Phoenix

I think a person or couple that wants to parent a child should be required to have extensive background checks and psychoanalysis done. They should then have to submit a plan as to how they plan on raising this child, they should have to pass an exam on parental skills. Also, yearly checkups until the children are 18 years old should be done.

Too many people aren't getting adequate parenting and those children cannot , in turn, parent in the future. It's a vicious cycle that needs to be broken.

PredeconInferno

The problem with this idea is that it would be difficult to control who has a child and who doesn't.

I agree that some people should not have children.

However, I don't know if anyone has the authority to actually say who can and who can not have children.

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PorscheBunny

One of the inherent problems in any "parent license" attempts is deciding what exactly makes a good parent. Many of the qualities of a good parent aren't there until the parenting has already started, they are learned thru trial-and-error.

Another problem is deciding who says whether a couple can be parents in a system like this. Some bureaucrat? Someone who couldn't cut it as a real doctor? Someone who got the position as a political favor/payback?

Yet another problem is how are you going to enforce it? Prevent unlicensed children from extering school? Stop tax breaks for those with unlicensed children? Forced abortions? Infanticide?

What needs to be done is those who have proven that they cannot be trusted with children should be sterilized and separated from society (imprisonment of one form or another, exile, or execution). The children of those people need to be given help so as to try to break the cycle. There does need to be a greater emphasis on teaching teenagers some parenting skills (those that can be taught in the classroom anyway) and how to avoid becoming parents until they are physically, emotionally, and psychologically ready for parenthood.

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Reese

I think the government controls our lives enough already. Sure some people need to be sterilized but just like alot of other laws the government makes, Only the innocents are the ones really effected by it.

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ebeye

If you can't financially support yourself, you shouldn't have children.
If you haven't graduated high school, you shouldn't have children.
If you are a convicted of a violent crime, you shouldn't have children.

Some sort of implanted contraceptive device should be given to all kids once they hit say 10 or so, and it shouldn't be taken out until they want to have a child and can prove all of the above.

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aphex140

I do sometime have the though ' the wrong people are breeding'

As a 'laissez faire' person with regard to govt influence on our lives, I find it hard but I think there must be some control.

I hear of mother who spend more on fags and clothes than on their kids. THey seeem to think having a child is easier than working- this though on its own should mean they are naive and need to be stopped a job finishes and you go home kids are 24 -7.

You have to have experienced life before you can guide any growing child. I know that is controversial, but on the flip[ side I know a girl of 17 had a kid ( on her own) and they are fine. It was hard but she say she will be growing up with the child also.


Any one covicted of kiddy fiddling or child battery should be steralised, as part of the course

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ebeye

I think steralizing is too nice of a course of action there aphex140. Child molesters and beaters should be removed plain and simple. I'll never understand someone who wouldn't want the person that molested their child dead, nor would I want to understand them.

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sexymama

Wow, hot topic and very intersting. I spent 3 years of my life professionally teaching parenting classes and have volunteered as a parent ed. facilitator for the last 7 years. I have met many people over the years ranging from the best of the best to some of the "worst." Here is what I've learned:

1. Anyone can have a chid and not everyone should;
2. However, of those convicted of "neglect" or "physical abuse" type crimes, they are simply repeating what was done to them, they don't know how to parent any differently and they are usually open to learning;
3. Every parent that has ever been in one of my classes truly loves their child(ren);
4. Sexual preditors do not change and should not be allowed to have children!
5. I believe EVERY PARENT should be required to take parenting classes in the same way that every driver must take driving classes and every graduate must have attended school;
6. The best time to take the classes is not when the baby is first born and "cute and lovable" but when they hit the terrific twos and above;
7. Classes should be ongoing and required every 2 to 3 years.

Even as a parent educator, I consistently take time to learn more, especially as my children enter new stages of development. I'm always listening to Love and Logic audio tapes and reading the latest book.

The major problem with requiring parenting classes, is who decides what is the best way to parent? Do you go with Dobsen (? spelling) who says spank. Or do you follow Jim Faye who teaches natural and logical consequences. Does each parent educator get to teach what he/she believes, or will there be a "standard curriculum?" And who pays for all of this?

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bonehed1

Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids like some people shouldn't be allowed to drive.

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shalafi

Those are the biggest problems I see with requiring licensing/schooling. Who decides if your fit and who decides what IS good parenting? Well, that and I agree with cybermike that the govt is already intruding too far into our lives but this isnt the politics forum so Ill leave that alone.

BentNotTwisted

I think all high school students should be required to take a class in basic parenting. They may not use it for many years afterward, but at least the kids will have been exposed to some of the concepts. Now, as to the curriculum, that's another matter and I have no idea how to address it. I guess it would have to be decided by each school or school district.

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skysooner

Even if you did have a licensing procedure, there are always people who would beat the system or end up in a situation that they can't handle. By all accounts, my wife and I should be good parents, but our oldest turned out to have high functioning autism. There is nothing that can prepare you for something like this unless you experienced it growing up. There are just too many variables to make it realistic.

rockzilla

I'd think the biggest problem would be what to do with 'unlicenced' children. Do we force the mother to have an abortion? I would most certainly think not. I'd imagine the amount of children that would end up under care of the state would be staggering, which would cost taxpayers a fortune.
Requiring parents to be licenced seems like a great idea, but would all the cost and trouble of enforcing the rules (whatever they might be) make it worth the effort?

jujueye

Fantastic idea.

I also think that if people get low grades in any type of class like this, they should be limited to two children. Otherwise, they'll have five, six, seven kids, and never be able to lead even one of them correctly into adulthood.

lurkette

As an adult child of absolutely rotten parents, I'm torn about this. I look around and see a lot of misery and badly-adjusted people who probably could have turned out much better if they'd had decent parents. The "you have to have a license for a dog but any idiot can have a child" argument really resonates with me. If my own parents had been more mature and emotionally stable, I probably would be a more emotionally stable person myself. But I also see a lot of complete assholes whose parents were perfectly good. I think the causal relationship between parenting and behavioral outcomes is a really complicated thing to take apart. A lot of the things that make me miserable sometimes (occasional bouts of low self-esteem, anxiety, etc.) also make me who I am and are the flip side of the things that are my best strengths (because I sometimes don't feel good about myself, I try really hard to do well at everything; because I'm anxious, I'm also organized, methodical, careful, and thorough). I think it's really hard to play god with these issues and draw the lines in places that make sense for the well-being of society, and that also wouldn't produce a boring, Stepford-like race of Uber-children. I mean, really - think about some of the most well-adjusted people you know. Individually, they're great - but wouldn't it be boring if that's all there was?

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Craven Morehead

Ban all sex until the participants can pass a basic parenting exam?

Think that will work?

Dilbert1234567

i personaly think that everyone should be neuterd at birth, and then must pass some form of a test to have the reverse done.

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jujueye

Wow lurkette, nicely put. I hadn't thought of that side of it before.

By the way, I am memerized by your avatar.

:::OshnSoul:::

It's sad to know that some parents can't handle the responsibility and miss the love that comes from having the child-
but that't their free choice.
I would do anything to take children out of an unhealthy environment.
But what I can do for now is feel that overwhelming abundance of love with my son, and raise him to be himself and happy.

But to make someone take tests and apply for such a "liscence" seems so unecessary to those who are wonderful parents. Thinking through the consequences, changes, and responibilites should be enough for the human hopeful-parent, yet so many people don't stop and think- or prepare.

onodrim

Of course every child should have the right to grow up in a positive environment, and it would be wonderful if this could always be the case, but it's just not possible. Like many have already stated, there would be so many issues with a 'parental license' that it's just not a feasable option.
I do however, agree with the idea of having some sort of required high school course on parenting. Granted it wouldn't even come close to solving all the bad parenting out there, but it's certainly better than not being educated at all.

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moonstrucksoul

wow i thought i lived in America, not China.

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Rodney

Easy: give the exam, but don't make it binding. Just make the results _very public._

Here's my dream scenario. Before you have children, you must write a 10-page, double-spaced typed essay on your theory of raising children and how you would approach certain specified problems in child-raising. You would be required to present this paper orally, on a stage, before an audience of 30 to 50 experienced parents. Each parent would be issued a large sack of rotten tomatoes. As you begin to read, the audience is free to show its disapproval of what you say by throwing tomatoes at you, or show approval by failing to throw them. You of course are permitted to dodge as long as you keep reading, but your mobility is impaired by a five foot chain fastened to your ankle and the stage floor.

By the time you have finished your reading, a relative judgment of your child-rearing skills may be made by the amount of tomato smeared on your body. Anyone with three hits or less gets a certificate. Anyone with 20 or more gets a referral to parenting training.

Now, why can't government run by _sensible_ rules like these? :-)

raeanna74

Liscensing is not a viable solution. Some sort of parenting classes seems like a good idea but there are plenty of problems that come with it. If it were possible for the government to offer parenting classes to new parents free of charge or at a minimal fee they might prevent a lot of later costs due to poor parenting, resulting foster care, and other problems. I would be willing to spend my tax dollars in that direction. I would think of it as preventative maintance. Having worked in day cares and as a elementary school teacher I have seen all kinds of parents. Most parents want to do their best but early education can help them handle the stress of parenting better and perhaps prevent problems later. There are always going to be dead beat parents and "lisencing" would probably not prevent them from bearing children. The children would end up in the same place as without lisencing with these parents - foster care. I think it would be better if parents didn't get 3rd and 4th chances as I've seen though. A mother that allows her 9 yr old son to be sexually abused and then later sexually abuse is sisters and still does not supervise him closely to the point of him sneaking off and breaking into another person's home should not be allowed to get her children back a 3rd time. I think 3 strikes and your out. If people knew there was a limit to the grace of the government they might buckle down and start parenting their children right. When they don't - they shouldn't be allowed to continue screwing up their kids lives.

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SiN

Meh. big emotional topic with no easy solutions.

parenting class?
sure. we had something like that in high school. pretty basic tho.
no harm innit.

but it's far from the answer.
a better school-related answer is easily available birth control and sex education.
Unwanted/unplanned children i'm *assuming/guessing* are more 'at-risk'. especially unplanned to young parents.
anyone want to find proof? please do, i just don't have time/patience for it.

sure, open to learning...after they've already scarred their child for life.

i'm for preventing. catch these potential parents before they start breeding. break the cycle early as possible.

So - basically i think that perhaps those who are fairly well adjusted probably can figure out the parenting thing.
it's the ones with no good role models and/or abuse that are the problem.

i dunno. complex subject, and i have no expertise.
i'm just a non-parent who was raised overall ok.

i DO believe some things need to be changed, drastically perhaps.
i've known too many people with horrible parents. heartbreaking and frustrating.

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CyN1caL

And what if they happen to have another child? Have the government just take them away after labor?

billege

We can point out, all day long, the problems with such and idea. The fact remains that uncontrolled population expansion is not going to work.

Any environmentalist can tell you why the earth's resources are limited.

At some point we're going to have to decide who gets to have kids and who doesn't. The only alternative is finding a way to make sure all parents are "good parents."

Society doesn't let murderers run rampent, for good reason.
We have just as many reasons to not let some people reproduce.

You can bleat all day about why such an idea is bad, but I think it might be time to admit that rampant reproduction isn't working out that well.

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analog

To say you will restrict the number of kids- or whether people have kids- is a bit ridiculous. Firstly, because of the loss of basic human rights, and secondly because full implementation would be impossible.

Regardless of your past, a rational person would be able to identify that neglect is wrong, and CERTAINLY physical abuse is wrong. I don't believe we should just assume they're "unaware" of how to be a proper parent. Additionally, there are often other factors, such as alcohol (or other drug) abuse.

I think the best way to approach the situation is REAL education in the high school level. Not "human sexuality" or whatever they offer in some places- I mean an actual PARENTING class. And I think this class should be a full year. What a small price to pay to properly fund education instead of waiting for people to fuck up, and then paying for that.

Frowning Budah

I think we all know the idea of licensing wouldn't work, but I agree that I would sure like it to. Something needs to be done.

Holo

wow...talk about education snobbery. There are ppl a lot more successful than all of us combined that never graduated.

http://www.fundraising-ideas.org/org...s/dropouts.htm

This is just *A*


A

Abigail Adams.......wife of the 2nd U.S. President John Adams; America's 2nd First Lady (no formal education; home schooling/life experience)
Ansel Adams.........American wilderness photographer; photography book author; Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient
Bryan Adams......rock star
Miguel Adrover.....Spanish-born fashion designer
Christina Aguilera....rock star
Jack Albertson......Oscar-winning actor
Peter Allen.........Oscar-winning Australian songwriter-composer-singer
Rick Allen . . . rock star; member of "Def Leppard"
Dhirubhai Ambani....self-made billionaire Indian businessman
Anthony Andrews.....actor
Julie Andrews.......Oscar-winning actress-singer; best-selling British author (as Julie Andrews Edwards); bestowed the rank of Dame Commander of the Order of the British Empire in the year 2000 (United Kingdom: Dame Julie Andrews)
Christina Applegate......actress
Edwin Apps.........British artist
Joan Armatrading....singer-songwriter
Louis Armstrong.....singer-musician
Eddy Arnold.........country music star; Country Music Hall of Fame inductee
Cliff Arquette ("Charlie Weaver")....comedian-entertainer; American author
Brooke Astor........wealthy American socialite-philanthropist- author; Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient
John Jacob Astor......self-made multimillionaire German-born early American businessman; America's first multimillionaire
Chet Atkins.........country music star; Country Music Hall of Fame inductee; Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee; American author
Jane Austen......best-selling British author (elementary school dropout)
Gene Autry......Oscar-nominated singer-songwriter; the first "singing cowboy"; wrote and co-wrote over 200 songs, including "Back in the Saddle Again" and "Here Comes Santa Claus"; recorded famous rendition of the Johnny Marks song "Rudolph, the Red- Nosed Reindeer"; actor-producer; self-made multimillionaire American businessman; author; Country Music Hall of Fame inductee; National Cowboy Hall of Fame inductee; only person to have five stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in honor of career achievements in five entertainment fields
Richard Avedon......American photographer-author
Willy Aybar.....baseball player

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Cynthetiq

and the gene pool gets shallower and shallower because those that are having children shouldn't and those that should, aren't.

http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/journal...0of%20children

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floydthebarber

A license to parent is one of the most ridiculous ideas I've ever heard.
Parenting classes is a good idea, but a licence is a non-starter.

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japhyryder

I think the only people how should be restricted are welfare moms.

I love the idea of require parenting classes, state run or insurance run. All of the issues that would be help would be great. Mom and the babies' Daddy should be required to attend, to get the insurance to cover the birth

I think of all the things I would have learned if I had classes.

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