Double D

Does this surprise anyone?
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Wed June 18, 2003 08:24 AM ET

BERLIN (Reuters) - The modern Western woman is now almost as likely to cheat on her partner as a man, according to a new survey carried out for a German women's magazine.
In an online survey of 1,427 men and women aged between 25 and 35 by the Hamburg-based GEWIS institute for social research for "Woman" magazine, 53 percent of women said they had been unfaithful to their partner, compared with 59 percent of men.

"In recent years, numbers of unfaithful men and women have evened out a lot," GEWIS head Werner Habermehl told Reuters on Tuesday.

The survey revealed that non-sexual desires, such as the need for reassurance and understanding, were a primary motive among women for infidelity.

Habermehl said demographic factors were also behind the change in attitudes but more liberal attitudes to sex, greater knowledge about contraception, and more freedom for women had made having affairs less taboo than ever before.

As the frequency of cheating rose, the gap between the sexes was reduced, and eventually reversed.

Some 17 percent of woman said they had cheated two or three times, as against 22 percent of men. But when it came to having cheated four or five times in the course of a relationship, women moved ahead of men with eight percent against four.

YourNeverThere

i guess that makes sense, sort of, its just counter-intuitive(sp?) becuase men seemingly lust more, think with their groins, but hey i guess its evening out

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The Above post is a direct quote from Shakespeare

BBtB

I don't think women ever cheated less. They are just lieing on surveys less recently.

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Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"

lurkette

Perhaps the social and economic consequences for women's infidelity are much less severe now than they used to be? I imagine if you had no education and couldn't support yourself you'd be a lot less likely to risk the destruction of your marriage. Maybe now that women are able to work freely and earn an independent income they're as free to cheat as men have always been? Just a theory.

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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

clavus

BBtB beat me to it.

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gibber71

Christ,put a women in a business suit and they think they got a dick...Heh heh Good point though.I wonder if this is what the feminist movement of the 70's had in mind.

Double D

I believe we had the right to cheat even in the bad old days.

yatzr

so do these women have male secerataries that they're cheating with??

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Bill O'Rights

Equal rights baby! Gotta take the good with the bad. And yes, I do think that women cheat just as much as men. Who do you think they're cheating <b>with</b>? It ain't all blonde bimbo sexataries. It's Jane down the street.

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"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

gov135

Women cheat all the time. Period.

This is another good example of some of the double-standards Western society holds for men and women. As evidenced above, a woman cheating is intriguing and an expression of feminism and independence. Men cheating - you are a homewrecker, a scoundrel, and generally no good.

suviko

Men have the whole porn industry catering for their needs if they want to get sexual satisfaction during spouse's dry spell. Women have what, Harlequin books? Gee.

It has been for long the duty of a woman to be a selfsacrificing mother and wife while men sort of "earned" the right to be more easily forgiven, being hard-working family supporters. Men could wander in the public while women were at home. You gotta be able to meet someone who to fuck with to be unfaitfull. Internet makes it even more easy, but also women being economically more independent and less scared of possible divorce and and woking outside home and having their own hobbies in mixed gender groups and not just Rotary Women activism or bridge nights of the women from the same block anymore.

Anyway I don't believe those statistics complitely. They are done as questionnaires and part of what they present is what people want to be and what they value versus what they actually do. Cheating is not as big taboo as it used to be and women get more confident in admitting it. And like others said, it's not the secretary (or a single woman) men are sleeping with but someone pretty much like their own wife or girlfriend. I saw a documentary about a detective who was hired to find proof of infidelity (for divorce cases mostly, or future possible divorce cases..) and he claimed women take cheating more severely than men. Also he had found that women cheat with married men who are just about the same age as their own man but that men cheat with ~5 years younger woman who has longer hair than gf/wife. His theory on this was that women have long hair when they are single to seem beautiful and attract men and then they cut it shorter so it's easier to maintain when they pair with someone and men miss the way she used to be when they first met when he goes cheating.

Daval

Agreed!

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"It is impossible to obtain a conviction for sodomy from an English jury. Half of them don't believe that it can physically be done, and the other half are doing it."
Winston Churchill

warrrreagl

Oh goody. Any chance I can get to keep posting and re-posting this....

If a cat strays from home and finds love somewhere else, women would say that the cat is not getting enough love at home.

If a dog strays from home and finds love somewhere else, women would say that the dog is not getting enough love at home.

If a woman strays from home and finds love somewhere else, other women would say that the woman is not getting enough love at home.

If a man strays from home and finds love somewhere else, women would say that all men are pigs.

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Living is easy with eyes closed.

BBtB

Ah yes, the simple truths as told through jokes.

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Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"

Somenosuke

Agreed. Personally, this "cheating is an expression of feminism and independence" stuff is a large crock of shit. Cheating is disrespecting whatever commitment you made to be with someone, no matter who does it. Your gender doesn't excuse a damn thing. If I were a man dating a woman, and she cheated on me, she'd be kicked to the damn curb. Any man who cheats on me gets the same treatment. Fucka buncha "feminism and independence" bullshit.

I see what you're getting at here, though people don't always cheat because they're not "getting enough love." I call it suffering from cranial-rectal inversion, some of the time. There are times when people will give everything that they've got and put their best effort into a relationship and still get fucked over.

The way I see it though, if you want to fuck around, get out of the goddamned relationship you're in. It's that simple. And if it's not that simple, don't cheat. If you're old/mature enough to be in a relationship, you should be old enough to maintain some self control. Male or female. And if you find yourself in a cheating mindset, maybe it's time to look at what's wrong with the relationship and make an effort to fix it, or just walk away. Mind you, nobody is perfect, and I damn sure ain't, and I'm not trying to pass judgement or be preachy. Some things in life just shouldn't be treated like rocket science, though.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.

livingitup101

I'm not too surprised by this. It seems that about half the girls I've spoken to about this admit to cheating on their BF at some point in time. (Not necessarily current BF, just a previous one.)

MikeyChalupa

Somenosuke... excellent point. You sum it up completely. There should never be the need to cheat, male or female. Why? Because you owe it to your partner to stay committed. And if you don't want to be committed any longer, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP before fucking someone else. If there is something that you really love about the person that keeps you from ending the relationship, but the sex is no good, MAKE THE SEX GOOD. If the relationship is worth it, then the effort this requires is worth it too.

Have I cheated in a relationship? No. I haven't had to. There was one opportunity I had, with a girlfriend (in a relationship of her own) of the girl I was dating, with whom there was a mutual attraction. When we realized this, and that the seeds existed for a relationship to develop between us, we both broke up with our current SO's and started dating. We had a great relationship for a long time primarily because it didn't have to be hidden and there was no guilt involved. Yes, it took our old SO's a while to get over it, but they later told us both that they were glad we didn't cheat on them.

Have I been cheated on? Of course. Did I kick her to the curb? Sure. But not before explaining that all I would have asked was that I be broken up with first before she decided to sleep with half of a fighter squadron. At the time, I might have made a half-assed attempt to keep her, but all I would have needed was for her to say, "I no longer desire a long-term relationship with you. Instead, since I'm young, attractive, and right now have the opportunity to have lots and lots of casual sex with many different men, I think it's only fair to ask you to terminate the relationship so you don't get hurt." I wouldn't have taken it personally, some women (and men, of course) think they're ready to commit to a relationship but find out that they aren't. Or, at least, not with that particular person. The world would be a nicer place if they'd just be honest with their partner first.

Now, all this assumes that at the pivotal moment, when you have the opportunity and the means to actually cheat, that you are able to exercise the self control to stop yourself until you get the chance to either reconsider, or end your current relationship. I suspect this is where mot people have their trouble.

-Mikey

raeanna74

I have talked to a number of women who cheated or are cheating and the economic consequences are one big reason. Also the fact that so many women are working outside the home as compared to the last generation allows them to meet a larger number of people increasing the possibilities for cheating. It also makes sense that they are now telling the truth more because the consequences and social criticism isn't quite as harsh on the women anymore. One reason they don't always leave though is because of the children. Who wants to take care of the kids by themselves? Ever seen Bridges Over Madison County? It sums up one situation that I know of pretty well. Just different location - same reasons.

Glory's Sun

This doesn't surprise me at all. I think it's the fact that women have shirked the " I have to be perfect" attitude and they feel that they are entitled to the same rules as men are. You see it alot in high school and college girls. I mean if they have casual sex with lots of people it's ok because they are just having fun and if a guy can do it so can a girl. As far as cheating goes I kinda go along with the theory that they just lied on all the other polls