Originally Posted by Puttz

Swinging non-monogamous sexual activity, treated much like any other social activity
I absolutely love that description, it’s really pretty perfect. Non swingers go out, have a drink, chat, and then go home. We go out, have a drink, and then go home and fuck each other. LOL
I could easily write more about this subject than anything else previously (and if requested I can start an ask / tell thread about swinging if one doesn’t already exist) but because I’ve already written a freakishly huge post I will keep it short.

Swinging is all about the social & physical aspects of casual (or semi casual) sex. Swingers rarely make deep emotional connections, occasionally very great friendships are made though. Think of this no differently when best friends hang out, we just also enjoy sex with each other. We allow our friendships to become physical. In my social group it’s perfectly normal and acceptable to tell my buddy his wife his hot and I’d like to do all kinds of things to her.

I love my wife very deeply, we have a great relationship. As a matter of fact swinging has brought us closer together… we are not “on the outs” or disinterested in each other in anyway. We love sharing each other, and having new experiences, learning new things, and meeting new people. Variety is the spice of life, why does that have to stop at the bedroom door?

An interesting observation about couples who swing, those who have been doing it for any length of time almost always have very secure and stable relationships. Swinging quickly weeds out people that are not emotionally mature. Swinging makes a great relationship stronger, and will tear to shreds a relationship with issues.

Originally Posted by james t kirk

The woman I've been dating and I have recently discovered the joys of Swinging. (Prior to that, I guess I could have been classified as a serial monogamist who cheated from time to time, or not, depending....)

I must say, I'm a convert. We've been frequenting 2 swingers clubs in town where they only allow couples in and at some point you end up in the back room naked with other people having sex all around you.

Both she and I really enjoy it and we're both surprised just how much we do and look forward to it.

I figure that something like two thirds of all women cheat anyway, so why not just make it into a positive. In this way, we each get to get our ya yas out whilst the other is 3 feet away with someone else.

It's kind of thrilling to watch her get fucked by another guy to tell you the truth.

Ironically, it's made our relationship one of the strongest I've ever had. We're committed to each other, we just like to have sex with other people (in front of each other.)

I'm a believer. I truly believe that I'd never want to be in a conventional relationship ever again. If the woman I am dating now and I ever were to break up, I'd seek out another woman open to the idea of a swinging lifestyle.

Originally Posted by james t kirk

The figue of 2 thirds I remember reading.

Sheri Hite in her book on Female Sexuality claims it's closer to 70% (though there was a lot of criticism of that figure.)

In either case, I do believe that more women cheat than don't, so why not just turn it into a positive.

The Swingers club thing in Toronto has been very interesting I must admit. Not just because of all the sex out in the open, but talking to other people there about it.

So many people that I talk to at the club all say the same thing - they really enjoy it and they are surprised just how much they do. I must admit, I do very much enjoy it. I guess it's like the thrill of the first time you're with someone. This one woman said to us, "You know, I go into work on monday and my coworkers invariably ask, ,"so how was your weekend", and I say, "it was great" and they ask, "yeah, what did you do?" to which she has to say something stupidly not true"

Originally Posted by Puttz

Haha that is so distinctly true... only with other swingers can you really say what you did this past weekend.

It's also amusing listing to my "vanilla" friends talk about their "wild and crazy" sexcapades.... which usually consist of say, renting a porn, or buying a dildo or something :P


This is getting rather derailed though, I will make a "discuss swinging" thread here in a minute