Women's Word Dictionary - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

GingerRoot · 06-24-2007, 11:03 AM

Quote:

Nine words used by Women......

1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4. Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5. Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.

8 . Whatever : Is a women's way of saying F@!K YOU!

9. Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to #3.

As I was reading this and thinking about myself I found much of it to be true to me. Do the rest of you also find this to be spot-on?

I can't help but wonder why we communicate this way. Is it our culture? Why don't we say 'Fuck You' for example? Is it because have had negative experiances with the use of the word? Is it because we have been conditioned to be more polite and accepting? How would a man react if you said 'Fuck You' at a time you would normally say whatever? Are we more evolved or is it a sign of submission? Maybe both?

I look forward to reading your thoughts on this!!!

Thanks,
GingerRoot

StellaLuna · 06-24-2007, 12:43 PM

Five minutes is six minutes.

That's the one I still find myself guilty of... my SO's are really into this whole "communication" thing.

(And thanks, guys.) If I'm "fine"... I really mean that. I am fine, doing okay, stop asking and don't read more into it because I am seriously alright and running on an even keel. Keep asking and I'll get pissed. If I'm not doing well at that moment I'll tell you that I'll be okay soon.

I think as women we are conditioned to just deal with it, to be sweet and kind and not argue anything. It's a holdover from the good ol' days, I suppose. Fuck that. I'd rather hash out the problems and deal with the dirt than hold onto them because I won't say anything!

Im_not_bitter · 06-24-2007, 01:03 PM

Hmm isnt this just some form of mind games? I dont think any form of mind games are ever good when it comes to relationships.

I'm very naive and I take things in a literal sense most of the time. And once this girl was like "fine, if you want to go just go then". If i were to read this at that moment i would sense double trouble right there. But nope didnt pick up on it, I went. I think if it bug her enough she would talk about it, but noooo I have to figure it out?

Here's a list courtesy of HBI: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/nicevshb.shtml

And I would perfer the balant truth rather than niceness.

hunnychile · 06-24-2007, 02:42 PM

Yeah, this glossary is 100% true, I have lived all these responses and then some! Maybe one day - guys will "get it'. Otherwise, Thank Gawd for our girlfriends!

noodlebee · 06-24-2007, 04:26 PM

The only thing that is true for me is 5, but I use it on other people, not exclusively my boyfriend. For things that I speak, I try to be as clear as possible because I used to have problems telling things properly and always stutter when I was younger. Now it it has become a habit to always tell things clearly.

It is not really "culture", but I might think of the wrong word. I make a risk to call it "stereotype". The reason why I say this is because some of my international friends will say the things in the website Im_not_bitter posted, and mean the things written beside it. I cannot see a pattern with different countries. The pattern that I see is that those friends are usually more feminine. Some are stereotypically feminine and like makeup and pretty clothes. But other have a more subtle femininity where they don't like to make themselves pretty but still enjoy talking about attractive men and gossip.

Beyond_Borders · 06-24-2007, 04:49 PM

Yup, right spot on indeed. *shakes head* Women.. We are a difficult breed

GingerRoot · 06-28-2007, 03:31 PM

I can usually be clear but when I am extremely upset that is when I use these words. I have trouble expressing my negative emotions, especially with lovers and often I'll get extremely silent.

I have seen men act differently and point out what they feel their female lover has done to wrong them... But I find explosions of rage uncomfortable and I know that when I say howI feel, these often follow.

It is definatly something I want to change but I do not know how. I like to think of myself as fairly femminist but when I read an article like this I notice that in some ways I still submit to men.

Any ideas ladies?

ngdawg · 06-28-2007, 06:57 PM

Most are spot on. I don't 'loud sigh', though, I roll my eyes.
"Nothing" means, to me, I don't want to discuss it because I can't articulate the rotten mood I'm currently in, so back off.
"That's ok" really means 'that's ok'. We all make mistakes. Long as the mistake didn't put me into the hospital, no harm done.

One of my pet peeves...ok, to quote Mal, 'pyschotic fucking hatreds'...are women who proclaim that their men should 'know' what they mean when they say something so vague as 'whatever' or know what they want without asking. They're not mindreaders.
Reminds me of the joke: "For Sale, 2006 Harley. Must Sell. Apparently, 'Do whatever the fuck you want' was not meant to be taken literally'. Make Offer."

abaya · 06-29-2007, 01:34 AM

These kinds of behaviors are what give women a bad name. I think they're all pretty horrible demonstrations of passive-aggressive, unhelpful communication that doesn't get a relationship or discussion anywhere. I hope the next few generations of women breed this out of themselves, because it's really just not a good way of operating, period.

Now, I will admit that when I say 15 minutes, I mean 25. My husband and I are learning this. However, instead of saying all of the above invectives, my technique (also incredibly unhelpful) is to say nothing at all. My silence usually says all of the above, and at some point my husband picks up on it and calls my passive-aggressive bullshit. That's one I'm still working on.

Direct, assertive communication, people!!

maleficent · 06-29-2007, 05:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ngdawg

One of my pet peeves...ok, to quote Mal, 'pyschotic fucking hatreds'...are women who proclaim that their men should 'know' what they mean when they say something so vague as 'whatever' or know what they want without asking. They're not mindreaders.

I actually borrowed the fucking psychotic hatreds from George Carlin

and I totally agree with the NG

Drives me batshit crazy - yeah I know, pretty short trip for me - when people of a certain gender start whining that the person of theo ther gender didn't do something when they should just KNOW it was important -How are people supposed to know if you don't tell them first... it's okto be pissed on the 5th time but not the first

Whatever I've been using lately but only becuase I know it pisses people off

and I really don't care enough to go into details as to why -I'm just maybe looking for a fight

Shoowop · 07-02-2007, 04:55 AM

Absolutely and 100% true all of these. But I usually say "You're an ass." as opposed to "Fuck you" I am definately passing this along to my girlfriends.

06-24-2007, 12:43 PM	#2 (permalink)
StellaLuna Psycho Location: hiding behind wings	Five minutes is six minutes. That's the one I still find myself guilty of... my SO's are really into this whole "communication" thing. (And thanks, guys.) If I'm "fine"... I really mean that. I am fine, doing okay, stop asking and don't read more into it because I am seriously alright and running on an even keel. Keep asking and I'll get pissed. If I'm not doing well at that moment I'll tell you that I'll be okay soon. I think as women we are conditioned to just deal with it, to be sweet and kind and not argue anything. It's a holdover from the good ol' days, I suppose. Fuck that. I'd rather hash out the problems and deal with the dirt than hold onto them because I won't say anything! __________________ Screw tradition!

06-24-2007, 01:03 PM	#3 (permalink)
Im_not_bitter Upright	Hmm isnt this just some form of mind games? I dont think any form of mind games are ever good when it comes to relationships. I'm very naive and I take things in a literal sense most of the time. And once this girl was like "fine, if you want to go just go then". If i were to read this at that moment i would sense double trouble right there. But nope didnt pick up on it, I went. I think if it bug her enough she would talk about it, but noooo I have to figure it out? Here's a list courtesy of HBI: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/nicevshb.shtml And I would perfer the balant truth rather than niceness. __________________ Just because it's called common sense, doesn't mean it's a common trait

06-24-2007, 02:42 PM	#4 (permalink)
hunnychile Alien Anthropologist Location: Between Boredom and Nirvana	Yeah, this glossary is 100% true, I have lived all these responses and then some! Maybe one day - guys will "get it'. Otherwise, Thank Gawd for our girlfriends! __________________ "I need compassion, understanding and chocolate." - NJB

06-24-2007, 04:49 PM	#6 (permalink)
Beyond_Borders Tilted Location: Canada	Yup, right spot on indeed. shakes head Women.. We are a difficult breed __________________ She's had a thrill, a shot to slam, enough to start a riot. Everybody wants a piece, but only you're invited

06-28-2007, 06:57 PM	#8 (permalink)
ngdawg peekaboo Location: on the back, bitch	Most are spot on. I don't 'loud sigh', though, I roll my eyes. "Nothing" means, to me, I don't want to discuss it because I can't articulate the rotten mood I'm currently in, so back off. "That's ok" really means 'that's ok'. We all make mistakes. Long as the mistake didn't put me into the hospital, no harm done. One of my pet peeves...ok, to quote Mal, 'pyschotic fucking hatreds'...are women who proclaim that their men should 'know' what they mean when they say something so vague as 'whatever' or know what they want without asking. They're not mindreaders. Reminds me of the joke: "For Sale, 2006 Harley. Must Sell. Apparently, 'Do whatever the fuck you want' was not meant to be taken literally'. Make Offer." __________________ Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

06-24-2007, 04:26 PM	#5 (permalink)
noodlebee Crazy Location: Canada	The only thing that is true for me is 5, but I use it on other people, not exclusively my boyfriend. For things that I speak, I try to be as clear as possible because I used to have problems telling things properly and always stutter when I was younger. Now it it has become a habit to always tell things clearly. It is not really "culture", but I might think of the wrong word. I make a risk to call it "stereotype". The reason why I say this is because some of my international friends will say the things in the website Im_not_bitter posted, and mean the things written beside it. I cannot see a pattern with different countries. The pattern that I see is that those friends are usually more feminine. Some are stereotypically feminine and like makeup and pretty clothes. But other have a more subtle femininity where they don't like to make themselves pretty but still enjoy talking about attractive men and gossip.

06-28-2007, 03:31 PM	#7 (permalink)
GingerRoot Upright Location: Canadian	I can usually be clear but when I am extremely upset that is when I use these words. I have trouble expressing my negative emotions, especially with lovers and often I'll get extremely silent. I have seen men act differently and point out what they feel their female lover has done to wrong them... But I find explosions of rage uncomfortable and I know that when I say howI feel, these often follow. It is definatly something I want to change but I do not know how. I like to think of myself as fairly femminist but when I read an article like this I notice that in some ways I still submit to men. Any ideas ladies?

06-29-2007, 01:34 AM	#9 (permalink)
abaya Location: Iceland	These kinds of behaviors are what give women a bad name. I think they're all pretty horrible demonstrations of passive-aggressive, unhelpful communication that doesn't get a relationship or discussion anywhere. I hope the next few generations of women breed this out of themselves, because it's really just not a good way of operating, period. Now, I will admit that when I say 15 minutes, I mean 25. My husband and I are learning this. However, instead of saying all of the above invectives, my technique (also incredibly unhelpful) is to say nothing at all. My silence usually says all of the above, and at some point my husband picks up on it and calls my passive-aggressive bullshit. That's one I'm still working on. Direct, assertive communication, people!! __________________ And think not you can direct the course of Love; for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. --Khalil Gibran

07-02-2007, 04:55 AM	#11 (permalink)
Shoowop Upright Location: My roots are in Michigan, but my heart is across the pond.	Absolutely and 100% true all of these. But I usually say "You're an ass." as opposed to "Fuck you" I am definately passing this along to my girlfriends. __________________ "They say it is better to be poor and happy than rich and miserable, but how about a compromise like moderately rich and just moody?"