Demeter

I am on an antidepressant thats sucking the libido out of me. I've gone from a leg humping nympho to one of those girls who prefers cuddling (WTF?). I can't go off my meds right now, so its something I have to endure for a while yet.
I guess I was wondering how any of you handle this & if you feel an overwhelming guilt for your SO? Man, this is so not like me at all...

StanT

My wife had the same problem, it's a well known side effect of most anti-depressants. There are literally dozens of other medications available. Talk to your doctor and try somthing else. It took my wife a lot of tries to find one that worked and didn't have crappy side effects, but it was worth the effort.

la petite moi

demeter, I feel your pain. I take the depo provera shot for my BC, and I used to enjoy sex- now I feel like it's boring and there is no reason. Like you said, I am now more of a "I like to cuddle" girl. I feel VERY guilty, to the point of extreme depression and crying. I feel for you.

Elusive Dreamer

i used to be on lexapro, zoloft, and adderall. they all made me feel like sex was just, blah.. and i could truthfully do without.
Now, being off it all for now a year, i feel more like me. my sex drive is VERY healthy and i usually want 'it' whenever i'm with my SO.

basically, when i was on these meds, i just dealt with it because at that time in my life, it was more important that i get mentally healthy then have a good sex drive. i understand it's difficult and hard to cope with but if you're with someone that's caring and is sympathetic to your situation and it's needs... they'll be there for you in the end of it all.
good luck.
remember that your mental stability is important to your daily life!

DEI37

To you laides that enjoy "just cuddling," come on over. I love to cuddle. Sex is the icing on the cake. Won't bother me none!

__________________
Generally speaking, if you were to get what you really deserve, you might be unpleasantly surprised.

lurkette

Aw, DEl...that's awfully sweet! I'm seriously tempted.

Back to the subject at hand, Demeter, one thing you can see is if the medication you're on has a controlled release version. I'm on Paxil CR (Controlled Release) and for some reason the timed release lessens the side effects. The sexual side effects usually only last for two or three weeks for me, but everyone's different. You could also see if it's possible to decrease your dosage. Finally, I'll jump on my "exercise!" soapbox - exercise alone is clinically proven to be as effective as most antidepressants at regulating depressive symptoms, and might let you lower the dosage sooner or even get off them altogether.

Good luck, hon.

__________________
"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

la petite moi

lurkette, Paxil CR just worsened my sex drive. I was a stone cold bitch due to depo and paxil....It was hell.

Konichiwaneko

doesn't sound like an anti-depressent if it's taking sex away.

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Grasshopper Green

I'm on lexapro right now and while I feel better than I ever have, I have no sex drive and it really bothers me as well. My problem is I tried other meds and was allergic to them.....so I'm taking this one because I know this is the only side effect I have. Hubby is understanding of it, although he would like me to get off them as soon as possible However, I will probably be on them for awhile because I wasn't functioning at all before I started them. I don't have any advice, but I do have sympathy and empathy!

__________________
"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"

Formerly Medusa

Joan of Arc

Yes it does do that. But I think it gets back to normal later on. In fact, I know it does.

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"Insanity and Genius are on the same side of the street"

crazybobmarley

switch to dextromethorphan and pot

Irishsean

Yeah, because we all know hallucinogenics and downers really help people who are already depressed! wtf?

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There are no absolute rules of conduct, either in peace or war. Everything depends on circumstances.
Leon Trotsky

Konichiwaneko

I'll get slapped for this, but since my good friend just commited suicide because of using Anti-Depressents I'll say it.

Isn't anti-depressents hallucinogens anyways? magic pills take the pain away? hmmm.

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Demeter

There is no hallucinating.(WTF?)
They take away my constant daily urges to kill myself. Without them I cannot cope, I cannot make decisions, leave the house or get out of bed. Its not that I'm just feeling a little blue or out of sorts.
They aren't "magic pills". I have a real chemical imbalance in my brain, like how diabetics have a malfuntioning pancreas. Its a chronic condition (dysthemia) and I will more than likely be on them as long as I live.

k9trainingbiz

Demeter,
as a long time member of the mental health profession, I can assure you that any SSRI's (Paxil, Lexapro, Zoloft, Prozac just to name a very few) almost always will suppress sexual desire and response, and it is not temporary unless meds are discontinued. I would seriously recommend Welbutrin instead. It has little to no side effects and studies show basically no effect on libido (sex drive). Also very effective on depression. I can also tell you from personal experience - NO sex while on SSRI's, TONS of sex on Welbutrin - best of both worlds!
Good luck!!

k9trainingbiz

Also, Demeter
If your depression is that severe, which it sounds serious, I sincerely hope you are seeing a PSYCHIATRIST, not a family doc. Only professionals know how to treat different types of depression - yes there are many types of it. One pill won't usually do the trick. Did you mean dysthymia? have you been diagnosed bipolar perhaps?

Demeter

I've been on prozac, zoloft, paxil & celexa. I'm on effexor xr.
Welbutrin is my last resort & I think my psychiatrist was saving it in case nothing else works. For now its making sure I have KY handy (God, I thought I'd be 50 before I needed that, how embarrasing) and just dealing with the fact my boyfriend is lucky to get some twice a week when it used to be twice a day.

Thanks for all the responses. I don't feel so alone now.
I definatley can't tolerate this much longer...I'll have to ask my Doc to switch me.

Demeter

I see a psychiatrist at least once a month. Bipolar? No. I just seem to manage okay without meds for periods. (usually 6 months to 2 years). Now I wonder why I go off the meds at all.

StanT

That sounds very close to my wife's symptoms. After years of being treated for depression, her doctors suspected bipolar and changed her medication. The problem was, that the doctors would never see her when she was up, only when she was down. The various depression medications turned her into a walking functional zombie. No depression, but no desire to do anything but cope, either. She would take her medication when she was down and not when she was up. Going at it from a bipolar perspective switched her medications yet again and got her to a point where things leveled out. No highs, no lows. She's been on the same medications for a couple of years and things are doing well, now.

I'd really have another talk with your psychiatrist and perhaps get a second opinion. From what I can tell, this isn't a very exact science, it's more trial and error.

absorbentishe

My wife was on Paxil for a while, her doctor perscribed some steroid lotion to put on her leg, to help get her in the mood. Worked like a charm.

stevew

I know that there are meds that can return your sex drive back. My girlfriend had very low sex drive. But when she started taking Sentia pills her libido become normal. Maybe it can help you too.

RGHoskins26

.......it'll get better. I take some pretty potent sedatives and once your body adjusts, you'll be humping legs again in no time.......hang in there

iamnormal

I had zero libidio when on effexor. I'm on lexapro and welbutrin and at around 50% libidio. I didn't mind not haveing any drive.
Has effexor given you the brain shivers yet? It's the strangest feeling.

jhkayakr

Doctors say a good exercise program while being on anti-depressants can do wonders for low-libidio. Generally, exercise will increase endorphin production in the brain which can off set the chemical imbalance that can cause certain types of depression. Nothing major, just low level exercise 3 or 4 times a week. The endorphin release has been documented to increase sex hormone production thus boosting one's lidido. Spending time in the sun doesn't hurt either. I found this information in Life Extension magazine.

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........gotta need for speed....

MageB420666

effexor lowers libido?

Geez, my gf is on that AND birth control pills, no wonder she has no sex drive...

And I mean NO sex drive, she never wants to do it....

__________________
Apathy: The best outlook this side of I don't give a damn.

snowy

I was on Celexa for about two years...if it was meant to lower my libido during that time it certainly did not.

But Demeter, I know how you feel about going on and off medication. I made it through this winter without it and it was nearly impossible. During the rest of the year I can deal with my depression...during the winter it's just so much worse. One of my biggest symptoms of depression is a lack of motivation and general apathy--and looking at these last few months I know I need to go back on the medication. It saddens me; I'd really hoped to go without. But I can't do it.

And it sucks because in four months I lose my prescription drug benefit.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

lindseylatch

Brain shivers??? Good god, no! I've never heard of that...

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snowy

Oooh, boy, I used to get terrible dizzy spells if I forgot to take my Celexa on time...when I weaned off of the medicine I had the roughest time. Eek. Not pleasant.

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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Carno

Maybe I'm missing something, but if birth control decreases your libido, why not change the birth control? Do you have to take the same type of birth control for a certain amount of time or something?

I mean, if you take birth control so you don't get pregnant, but when you're on birth control you never have sex, then what's the point? The solution seems glaringly obvious to me, but maybe there's something I don't know..

flamingdog

How marked is this change? I just got precribed a 10mg dose of SSRI and reduced sexual appetite is tantamount to carving my personality out of me. I'd rather be depressed than a shell.

Demeter

Follow up - I've been off of Effexor for two months. It was hell the first 3 weeks, weaning myself off. I was naseous, dizzy and achy.
Now its al behind me & my sex drive & steadily improving!

__________________

I am not bound to please thee with my answers.
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Demeter

It wasn't the birth control that decreased the libido, it was the antidepressant

__________________

I am not bound to please thee with my answers.
William Shakespeare

Sage

Remember, Duke University released a study not too long ago that found that exercise was just as effective at treating depression as drugs- and it makes you feel better about yourself- which means your libido is even bigger! Glad to know you feel better!

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angeltek

My Wife was suffering those same problems. It took a few months for her to have any sexual drive back. She would often say that the thought of sex made her feel like curling up in a ball. I assume that overtime and as your body adjusts to the medication that you will eventually regain the desire to have sex again.

getwonk'd

I started effexor about two years ago, right after my son was born. I fell into PPD really bad. Couldn't do anything. Doctor was going to put me back in the hospital. Effexor did the trick. I'm on 225mg daily. I've suffered with clinical depression for 11 years now, although the PPd was different and much more scary. Anyway, back to the subject at hand, I thought I had no labido because I was tired (4 kids now, five when he was born, cooking, cleaning, taxi service, taking care of others kids, and all the other joys of motherhood.)

woOt?

I'm starting lexapro today. Have you tried horny goat weed ?

Vincentt

I was on a antidepressant a while back(effexor)... and it really messed with me.
I didn't even think about sex at all!
I also had some 'weird' throughts, and overall didn't like the 'feeling' it was giving me.

I stoped taking it, and had some bad reactions for stoping so quickly.

For the people on Lexapro, what are the bad side-effects? I heard most people gained a great deal of weight when on it.

My doctor wrote me a script for it... But I just never started taking it.

I really would rather be depressed in my right mind.. then in the middle-soul-less world of antidepressants.

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Grasshopper Green

I'm on lexapro, and I had quite a few side effects at the beginning, which is odd from what my doctor told me; she said it tends to have fewer side effects than other anti-depressants. At first I had acne, headaches, nausea, hot flashes, and strangely enough, gas. I didn't really gain any weight on it, perhaps a couple of pounds. They have all subsided though; the only remaining effect is a lowered libido, which has been steadily increasing since I took it. It's not at 100% right now, but before I was on the meds, I had absolutely none, so it's helped me as far as that is concerned.

__________________
"They say that patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings; steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and they make you king"

Formerly Medusa

kbickham

i USED to have about the strongest libido on the PLANET. hey i'm new here. I've been on and off zoloft for about 8 years now, and at first it didn't effect my sex drive, just ability to climax. last summer in the pursuit of weight lifting i used a supplement 1ad (rael long story/take to long to explain what it is, but it is now illgeal)...and it PERMANENTLY damaged my libido. after 4-5 months it seemed as if my libido had come back to somewhat normal levels. While I do attribute alot of this to the stressed i dealt with from a roguh breakup out of a 2 year relationship, resulting in a spurt of alcoholism (im in college)... i no longer have a sex drive. I had been off my zoloft for quite some time (however have been switched back to ritalin in the begining of the semester), and I no longer have a sex drive. I tired getting BACK on my zoloft, as I thought it may be due to depression, but it is not helping. Bein a 20 year old (and it sounds cocky....but there is the constant arising situation that would ned me to perform sexually...heh but i CAN'T. This is probaly the worst thing I have ever experienced...and do NOT no what to do. Anyone.... any advice would be GREATLY apreciated

pan6467

Be very careful detoxing yourself off most anti-depressants (Not sure about Effexor) because most (Xanax, Paxil, Klonopin, Qualudes, Valium, Diazepam, chlorozopam, flourozopam, etc) are from the drug family Benzodiazipine.

Anywho, Benzos have this neat way of building up in your body and if on them long enough then going cold turkey can KILL YOU. There are only 2 drugs that are dangerous enough to kill in a cold turkey detoxing situation, Benzos and alcohol (heroin and cocaine usually make you just wish for death).

Benzos by far are the worst as they take weeks sometimes months (depending on length taking them) to detox off of and as mentioned cold turkey can kill you very fast or slowly.... never detox without a Dr. knowing.

Back to topic, my wife.... well ex wife had/has the same problems, and the loss of sex drive did affect and effectively destroyed our marriage. To me what was the purpose of being married if my wife didn't want to have sex or when we would act as if she had no desire and just laid there. Before the drugs she was wild and very good in bed pleasing and wanting to be pleased.

I do love the new Wellbutrin ads that say probably 20 times in their commercials "no or very low sexual side effects". I do know my Dr. suggested Wellbutrin as a smoking cessation drug.... it must be a wonder drug.

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I just love people who use the excuse "I use/do this because I LOVE the feeling/joy/happiness it brings me" and expect you to be ok with that as you watch them destroy their life blindly following. My response is, "I like to put forks in an eletrical socket, just LOVE that feeling, can't ever get enough of it, so will you let me put this copper fork in that electric socket?"