anitalife2

I am a female, and a very sexually driven one at that. I always have been.

Several months ago I got out of a longterm relationship, and even though I've had sex a couple times since then, I'm finding myself very sexually unfulfilled. So I've taken up masturbation much more fiercly in the meantime.

Now, a male friend (I'm not sexing) and I were talking about how much each of us touch ourselves, and apparently I masturbate more than him (I think he lies) and he was giving me a hard time, like it's bad for girls to do it or something.

That isn't fair is it??

nightstuff

Well whever i hear of a female masturbating im having to fight back thoughts of "what a waste of an orgasm!", though I totally agree its unfair to treat males and females differently.

Our attitudes towards masturbation have drasticly changed over the last 10-20 years, becoming more open today than before, but there are still this lots of people who treat it as being shameful in some way. Good girls dont have large sexual appetites in the first place, so for them to want masturbation its double bad...thats how people used to think anyhow.

Kadath

A man who is lame about a woman masturbating deserves a kick in the stones. Also, "what a waste of an orgasm" sounds an awful lot like a woman's orgasm is something that should be granted by a man -- get over yourself, hmm? I'm all for women masturbating. It is good when women masturbate and have large sexual appetites!

Side note: "fierce masturbation" is a lovely turn of phrase.

Second note: that's a lot of uses of the word "masturbate." Ooh, one more!

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nightstuff

Ahh, get over myself huh...suggestion: make a special point out of in the near future cultivating a taste for sarcasm. Its one of those things that lighten our load in life, so I can strongly recommend it.

I love horny masturbating girls *twinkle*

MEAD

I bet he just makes fun of you because its a way for him to get on the subject, a subject which he finds arousing... Maybe that's just me haha. Honestly though, guys are VERY open about masturbation, it's very different when a girl talks about it to us, he probably has no idea how to take it.

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doncalypso

Actually I think that your "fierce masturbation" habit is very good because by turning to masturbation you're becoming much more attuned to your body and you have a better handle on what sort of clitoral stimulation works best.

If more women masturbated "fiercely" (as you so eloquently put it) then I'm certain that they'd be more inclined to be open with their men and let them know how best to be touched, and everybody would come out more satisfied in bed.

This being said, I think your friend is an idiot. While I can understand why a man might feel that masturbation is a waste of orgasm, there is no reason he should feel that way when a woman is the one doing the masturbating.
The way I see it, when a man has to resort to masturbation it's a sign that his game is so lame that he can't get any sex so he must resort to spanking the monkey---that's how I feel when I jerk off because I'd rather have the real thing but I just can't get it. However, when a woman masturbates I see it as a turn-on because from my perspective she's taking the time to get to know her body more so that if I ever have sex with her she won't be afraid to let me know how to touch her best so that she reaches climax.

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Coppertop

Who are you masturbating for, yourself or your friend? Who cares what other people think? Do what you know feels good.

BigBen

If that's the case, my game is the Washington Generals getting their ass kicked by the Harlem Globetrotters.

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nightstuff

Hehe, thats a good point Copper

snowy

I know plenty of guys who get sex and still masturbate...so I think your logic is a bit off. My SO masturbates from time to time simply because he has the sex drive of an adolescent and I, well, don't (that isn't to say I don't have a high sex drive, because compared to the general population I do, my boyfriend is just constantly horny/wanting sex) and I have a lot of guy friends with girlfriends who masturbate on a more or less regular basis. I also know a lot of guys who do have game but masturbate because it's a safer alternative than trolling the bars.

Back on topic...masturbation rocks. Don't let someone else's insecurities prevent you from discovering what you like sexually.

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doncalypso

To clarify myself, when a man's only recourse is masturbation (unless he chooses to go to prostitutes) then it does mean his game is lame... at least that's how it feels to me.

Don't get me wrong, I love the feeling of orgasm right before ejaculation, but I feel like one big lame idiot when I have to resort to jerking off because I can't get any. I've been on a dry spell for almost five months, and in the past I've even stooped low enough to resort to using prostitutes after a two-year dry spell. Trust me, in such situations getting your itch scratched through prostitutes or masturbation only makes you feel worse because it reminds you that you have to go to desperate means while others can get it normally.

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onodrim

Don't worry about what other's think anitalife2, you're doing what is best for you. I'm in a long distance relationship, and between visits I definently have just as strong of a sex drive as I do when I'm with him. I have no problems admitting that I masturbate *a lot*, and you shouldn't either. Anyone who has a problem with it is just caught in an unhealthy mindset of some kind.

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hossified

you're comparing masturbation as hitting a low, similar to that of using prostitutes??? Man I would love to hear your logic on some other issues. I can understand if you mean you have a guilt feeling....but to say that because a guy can't or chooses not to get a piece and masturbates instead is equal to that of paying for sex from a prostitute......is pretty ludicrous.....

to stay on topic...I think more females should masturbate, and learn their bodies better.....perhaps than, more girls wouldn't complain about not achieving orgasms through regular sex. It's this stigma that it is 'dirty' or 'wrong' that really ruins the fun of it....

doncalypso

You have misread me so I'm gonna try to make myself clear this time around.

I am not saying that resorting to masturbation equates to hiring the services of a prostitute... at least not inherently.

The point I'm trying to convey is that when a man masturbates or hires the services of a prostitute because he can't get any woman to have sex with him of her own volition---and those are his only options to relieve sexual tension---then both situations end up being low points where he has to stoop down to such level in order to find satisfaction.

Some guys can be in relationships and yet they choose to masturbate because they just enjoy it. Some guys can get laid with any woman they want but they prefer to hire the services of a prostitute instead. That is NOT what I'm talking about.

Again I will re-emphasize my point: My beef is not with the fact that a man chooses to masturbate or to go to a prostitute. In my opinion a man stoops low when he has no choice but to masturbate or hire the services of a prostitute because his game is too weak to have a woman be willing to have sex with him of her own volition. At least that's how I see it (or rather how it feels to me).

Have I made myself a bit more clear now?

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Kadath

I guess, but your clarification doesn't make me any less dismissive of your opinion.

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ryfo

You go girl, dont let others dictate your life People still look at females as 'ladies' and 'ladies' dont need to do 'that' while men have 'needs' which have to be 'fufilled' however they can. Sounds old and corny but the older generation still exist.

PennyPureheart

[QUOTE=nightstuff]Well whever i hear of a female masturbating im having to fight back thoughts of "what a waste of an orgasm!", though I totally agree its unfair to treat males and females differently.
[QUOTE]

I was a little surprised when I saw that you think "what a waste of an organsm"... when women can have orgasms endlessly without significant rest periods between them. When my guy has told me he has masturbated, I have thought "what a waste of an orgasm" because I know he is done for the time being... no matter how I feel.

Rubyee

DING DING DING! It's like going to a restaurant with no refills- slow down, slugger- that's all you get.

Meanwhile, women are at McDonalds refilling at the soda fountain all they want to until they leave. And, if you keep the cup, you can sneak back in the next day and get more soda.

Men aren't used to women pleasuring themselves for many reasons. My theory is that since it takes much more work for a women to get herself off than for a man to get himself off, it is MORE sexual and should be used in extreme measures. Plus, I think it scares men to know that women can get themselves off- they think we will need them less.

Once again- just theories on what men think.

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Dragonknight

As far as myself (and the vast majority of men I know) a female masturbating is a BEAUTIFUL thing. Just hearing about it is a pleasurable experience. I agree with most of the other posts when they say that you should not feel bad about masturbating. It's a pleasurable experience and should not be looked down on for any reason. I bet if you asked your friend if he would watch you masturbate he'd say yes in a heart beat without even thinking about it. Enjoy all that you do, and have no fears, it's a great thing.

nightstuff

[QUOTE=PennyPureheart][QUOTE=nightstuff]Well whever i hear of a female masturbating im having to fight back thoughts of "what a waste of an orgasm!", though I totally agree its unfair to treat males and females differently.
Yupp, Im also surprised at my thoughts, which is why i wrote "fight back thoughts". It's by no means rational, and I think its just funny that my subconcious mind would hear about masturbating girls and want to remedy the situation. I will always see a bit of irony in two horny singles comparing how often they masturbate.

volover

I love when women talk to me about masturbation, instant turn on. Nothin wrong with it, just enjoy

Redlemon

Oops, I thought "Male vs. Female Masturbation" was a contest. Nevermind.

/So what am I going to do with all of this training?

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Seaver

Nobody love me like me!

Nah, I have a gf. She has an enormous sexual appetite. However I dont always want to go all the way to her place, or simply dont have the time. She masterbates (she has quite a few toys), and I love watching her touch herself.

For me it's just not a big deal. It's not about not being able to get any (yes I read what you wrote and understand what you're saying), it's simply about doing what feels good.

Gilda

I get pretty much all the sex I want, and I still occasionally masturbate. It's just a matter of sometimes needing a different form of stimulation from what a partner gives you. Sometimes I'll masturbate while Grace watches and vice versa, or as foreplay. It's about enjoying a variety of sensations, a variety of different ways of doing things.

Gilda

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Suave

That's a stupid idea that is a remnant of ancient stupidity. Also, it's stupid. I think girls should masturbate as much as they want to! Nothing wrong with female promiscuity either. Good for the gander, good for the goose and all that.

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