crashed

I just ended a two year marriage with what I thought was the perfect woman.
She cheated on me with at least two different guys and there are two more that I suspect.
I’ve read a few other posts about guys getting their hearts ripped out by some chic and I know that it’s not my fault that she did what she did and all that. The only problem that I have is that I’m worried that I wont be able to find a nice girl. I’m not into picking up girls at bars.
My question is to all the nice girls out there… where is a good place to meet you?

BBtB

Thats a damn good question. Better question. Do you even exist? They are defintly the minority these days.

__________________
Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"

Plummie

Try the library.

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Kim

Janie

They're out there, you just have to find them. Of course, if you're looking for perfection, you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Find someone who has flaws that you can deal with, like an insane love of the colour orange or something.

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cheers to the motherland

Cynthetiq

i found one... she's sitting right next to me...

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

HiThereDear

how'd you meet that one? whatever way it was, avoid that from now on. And if the next one you meet sucks (or more importantly doesn't), then try another way.
Just kidding - there's no such thing as a good girl (or guy). They're only good insofar as they're in a good situation, one they like. So, while it's not really true that you had nothing to do with her infidelity, it is true that its not a flaw in you, only in the relationship between you two.

Mael

a good place to meet people is through friends. if your friends happen to know someone, they can set you up and you can find out the skinny on her ahead of time... otherwise, go to a karaoke club. i don't know you'll meet anyone good, but hey, it's fun.

NetterButter

if you met one stupid girl at the grocery story, doesn't mean all stupid girls go to the grocery store. my point is, eh, don't give up cuzz your bound to BUMP into the "right and ideal" girl SOMEDAY.

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www.holeinthe.net

Kadath

According to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, they are "home with broken hearts." Perhaps you should just try ringing doorbells?

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it's quiet in here

charlesesl

Sometimes the more you look, the less you find.
When you stop looking, she will come to you.

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It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us.
Dr. Viktor E. Frankl

BBtB

You know in all seriousness that was my first response. But forget the libary. Try borders and or barnes and noble. I dunno if they are "good" but they sure are cute

__________________
Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"

rogue49

Women are just as shallow & selfish as men are at times.
The old cliche of men always being the dogs is not true.

There are good men & women
And there are bad men & women
And there are good men & women who at times can be weak.

Same arguement
Different sides of the coin.

They are out there,
it just may take some time, effort & pain
to filter through the bullshit.

But then again the other side is dealing with the same situation.
Pick your up, brush yourself off, and try again.

World's King

They do exsist.


I've been with one before... I was just too stupid to realize it at the time. I broke it off and regreat it to this day. God, I'm a fucking moron.

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heavy is the head that wears the crown

oblar

the colour orange? ick, of all colors!! No...*grin* Maybe if it was a cool colour that she was obsessed with, then I could deal with it..

but any warm colors: pink, red, orange, yellow....

ick.. ick *shakes off the ickiness*

redravin40

I found mine on TFP.
Which to me suggests that they are everywhere if you are paying attention.

Meridae'n

I hear u World's King... I was with one for two years before breaking her heart and then spending the next 4 years trying to figure out why i did it. Thats what we get i suppose when God gives us a brain and a cock, but only enough blood to run one at a time.

__________________
What's easier to believe: that a guy was born without sex in the manner of several Greek demigods and grew up to be able to transmute liquids and alter his body density yet couldn't escape government execution, or that three freemasons in a vehicle made with aluminum foil in an era before digital technology escaped our atmosphere, landing on the moon, broadcasted from there, and then flew back without burning up?

Glory's Sun

That's the truth. I know when I was looking I found nothing worth any value. When I stopped looking and concentrated on other things.. I found the most amazing girl. She has flaws but they are perfect in my eyes.

rockogre

They are everywhere! Just like regular people.

__________________
Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you,
Jesus Christ and the American G. I.
One died for your soul, the other for your freedom

*Nikki*

I have had the same problem finding good guys. Then I realized I was just overlooking them.

There are a ton of good guys and girls out there.

Try organizations that require volunteers. People who volunteer have kind hearts. Join something like this. You will be suprised.

I met my man online. He turned out to be one of the good ones.

Be selective who you give your love to.

Never think you have to "settle".

warrrreagl

So that's why my wife is so perfect; she works at a library. Hmmm.


I posted this in Tilted Humor, but it's appropos here:

If a dog strays away from home and finds love elsewhere, then women would say the dog is not getting enough love at home.

If a cat strays away from home and finds love elsewhere, then women would say the cat is not getting enough love at home.

If a woman strays away from home and finds love elsewhere, then other women would say the woman is not getting enough love at home.

If a man strays away from home and finds love elsewhere, then women would say that all men are pigs.

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Living is easy with eyes closed.

Mondak

They are all around us, I think it is more a matter of finding a healthy person instead. If you can find someone who is mentally healthy and comfortable with herself, that is a person that is more worthwhile. If you have someone who is all over you all the time, these stupid, codependant relationships form.

There is a book with a really stupid title that gives some exceptionally good advice that I would like to recomend.

Be Your Own Dating Service

You can pick it up on Amazon for about $10.00 on Amazon. Quick read, but makes a crapload of sence.

raeanna74

Other places to meet nice girls? Church, church functions, charity functions. Girls with heart will be helping others or celebrating their spiritual sides.

__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

nowthen

I found my perfect girl when I least expected it, and also half way around the world from my home.....

__________________

"People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them."

George Bernard Shaw

Minx

They are out there wondering where all the good men are.

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You've been a naughty boy....go to my room!

justadude

i'm of the belief that they just don't exist...

i thought i'd found one (and some days still do...) but for the most part i think men and women just exist to pro-create...and shouldn't try to co-exist emotionally...

Liquor Dealer

This is a total no brainer - there are lots of "good girls" . They keep them all locked up on a little island off the coast of some foreign country with all the Playboy Playmates. That's why you never see any of them except in pictures.

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Life isn't always a bowl of cherries, sometimes it's more like a jar of Jalapenos --- what you say or do today might burn your ass tomorrow!!!

JangoFett72

One found me right after I had just given up on looking. Its funny how life can be counter-intuitive like that!

fastom

I think that "stop looking ,she will find you" advice is a lie . I actually believed that for many, many years and all it did was leave me out of the loop.

I also was advised that good things come to those who wait... another falsehood... waited 25 years now and am only growing too old and unattractive for any girl to consider.

My advice, work hard at it... or better yet, lie. I have resisted trying that, but it's easy to see it works.

JStrider

i met my good girl in my cs class and she was also in my poli sci class... and man is she good... at everything...

__________________
-=JStrider=-

~Clatto Verata Nicto

Lebell

They're definitely there, right where you don't expect them. Frequently, you just have to open your eyes.

I did.

__________________
"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience." – C. S. Lewis

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crashed

Lots of good advice here.
Thanks to everyone that posted.
I think I'll try the volunteer
suggestion.

Pyrate

That's me! Though i'm not a girl...

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?

BoCo

Go back to church. You'll find plenty of good girls there.

__________________
Activism is a way for useless people to feel important.

suviko

Quite black & white to think all good people are in church. Or then I just don't get intrested in "good" and "nice" people. You can be moral and kind person without singing gospels every Sunday. maybe this is the whole reason of not finding sincerely good people if one can't look beyound religious background.

The best way to hook up with people is through mutual friends. They know what you both want and can show you new faces in their home parties. Or take the chance when something looks good. Talk to nice strangers in weddings & funerals. Talk to the girl walking her dog past your house every morning.

troit

I never thought I would say this but I'm learning that place like match.com are all that bad. After my recent break-up my mother got me a three month subscription (you know mothers). It's perfect and easy -- you put in what your looking for and they do all the work. If she's interested, she'll email you a message and a pic. No bs or games. If both parites are in agreement a date is set. I've been on a few. Nothing serious yet but had a few enjoyable meals with a few lovely ladies...

My dating tip for you that I learned the hard way -- suggest drinks. They can always turn into dinner but its hard to cut dinner short if the matchup is not what you anticipated.

__________________
I've yet to dephile myself...

The_Dude

go and look in a place that interests you the most.

maybe if you're an art person, try the museum.

if you're like me, try the local ACLU.

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"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." - Darrel K Royal

Liquor Dealer

Women are like city buses. You can catch one on almost any corner - if you miss one don't worry about it - There will be another one by in fifteen minutes.

__________________
Life isn't always a bowl of cherries, sometimes it's more like a jar of Jalapenos --- what you say or do today might burn your ass tomorrow!!!

ganon

i think the most important thing is that you do your utmost to be a complete person yourself. don't look for someone to finish you, or fill that big emotional hole, that's just too much for another human. get healed up and comfortable with being alone, and then welcome someone into your life that is in the same space that you are.

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"My give up, my give up." - Jar Jar Binks

DelayedReaction

Be careful about *looking* for people in libraries and bookstores. For the most part people are generally there to read, not to be bugged by someone looking for a date. But aside from caution, they're definitely good places. I worked in a Borders cafe for about nine months or so, and during that time I met a large number of extremely pleasant and interesting people. You deal with significantly fewer losers when you're around literature.

My advice would be to do the very thing I'm trying hard to do as well; get involved in something that makes you happy. I've often said that I'm content, but not happy, with my life. The only problem is that I've been hell bent on assuming that the reason I wasn't happy is because I was lonely and single. I've come to realise that if I'm not happy by myself, chances are very likely that I wouldn't be happy with someone else either.

So I'm working on finding things to do that I enjoy, and to stick with them. There are women out there in every field that men enjoy; you'll find someone.

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If ignorance is bliss, you must be having an orgasm.

Casdin

All the good girls are out looking for bad guys...