some of my concerns that were related to "female issues".
I've done a lot of research before going to any of the GYNs I've chosen because of the complex nature of my weird body at times.
I've been lucky to find empathetic, skilled and personable physicians for the past 18 years. And they've all been women.
Actually, after the last jerk-off that argued with me about an antibiotic that had horrible side effect potential and would knock my BC effectiveness down with a quickness, I'm looking at changing my PCP to a competent, intelligent female, too.
In my experience, it's just been a better... well, experience... with female physicians.

__________________

ngdawg

My fertility doctors and obstetrician were male, but my primary now is female and I love her. If she ever retires, I'll be heartbroken.
I prefer females as gynos-that "been there, done that" that I have with this one just makes it more relaxing.

girldetective

When I go to any doctor I expect them to be professional and to know their stuff whether it is a man or a woman. I have no preference. I look for someone who I understand and who understands me, someone I can communicate easily with, and someone with whom there is a mutual respect.

I have been seeing my nurse practitioner for 20+ years and I can often do business over the phone, but she doesnt let me get away with too much time passed between visits, no longer than a year. Its a perfect balance. We have humor and comraderie between us, and at my annual exam Im asked to book a little extra time to catch up on each other's lives in full rather than just in passing. This relationship is valuable to me.

What sold me on her in the beginning was when she excused herself from the office and came back with a text book. We looked things up together to arrive at a diagnosis.

__________________
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons...be cheerful; strive for happiness - Desiderata

*monique*

I have only gone to one female gyno, all the rest have been males. I honestly could care less about male/female. I hate the entire process, doesn't matter gender of doctor.
I rely more on my "connection" to determine if I have the right doctor, any doctor. If we cannot communicate and work on issues/concerns together, then we have a problem!

Grasshopper Green

I've never been to a gynecologist, just family practioners and obstetricians. I've had both male and females for both, and I far prefer women to men. My family doctor right now is a wonderful lady and if we end up moving soon, leaving her behind will be my only regret.

__________________
"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"

Formerly Medusa

RangerJoe

I prefer male doctors in general, not just as an OBGYN. I've always felt more comfortable around males, even if they are looking at my sensitive parts. I've had a couple of doctors that I wouldn't let give me an exam because I didn't feel comfortable, so I would switch doctors. I've moved around a lot, so I have mastered knowing what I feel is right for me in a doctor.

That's not to say that I would NEVER go to a female. I just haven't found one that I've been comfortable enough around to keep as my doctor.




A little off subject, but when I was 16 and getting my very first pap smear/OBGYN checkup (I had just found out I was pregnant), I had an Indian female doctor. Now, mind you, I had never had a pap smear and I had no clue what was involved in getting my first pregnancy exam. So, there I am, laying on this cold table, my best friend right beside me, legs spread open on the stir ups. The doctor does the heart beat, does the measurements, and then does the pap smear. I relax, thinking I'm about done.

Next thing I know, there's a finger up my ass and I about went through the wall.

"Oh!" said the doctor. "Finger up the rectum!"

Needless to say, I never went back to her. (;

Meditrina

When I was pregnant with each of my children the ob/gyn office I went to had many doctors, both male and female. As a non high-risk pregnancy, I saw a different doctor at each visit. This gave me the opportunity to determine which doctor was best for me for non-pregnancy related visits. I chose a female because she understood my PMDD better than the male doctor did. The male doctor dismissed my feelings as if they were not important, or not true. The female asked better questions about my depression and was then able to diagnose my PMS as PMDD. I feel much more comfortable with her now. Which reminds me, I need to call for an appointment.

__________________
"Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles." ~Alex Karras

redjello

I would not go to a traditional doctor for ob-gyn, but a midwife: no stirrups, no gown or cold table or bright lights, no chaperone, and the exam can be performed at home on the bed.

Better yet, I look forward to the do-it-yourself pap smear coming out in the next few years. One type is already being used in Africa. It will probably be suppressed by traditional medicine in the US because doctors will lose business to the do-it-yourselfers.

Plus there is the AMAS blood test (Anti-Malignin Antibody Screening) available from alternative health providers. This provides the early detection of any cancer without the humiliating pelvic and breast exam. Only downside is that it costs $500. Some insurances may help cover it, though. With a spare $500, that's the route I would go first before any ob-gyn exam.

Falconclaw240

Yes actualy, it has never been a big problem to me that men are suppost to be attracted to women, but more along the lines of the fact that Telling my concerns to female Gynos has always been Akin to talking to my mom
By the same aspect, if I found out my male gyno was gay, i'd have the same ammount of adversion to looking him in the eye and asking why this discharge smells funny as any straight man would make me feel.

surferlove007

I've been to both male and female. I was surprised with the male visit because when I was going for BC at tech my first time the doctor said I HAD to have an exam before they gave me the prescription...sneaky bastards! To be honest he was the most gentle doctor I've ever had. Everyone else has been female..some have been terrible...others have been just fine. My colposcopy experience totally scarred me. I just HATE going in for an annual. I hate it with a passion. I wish James could just do it. I'm due for mine in october..I recently just got off birth control a first months ago and James and I are discussing other options like an IUD. So again..gotta face the dragon.

lostgirl

I have had both male and female. I prefer female for the same reason as the OP.

One time I had a male gyno that made me feel very uncomfortable. He was very creepy, and made me feel like he was enjoying his job a little too much.

I go out of my way to get a female since that happened.

stellabella1978

I agree. The two female gynecologists I have had did not listen to my concerns at all, and they were rough.

SabrinaFair

I've had my annual done by four different people: 2 men, 2 women. In my experience, women just have a better bedside manner...I think men feel obligated to make conversation. Halfway through an exam from a male gyno, he let it slip that he's a Republican. As a yellow dog Democrat, I wanted to scream, "Get out of there!"

I've also had a male GYN get kind of judgmental about my sex life....but I don't think that was gender-related, I just think it was that particular doctor.

__________________
"With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."
-Desiderata

slightlyaskew

I guess I fall into a 6th category: Have never had a female doctor so not sure WHICH I would prefer.

In the area where I live, there are no female OB/GYNs save one - who doesn't take new patients.

So, I can make no comparison.

__________________
sa

A day without sunshine is like night.

KarrB

I like a female best. But really it doesn't matter if the guy is nice and tuned in....

Tiny Dancer

I have never been to a male doc but if I needed to I would, but I like my Kim she is supper nice sensitive and caring. Oh, and i can ask anything and everything.

settie

Ditto, same here
Only ever had a male doctor, so i don't know.

minamu

Well, I've had bad experiences with male gynecologists, so that has colored my perceptions, probably, but on the other hand, why should a male be able to relate to what a gynecological exam feels like? In my experience, most of the males have not been gentle and have hurt me more, so I opted for females. I have really never had a bad experience with a female; they are usually super sensitive, warm up the tools before inserting, insert them slowly, ask how I'm doing, etc. After 2 or 3 bad experiences with males, I don't go to them any more. Also, I started to wonder exactly WHY a male would want to be a gynecologist. Do they have some weird obsession? Finally, when President Bush said that thing about gynecologists not being able to practice their "love," that pretty much made me want to vomit and feel like something may well be going on with males who are gynecologists. I figure either they find women mysterious and want to know everything, or they are freaky, and either way is not good. Sorry, I just can no longer get past the creep factor. And, I think there are some that just like knowing more about a woman's body than the average woman. More of the paternalistic control freak kind of thing. No thanks. I'm sure it's possible to get the aberrant sadistic female gyno as well, but I think it would indeed be an aberration.

pakipilot

As long as he/she is competent and has good rapport with me I don't care which one I go to. currently I have a male and he is just super.

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Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.