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Old 07-10-2003, 05:28 AM   #1 (permalink)
feeling tingly
 
Simon says: Pound the sausage

Pirates first baseman Randall Simon was arrested last night after the Pirates' game against Milwaukee and faces a possible battery charge this morning.

During the famed "Sausage Race" after the sixth inning, Simon swung a bat at one of the costumed participants, hitting a 19-year-old girl. She fell near the Pirates' dugout and another participant, a 21-year-old girl, tripped over her. Both girls were sent to the stadium First Aid station and treated for scrapped knees.

What kind of street cred can Mr. Simon expect for sausage abuse?
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Old 07-10-2003, 05:47 AM   #2 (permalink)
Loser
 
that is one hard motherfucker! word!

seriously though, what a tool.
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Old 07-10-2003, 05:51 AM   #3 (permalink)
feeling tingly
 
If you would like to see the alleged "pounding"

http://www.post-gazette.com/pirates/...mon0710ap5.asp
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Old 07-10-2003, 07:18 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Midwest
Ahhh.. I remember the time I had a sausage race with several lovely young women....

Street Cred? Well, it appears to me that no matter what you do, as long as its not legal, you boost your street cred.

I looked at the video. Battery charges, I don't know. But then again, you can't bring someone up on dumbass charges. He deserves some form of community service.
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Old 07-10-2003, 11:01 AM   #5 (permalink)
All hail the Mountain King
 
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Location: Black Mesa
I don't think the bat even touched the costume, let alone the girl inside of it. He got fined $400 so just leave it at that. He has be convicted of dumbassery so lets move on.

However, considering the hilarity of the situation the sports media will be all over this for days. Best headline so far "Pirate beats the meat in front of fans."
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Old 07-11-2003, 02:34 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: West Lafayette, IN
Sportscenter has been having a field day with it. The girl doesn't seem upset over it.
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Old 07-11-2003, 03:53 PM   #7 (permalink)
Tilted
 
It is too bad he used a bat. That is a dangerous tool, and did he know where her head was in that costume?
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Old 07-11-2003, 05:10 PM   #8 (permalink)
WoW or Class...
 
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Location: UWW
Yeah, you can obviously tell by where someone's arms are. Those things are 8-10 feet tall, you look out of them through the mouths of the sausage's/weiners.

SC has had the best coverage of "Sausagegate" so far with their 5 minute mockery of the whole thing.
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One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink but then held it out over the beer and yelled "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU BASTARD!"
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Old 07-11-2003, 09:46 PM   #9 (permalink)
Upright
 
I pound my sausage everynite!!!!!
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Old 07-22-2003, 11:59 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: Omaha, Ne
Glad to see we have finally made it a few days without seeing the same video footage replayed on ESPN.
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Old 07-23-2003, 12:13 AM   #11 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Brian Fellows
Glad to see we have finally made it a few days without seeing the same video footage replayed on ESPN.
now we get 24/7 news on kobe bryant, which isnt much better
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Old 07-23-2003, 12:17 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Location: Omaha, Ne
Yep, wonder what the next story of the week will be.
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Old 07-23-2003, 12:22 AM   #13 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Quote:
Originally posted by Brian Fellows
Yep, wonder what the next story of the week will be.
im betting some other court case of an athlete doing a bad thing...
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