Philangicality

I'm a virgin of 21 years. I am waiting for the right girl to come along but I seem to be having this reoccuring problem with women. I'll see a girl that I'm attracted to and most of the time I'll approach her. I'll talk to her, ask bashic questions pertaining to the situation and sometimes I'll go a little further and start flirting making inuendos, talking about feelings etc. I try to take things slowly. However there are certain girls that I'm a little more aggressive after. I always have sexual thoughts going through my mind with all females but some I tend to get more physical with like grabbing, brushing up against them, etc. I can't really tell if they like it or not since sometimes I get a positive response with a smile and sometimes It'll be a wierd look or whatever. I just can't get the question out of my mind if they enjoyed the experience or not and if I should pursue it further. Any thoughts or suggestions?

777

Here you go: http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthread.php?t=31052
Plan9's guide to dating and pick ups. Enjoy.

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lurkette

There's a difference between flirting - casual touching, "accidentally" brushing up against someone - and being aggressive - "grabbing." I can pretty much guarantee that "aggressive" = "creepy" for most women. Play on the safe side, and if you start to sense that a girl is enjoying the flirting and would like something more, time for The Talk. Communication is your friend.

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Aladdin Sane

Dude, don't be grabbing girls. They don't like it. Don't be brushing up against them. That's creepy. These kinds of behaviors will get you labeled "Perv" or "Sicko." Worse, you could get into serious trouble in certain situations. Most guys are like you in that we always have sexual thoughts going through our minds with every female we meet, but it sounds to me like your judgement about proper social behavior is way outta wack.

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betula

Also, realize that different women like different things. Some may like heavy flirting, while others do not. There isn't one 'move' you can have that will work all the time. Be patient and don't push.

lindseylatch

whew, yeah, I hate guys i don't know touching me...In any way. I totally shut down and go into "get away from me" mode.
And innuendos are just as creepy...Ask for a date, be straight forward.
And what are these "basic questions pertaining to the situation?" If you're just walking up to chicks and saying "Do you have a boyfriend?" that might be a little odd...

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dlish

id agree with linseylatch.. that sorta behaviour can be very creepy..and could get u in trouble if her partner is just round the corner.

and basic questions..yeah i'd like to know what those questions are too.

patience is the key..if shes interested she'll show you.. dont ge all touchy touchy..thats a sign of desperation... ure not a ticking time bomb regardless of blueballs or not

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Suave

He probably means small talk by basic questions. Stuff like "so, are you on birth control?", "do you have herpes?" and "what's your sign?"

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greeneyes

Lay off the grabbing and the "accidental" touching, one day you could be facing a sexual harassment charge.

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