Holo

From the site:

RuinYourLife.com was conceived by the GodThief and me in 1999 to establish a free and open community of individuals interested in discussing ideas and sharing experiences on the theme of self-destruction. It was set up as a non-profit making resource dedicated to examining the phenomenon and exploring the art of self-destruction in all its guises.


This is a resource for those caught in the grip of SI (self-injury) but are creative in expressing it. They aren't pro-SI but offer a place that is lighthearted and open to those who may need it to display their wounds and feelings without judgment. To me it's amazing the level of hurt one can subject themselves to due to mental/emotional pain. The pictures/art section is very triggering and enlightening all at once. It demonstrates the level of pain living causes some of us.

Some may think SI is stupid, and I thought the same before I let myself read their stories and felt their pain and imagined what they are going thru to do this to themselves. It really is disheartening to see but necessary also. It gives me understanding there are many ppl silently suffering out there and to make an effort to be more understanding of others.


Site



This link doesn't take you straight to the SI pics, so if you click it you won't get slammed with it. It's the last link.

Pics/art


*<b>A word from your friendly moderator. This is a discussion board. You are all entitled to your opinions, but unless you are going to say something constructive, keep your comments to yourself.

This is a serious subject, and should be treated as such.</b>*

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I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince

YourNeverThere

thats insane

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The Above post is a direct quote from Shakespeare

Devilchild

Thankyou, i have found ths link very, very useful. i am going to read now.

Devilchild

why?

nobody at all sane is capable of doing somthing like that?

Holo

this pic right here demonstrates what society's harsh judgment of the overweight can cause:

didn't hotlink it so you have a choice to view or not

http://www.ruinyourlife.com/armfat.jpg


child abuse issues(I assume):

WARNING VERY GRAPHIC. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

http://www.woundgallery.com/view_att...?id=427&type=0


I think this piece of art sums up SI very well. Just a drawing.

http://www.ruinyourlife.com/hook.jpg

__________________
I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince

Kaos

I had a friend who was a "cutter". She even cut the word hate into her leg. But I don't think he has ever done anything as awful as those pictures to herself.

It took a long time but I finally got her to quit.

Intangible

I knew a few people who cut, including one of my friends girlfriends. She ended up moving cause when people found out she was nuts, they made fun of her, and she couldn't take it anymore. But damn, that "daddy fucked me and I liked it/KILL ME" image was horrible. What the hell would make you do that?

But damn, I feel bad for these people, I can't do anything to help though.

I was reading some of the posts there, and now i'm sad. Reminds me of a lot of times I thought i'd do something but never did.

skier

i believe they told you on their arm.

These people have suffered so much mental anguish... to attempt to compare it to physical pain is very difficult. It's an interesting way to attempt telling others how you feel.

pocon1

Fortunately, I have never felt the need to mutilate myself this way, but I see this as a cry for help.

Snakebyt

those are some very disturbed individuals

happymaan

I once cut my arm just to see if I could do it, but I never did it again.

Stare At The Sun

Personally i've cut once, when i was very down, but i have never had the desire to do it since, but at the time, honestly it did help, though it wasnt nearly as bad as that. Everyone deals with their problems in different ways. For some that is cutting...however, some of those people take it to a new level.

wannabenakid247

That is a real eye opener to the mental pain people can suffer!

supafly

It's a bit disturbing but that's just me.

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Thumbs up

Orodinn

I'm not sure I agree with this. I think there are better and more constructive ways to deal with depression. If youre depressed, instead of focusing that energy on destroying yourself, you could go lift some weight and at the same time build confidence and muscles too. I understand that the adrenaline you get from cutting yourself can make you feel powerful and in control...if only for a short while. And that, I imagine can get addictive, but I still maintain there are better ways to deals with problems. If you're that depressed, getting help is a nice start. You don't have to fight alone.

analog

*Statement I made was perceived as angry by others, and I've withdrawn it myself. Please do not take my tone in this post to be anger- it is frustration at first and mostly informative for the purpose of fostering better understanding towards those people we're discussing.*

With all due respect, that is a gross statement.

People who cut themselves do so for a variety of reasons, but cutting in general is not something they flaunt. It is a very personal, well-guarded portion of their lives. No one who is a real, honest cutter wants people to know they do it.

The only ones that do cut "just for the attention" are the ones that KNOW they will be found out, and usually the cuts are far from severe. This case is a "cry for help"- but everyone else is just trying to find a way to cope. When you feel depressed, the cutting makes you actually FEEL something... it's no wonder the most frequent description of depression is a feeling of numbness. Cutting allows them to actually FEEL something... and the adrenaline that kicks in makes them feel a little better, because of the inherent nature of adrenaline, which makes them feel like if they did it whenever they were sad, it would make them feel happy.

People like the guy who carved "my daddy..." on his arm are doing it because they feel as though they've been bad, and DESERVE it. He wrote that he "liked it" on his arm, which definitely means he feels as though it's his fault it happened. Can you imagine a teenage boy honestly feeling that his childhood rape was HIS FAULT? That's how some of these people deal with it. They feel as though it was their fault, and need to be punished, or that they're dirty, and shouldn't be alive. Very many rape victims are this way, not just childhood ones- how many times do you hear about a woman being raped but she didn't report it? Many times it's because they think they did somethign to provoke it, and therefore they shouldn't be upset it happened. That will cause major psychological damage..

I was never abused, raped or beaten as a child, but I had some nasty depression in my teen years. I'm glad that all I have to show for those years of pain are some leftover writings and poems, and no scars. The few scars that are visible are easily explained away as other things. Before posting this on TFP, exactly ONE person in my life knew even a LITTLE of it, and that was my now-ex girlfriend of 3 years, and that was only because I almost got caught doing it again (serious money problems) and decided to tell her.

Please be careful when you judge actions taken by these people. They are sad, or angry, and do not know they can be helped- many think help is impossible, and even if they could get help, that would mean telling your parents or loved ones or friends that you cut yourself, which is not an easy thought to bear.

Take care, everyone.

cheerios

guys, let's remember this is a sensitive topic and treat it as such. Bones, keep an open mind, analog, keep a reign on your temper. discussion is what it's all about, and unless we take the time to sit down and talk, we'll never learn from eachother.

nofnway

creeps me out......but that's just me

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"Iron rusts with disuse, stagnant water loses its purity and in cold water freezes. Even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind"
Leonardo Da Vinci

cheerios

welcome to depression.

Quote:

the people that do this need help its not normal

yes

Quote:

and i wouldnt be surprised if a lot of them did it jsut for the attention.

no

analog summed it up pretty good, but, imagine this, if you will. you, for whatever reason, feel like shit. take the day your dog died when you were 8, think about how you felt, alone, abandoned, now multiply it a million times, and trap yourself in it. no thinking of friends, or hte new puppy you'll get, just the abandonment, the pain, the isolation.
now, imagine being dumped into a cold pond. your fingers and toes are starting to go numb. you're cold, you're tired. you can't FEEL. you can't LOVE anyone. now, find something that gives you some feeling, some outlet for the lost-puppy feeling, something that gives you a little warmth.

And yes, maybe it IS a way to say "excuse me, someone help me the fuck out!" but that's not WHY it's being done. it's like the icing on the cake of FEELING.

cheerios

hey, no shame in that. it creeps me out, too, if not for the same reasons. just be sure not to let creeped out, turn into discusted and fearful. These are people, just like you.

YourNeverThere

hey devilchild, I have the word "death" scared permantly into my arm, and trust me I am insane. That of course is beside the point, I was saying that that site is insane not becuase of the graphics or anything derogatory but just that people want to send in things like that. Personally I didn't tell anyone about cutting myself for a long time, in fact not intill I had stopped for a year or two. Anyway, can sane people do that? of course, they are the only ones who would, becuase they are doing it for different reasons, because they like it, or whatever, and thats fairly sane.

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The Above post is a direct quote from Shakespeare

Fire

I have a friend who is dating a girl who cuts herself for attention-

the story is a long one- to give an example she decided to cut on herself at my friend's fathers funeral because she thought she was "loosing him to his family"

for the private cutters who are in the midst of silent desperation I feel nothing but sympathy

for her nothing but scorn and disgust

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Thought the harder, Heart the bolder,
Mood the more as our might lessens

mydragonfido

Wow that makes me faint to look at that!! Wow is life that bad you have to destroy yourself! I have so much sympathy for what they are going through! I imagine it could be very addictive to do that!

f00sion

looking at those pictures makes my legs give out.

__________________
Tell me what we’re fighting for— I don’t remember anymore, only temporary reprieve.
And the world might cease if we fail to tame the beast;
from the faith that you release comes an atheist peace.

saltfish

Good evening all,

I felt as though I have to put my $0.02 in.

Four years ago I began to date a girl, and unbenounced to me she had some problems in her past. Some of these problems had led to eating disorders and cutting. She cut her arms, she cut her legs and a she had been doin it for a number of years. I am going to go straight to the point. Once she realized that there were problems that caused her cutting and eating disorders she broke free from her depression and self-doubt she really regretted the cutting.

Now, I'm going to be frank with you, this girl is an Amazing student and is studying for a PhD in Medical Genetics. She is a really great student and a beautiful woman. Though when she looks at some of her old cuts, it really disturbs her. As soon as we graduate from school and get things moving we will look into having her scars removed.

She fears that many people, herself included, would continue to cut because the had already started... ...if she had never started doing it in the first place, she never would have kept doing it.

It is obvious that anyone who cuts to make themselves feel better does have some issues that they have not dealt with. I would have to say that no matter how someone feels about their cutting it is a very destructive, unhealthy behavior. A behavior that is reinforced with the belief that it is a way to "express one's self" or to "take control of one's life" That is something that is inharently false and only goes to perpetuate the behavior to others who will just to being to cut themselves.

I guess what ultimately disappointes me is the fact that I found out that my sister had been cutting herself. I was very disappointed to find out that this was happening. When I had confronted her and asked her about it, she said that her friends at school had been talking about cutting themselves and secretly she decided to do it herself.

Obviously there are a lot of people out there who have issues that they either do not know about, know about and are in denial, or choose to self medicate. (cutting, drugs, alcohol, excess masturbation)

I would have to urge anyone who beleive that they may have the urge to cut themselves to think about some of the important people in my life that regret ever cutting themselves and have to spend a great deal of time, money and pain to get their scars removed.

-SF

Eldaire

Who would participate in self-destruction? ARGH! Can't think of anything!

*bashes head into wall*

THINK THINK THINK