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Old 07-01-2005, 06:42 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Fireworks Laws as a Freedom Gauge

I personally have this insane theory that your state's fireworks laws give a good indication of how much you lean towards being communist bastards.

For example: I love Ohio's law. Check this: Sparklers, trick noisemakers & novelties are exempt under Ohio law. Other consumer fireworks may be sold to Ohio residents upon execution of a form agreeing to take the items out to the state within 48 hours, or to out-of state residents upon execution of a form agreeing to take the items out the state within 72 hours.

That's like saying,
"You're going to take these fireworks out of the state within 48 hours, right?"
"Sure, I promise they will not be in the great state of Ohio within 48 hours. Promise. Sure, I'll sign that."

I love that.

Another: age of purchase: (Tennesee) 10 years. w00t for Tennesee.
Nothing says, "I'm an American" like a bunch of 10 year olds armed with explosives.

Massachusetss, the land of the "free," all fireworks, of any kind, are PROHIBITED.
Fucking commies.

Fucked in AZ also. What? People will set the sand on fire?
Commies also.

DC is so complicated there's a 50% chance whatever you have is illegal depending on how you look at it. Imagine that. DC. Having an overly complex law. What are the odds?

I LOVE TEXAS.
Those fuckers are like, "buy anything you want, except for military ordiance, and even that's okay if you're over 18" "Set off napalm, we don't care."
No, not really. Texas does prohibit "small rockets (less than 4 gms propellant, and casings less than ?” x 3 ½” overall length."
I read that as meaning:
"Don't buy little rockets you pussy, get this big 10 footer over here!"

Don't even bother reading Utah's. I think they're commies, but I'm not sure. They're awfully specific.

Nebraska has the right idea: " Samples for all fireworks must be submitted to Fire Marshal prior to sale for separate test shoot examination."
You know that's the best job. Picture the Fire Marshal:
"Yup, I'm gonna have to spend all day setting off, I mean "test shooting and examining" this giant buttload of free fireworks. Gotta protect the citizenry, you know?"

These damn east coast states. Commies. Delaware:
"No consumer fireworks are permitted in Delaware.
All consumer fireworks are prohibited Delaware."

Well shit. They just blew their tourist draw. Wait. Delaware had no tourist draw. Never mind.

How communist is your state? I found a good listing of laws
right here.
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Old 07-01-2005, 06:56 AM   #2 (permalink)
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New jersey:
CONSUMER FIREWORKS
Specifically Permitted None
Specifically Prohibited Torpedoes, firecrackers, fireworks containing yellow or white phosphorus or mercury, sparklers, fireworks containing an ammonium salt, and a chlorate.

~~~~~~~~~~~
i personally have no problem with the ban on them - I just wish it was enforced as I've listened to people blow off firecrackers (and not the pretty ones) for the past few weeks. A few years back, when I lived on Staten island, also prohibited there, the people across the street, a fireman actually (with a vicious dog) and three pre teen sons, the kids were left unsupervised all day, and for weeks on end would blow off firecrackers, nothign was done... (I called the police more than once because it was annoying and they were too young) Then one day the kids decided that putting a whole bunch into a metal trash can and set them off would be fun... It created a huge bang, followed by a lot of screaming as one of the boys blew off a few fingers... Stupid parents, stupid kids, unnecessary injury.

Leave fireworks to the professionals... The Gruccis put on a good show, watch them
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:01 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Kentucky is great, all of the fun stuff is illegal, but we can go to TN, OH, or IN to get the good ones we want and we are taking them out of state legitimately.
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:04 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Considering the number of fires that were started on Victoria Day this year in Toronto due to the incorrect use of fireworks I don't have a problem with putting certain restrictions on the sale of fireworks.
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Old 07-01-2005, 08:16 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Colorado pretty much only allows pretty weak stuff like sparklers, but right across the state line in Wyoming they have a ton of fireworks shops that let you buy the good stuff and bring it back down.
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Old 07-01-2005, 08:19 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Gotta love Ohio, you can tell them you are taking them to ANY state sign the waiver and go (it's a high misdemeanor/low felony I believe to sign and then get caught in Ohio seeting them off) . Yet, I believe it is illegal to carry fireworks across statelines (I maybe wrong) AND I can say I am taking them to Delaware where they are totally illegal.

Although, in all honesty when I do buy I tell them N. Carolina is my destination. Where their law is:
Quote:
"Specifically Prohibited Explosive or aerial fireworks, roman candles, and rockets or similar devices."
So in essence Ohio says: fuck other states laws as long as you don't set them off here.....

Ohio does have massive fines if caught and prosecuted. I have never been but a friend lit some bottle rockets and loud stuff off in Mansfield at 3 AM and his neighbors called the cops. All they did was confiscate them and cite him for public nuisance.
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Old 07-01-2005, 09:46 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Washington prohibits all of the usual suspects, but you can buy all of that and more on the Indian Reservations. Since there is little or no enforcement, the 4th of July is three months long.
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Old 07-01-2005, 09:55 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Hell with the law in Colorado, my neighbors would string me up if I lit any fireworks at my house. Comes with living in a National Forest.
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Old 07-01-2005, 10:05 AM   #9 (permalink)
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No fireworks = communist? Someone took their propaganda pills today.

Quote:
Fucked in AZ also. What? People will set the sand on fire?
Commies also.
There is sand in Arizona? Maybe in Yuma, other than that the only sand you see here is on the golf courses. It's hot and dry as fuck in the summertime here fire hazards have something to do with the restrictions. Right now, around Phoenix, there are a bunch of wildfires burning. One is up to 200,000 acres and growing. It's 40 miles away and I can smell it when I go to work in the morning.

Although it would be fun to have them, kids don't need to play with explosives.
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Old 07-01-2005, 10:22 AM   #10 (permalink)
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California - Firecrackers, skyrockets, rockets, roman candles, chasers, sparklers over 10”or ¼ diameter, surprise items, friction items, torpedoes, items resembling food, fireworks containing arsenic, phosphorus, thiocyanates magnesium (magnesium alloys permitted), mercury salts, picrates or picric acid, gallates or gallic acid, chlorates, (except those of alkali or earth metals), boron, titanium (except larger than 100 mesh), zirconium, gunpowder, and fireworks kits.



basically in california we have to have things that sit on the ground and flash and sparkle...
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Old 07-01-2005, 10:32 AM   #11 (permalink)
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I'm not sure if there's a communist correlation. Probably more of a population density one. You know, for safety. For the record, I have been hit in the head by a bottle rocket in the "communist" state of Massachusetts. Damn commies.
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Old 07-01-2005, 04:26 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Here in Utah....where we are too confusing to be commies , I think it's more of a safety thing than anything else. It can be really dry here and fires could start easily, so basically anything that shoots in the air is prohibited, plus those damn loud firecrackers. Sparklers, snaps, fountains, and such are ok here.
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Old 07-01-2005, 06:59 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Here in PA we are limited to things that "sparkle" and never leave the ground.

Also as a PA resident you cannot purchase ANYTHING illegal by law period. Most firework places here have 2 rooms, one for residents one for everyone else.

Thats why I goto Ohio to purchase my stuff and then bring it here.

22 Years straight so far, neighbors dont care, so its all for fun.
(even better last year and this year, a paintball field/shop opened up and they do insane amounts of fireworks, makes my stuff look like nothing)
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:26 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphaba
Washington prohibits all of the usual suspects, but you can buy all of that and more on the Indian Reservations. Since there is little or no enforcement, the 4th of July is three months long.
Well, Washington DOES allow Roman candles, fountains that shoot balls of flame, etc. None of those things are allowed under Oregon law--in Oregon fireworks are only allowed to smoke, produce fire, and do not explode/fly/etc. Everyone in the Portland area drives up to Washington to buy fireworks there--I swear Blackjack Fireworks in Vancouver makes all their money off of Oregonians, as Washingtonians are savvy enough to get their fireworks from the Indians.

I personally love fireworks, so I'm heading out to the reservation tomorrow
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Old 07-01-2005, 07:27 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Washington prohibits all of the usual suspects, but you can buy all of that and more on the Indian Reservations. Since there is little or no enforcement, the 4th of July is three months long.
except for m80's and above unless you know the right people, (which i dont anymore
)
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Old 07-01-2005, 08:15 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Yep, I was pissed off about the ban on small bottle-rockets for a good while, but then I said, "Eh, fuck it!", and got a bigger bottle and rockets.

Thanks for the laugh, billege.
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Old 07-01-2005, 08:15 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I definitely agree on your theory being "insane"

Yes, California may have a 'pseudo-socialist' reputation but that has nothing to do with the fireworks laws. I would say about 50% of the cities that are totally urbanized with little to no adjacent open land have legalized fireworks. If a city is in or near the hills, they are likely to ban all fireworks. Remember it doesn't rain in California from about June to October so July 4th means it is very dry and there is a lot of tinder dry brush to burn. No matter how careful you are, an errant ember can easily ignite this brush.
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Old 07-02-2005, 01:00 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Fireworks are fun, sure, but also dangerous. 10 years old is much too young to be setting off any kind of explosive. They're legally for sale in my city/county for four days (1st-4th), and Grace (my wife, a Paramedic) is run ragged those four days.

The biggest offenders are firecrackers going off in people's hands. She told me last year that it isn't that people light the firecracker, which then goes off prematurely, though that does happen, but people will light the fuse, then hold the firecracker in their hands, waiting for the furse to run short, then throw it in the air, trying to time it so that it explodes in the air.

The other biggie is rockets/roman candles that are set off while someone is holding them. Roman candles can backfire, burning the person holding it quite badly. She, or one of the other crews, gets one or two of those a year. A year before she started with her current crew, a man lost an eye to a backfiring roman candle.

Go watch the professional skyworks put on locally. They're much safer, and you get plenty of pretty colored explosions and big booms.

I have no problem whatsoever with any fireworks restrictions.
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Old 07-02-2005, 03:11 PM   #19 (permalink)
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No fireworks = communist = me being absurdly silly/sarcastic in the early morning.

You're not actually commie's, unless of course you are actually commies, in which case you are. But, you're not by default re: fireworks, unless you are re: membership in the communist party. Okay? Right.

My post was supposed to be on it's face absurd, especially throwing out what I did, and more to the point HOW I did, comments about various states laws.

No one's being overly serious on THIS message board...
Thank god at least one of you got a laugh.
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Last edited by billege; 07-02-2005 at 03:14 PM..
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Old 07-02-2005, 03:25 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by onesnowyowl
Well, Washington DOES allow Roman candles, fountains that shoot balls of flame, etc. None of those things are allowed under Oregon law--in Oregon fireworks are only allowed to smoke, produce fire, and do not explode/fly/etc. Everyone in the Portland area drives up to Washington to buy fireworks there--I swear Blackjack Fireworks in Vancouver makes all their money off of Oregonians, as Washingtonians are savvy enough to get their fireworks from the Indians.

I personally love fireworks, so I'm heading out to the reservation tomorrow
"Specifically Prohibited: Firecrackers, skyrockets, salutes, chasers, and bottle rockets."

I think, but I'm not certain, that "salutes" are roman candles. I have no idea what a "chaser" is.

Have a great time.
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:07 PM   #21 (permalink)
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/me can't wait until one of the neighborhood kids gets his/her arm blown off with one of those things...
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:13 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by uncle phil
/me can't wait until one of the neighborhood kids gets his/her arm blown off with one of those things...
naw, that makes for an awful lot of screaming...
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:17 PM   #23 (permalink)
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billege, I found your post funny....besides, commies are so 1980's....they aren't a threat anymore
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:36 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by uncle phil
/me can't wait until one of the neighborhood kids gets his/her arm blown off with one of those things...
I live out in the boonies with fewer than half full-time residents. The rest come in from the city to their vacation homes loaded with explosives and alcohol. It is the worst weekend of the year for the full-timers.
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:46 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphaba
I live out in the boonies with fewer than half full-time residents. The rest come in from the city to their vacation homes loaded with explosives and alcohol. It is the worst weekend of the year for the full-timers.
Same here, folks that live here are well aware of the fire hazzard. People that camp in the National Forest 1/4 mile away can be morons
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:53 PM   #26 (permalink)
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This is an interesting set of laws. In Au we can buy fireworks in one state (but not let them off I think) and let them off in another (but not buy them), although it's a while since I checked.
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Old 07-02-2005, 04:55 PM   #27 (permalink)
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I personally have this insane theory that your state's fireworks laws give a good indication of how much you lean towards being communist bastards.
Notwithstanding that fact that this is a rather amusing set of laws - do you realize that fireworks are legal in communist China? I was in Shanghai during new year and woke frequently during the night (in Nth floor hotel suite) due to the continual explosions.

We're talking stuff that sets of car alarms at a distance. Banging stuff, not glowing stuff.
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Old 07-02-2005, 05:38 PM   #28 (permalink)
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The Ohio laws are wonderful in the fact you can only legally set off smoke bombs and sparklers for the most part, but as stated above buy whatever the hell you want just get it the hell out of the state in 2 days. Couple good stories I have all involve the same day and the same trip to the fireworks shop.

Being a wild group of punks we proceed to drive down to a pretty good sized warehouse outside Lancaster that sells stuff, well the good part is when we get there they have the big signs set up and the table where you fill out your waiver....and get this...on the sign it TELLS YOU what states the fireworks are legal and to pick one when you fill out your waiver

Anywho we proceed to drop about $1,000 on some stuff pack it all in my trunk and head back home, I get pulled over for speeding on route 33 coming back into Columbus doing 80 in a 60 zone luckily I got off and did not get my car searched, although I was legally within my rights as I have 48 hours to get em out.
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Old 07-02-2005, 07:24 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by billege
My post was supposed to be on it's face absurd, especially throwing out what I did, and more to the point HOW I did, comments about various states laws.

No one's being overly serious on THIS message board...
Thank god at least one of you got a laugh.
I got it!

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Old 07-02-2005, 07:26 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphaba
"Specifically Prohibited: Firecrackers, skyrockets, salutes, chasers, and bottle rockets."

I think, but I'm not certain, that "salutes" are roman candles. I have no idea what a "chaser" is.

Have a great time.


They zip around on the ground while whistling, then blow up.
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Old 07-02-2005, 07:32 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Eep! That would spook the hell out of me if children or pets were around. Any idea what a "salute" is?
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Old 07-02-2005, 07:36 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Wow, comparing fireworks laws with communism is just not funny.

I mean, everyone knows communists are extinct. Terrorists, man, terrorists! If you don't blow shit up in your backyard on the 4th of July, the terrorists have won.
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Old 07-03-2005, 09:03 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian
Wow, comparing fireworks laws with communism is just not funny.

I mean, everyone knows communists are extinct. Terrorists, man, terrorists! If you don't blow shit up in your backyard on the 4th of July, the terrorists have won.
Communists? Extinct? Where were you when communism won the cold war before it even started?
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Old 07-03-2005, 11:34 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphaba
I live out in the boonies with fewer than half full-time residents. The rest come in from the city to their vacation homes loaded with explosives and alcohol. It is the worst weekend of the year for the full-timers.
Hahaha...my parents live in a community near the Hood Canal that swells to three times its size during the summer season. Fourth of July is a giant headache, to be sure, but the display put on around the bay where they live is AMAZING.
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Old 07-05-2005, 09:49 PM   #35 (permalink)
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To add a different angle to the discussion:

http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/07/05/tan....ap/index.html

I wonder: Where does one person's rights begin and another one's ends?

Funny things is, for all the communism rheotric, communist China has tons of fireworks available. Just visit there during their New Year.
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Old 07-06-2005, 04:45 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlatan
Considering the number of fires that were started on Victoria Day this year in Toronto due to the incorrect use of fireworks I don't have a problem with putting certain restrictions on the sale of fireworks.

And considering my neighbor is an idiot and launches his mortars at a 45 degree angle toward my house, I don't have a problem either. Ended up having to call the cops on him this year because one shot into a tree near my house and exploded. Not much left of the tree.
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Old 07-06-2005, 05:21 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Arkansas, along with quite a few other states it seems, doesn't care too much about my safety pertaining to fireworks. There's an age restriction and that's about it.

When I moved into this neighborhood about 6 months ago, the guys next door kept telling me to wait til the fourth. Apparently every year they had a big block party with BBQ grills going in every yard, the guy down the street brought his trampoline out for the kids, there would be beer for the grown-ups and, most importantly, some killer fireworks for all.

This year it didn't happen. The city council made it illegal to shoot off fireworks inside city limits a few weeks ago.

Here's what I think.... I'm a grown man. I'm responsible enough to maintain a household, I'm responsible enough to keep a job. Society trusts me enough to grant me a license to use of my speeding, metal, four-wheeled death machine, to carry a gun to hunt and the use of poisons to get rid of 'varmints' around the house. For some reason, however, they don't trust me enough to light a few fireworks.

Yes, there are a lot of idiots out there. But if society is going to punish the lot for the actions of a few bad (or just incredibly stupid) folks out there... well, you get the gist, right?
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Old 07-06-2005, 10:19 AM   #38 (permalink)
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This is right up there with the mandatory seat-belt laws.

Look, if I want to blow my hand off, or light my house on fire, let me. That's my problem. If I light my neighbor's house on fire, well there are other laws in place that cover that sort of stupidity, aren't there?


Let me have some damn fireworks. I'll take responsibility for whatever carnage I unleash if I get careless with them.
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Old 07-06-2005, 10:33 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Quote:
This is right up there with the mandatory seat-belt laws.

Look, if I want to blow my hand off, or light my house on fire, let me. That's my problem. If I light my neighbor's house on fire, well there are other laws in place that cover that sort of stupidity, aren't there?


Let me have some damn fireworks. I'll take responsibility for whatever carnage I unleash if I get careless with them.
I agree with this 99%. The one stipulation I have is that in Colorado, its hard to put a value on the 10,000 acres of forest you could burn down. I think there's a time and a place, and that can be mandated without impeding on normal intelligent citizens.
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Old 07-06-2005, 12:15 PM   #40 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tooth
This is right up there with the mandatory seat-belt laws.

Look, if I want to blow my hand off, or light my house on fire, let me. That's my problem. If I light my neighbor's house on fire, well there are other laws in place that cover that sort of stupidity, aren't there?


Let me have some damn fireworks. I'll take responsibility for whatever carnage I unleash if I get careless with them.
In the local paper today was a report of two very drunk guys shooting off a home made cannon. The neighbors were not pleased, and the police were not amused when the two idiots wanted to get hostile. They are currently guests of the county.
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