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Old 11-02-2004, 11:36 PM   #1 (permalink)
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A high school dilemna

First of all, I'm in high school so I realize that this problem sounds immensely trivial. Yet, I still ask for any advice as I hope to gain experience as to what pathways I have open in the future and get to see different perspectives on the situation. Oh, and this is my first post, though I've lurked for a while, so don't hate on me too bad if I sound a little stupid

Well, I suppose i should lay out my story and see what you guys have to say so here it goes:

I've known this girl for a while now, maybe 4 or 5 years, and I guess you can say we've had a mutual "friendship". I've gone in and out of phases of liking her and judging by different signs, she has gone in and out of phases of liking me.

At the point when school started though, it was comfortable between us and there were no feelings. As school progressed, she started to initialize conversation and go out of her way to be around me, at least from the views of our peers. I didn't really think anything of it, but as she started to come on to me more and more, i started to develop feelings for her as well. Something started to develop between us, even though I never stated it. Yet when I started to show the slightest inkling of fondness towards her, she shunned me and started badmouthing about me to our whole congregation we hang out with.

So as I've thought it out and here's what my possibilities are so far:
1) If I flat out tell her I never liked her in the first place, from here on after it would probably become awkward whenever she is around. The problem is I see her a lot in class and just when hanging out with friends.

2) If I just leave it alone, not only does it get uncomfortable around her, but with what she's spreading to her friends, it'll get uncomfortable around people I've known for a long time who are closer to her.

3) This whole thing between us has been a facade in my mind, though my peers and her peers have said otherwise. Who knows, maybe she's never liked me in the first place, in which case I have more to learn than I once thought.

4) Maybe High school girls are just weird

5) She's been playing me, though this has lasted a while with her just coming on to me, and myself not showing signs of interest.

At this moment, that's how it stands, and it just seems like I should take the lesser of the loss. I do see how insignificant this little problem is and how much I'm probably overanalyzing, but in this area of experience concerning the other sex, I'm rather short-handed. For this, I ask you guys as to what you can say about relations concerning these types of problems, and relations in general. At this point, I'm just looking to learn and gain first-hand knowledge about this type of stuff, and I was wondering which pathway might benefit me the most so later I won't have to think so much about these types of problems.

Well, I appreciate any feedback I might get, thanks.

Last edited by Diuretica; 11-02-2004 at 11:42 PM..
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Old 11-03-2004, 01:48 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Sorry I don't have time for a super long response but I don't even think this needs one.

This girl is just a silly high school girl that doesn't know what she wants. Forget about her, be cool with the rest of your friends, don't spread rumors about her or force them to side with her. Just be cool with your friends, ignore the shit she does and everyone else will too. She's acting silly because she's nervous and doesn't know how to respond to all this in a more mature way.

Whether she's not showing her true colors or not doesn't matter. Move on, live a crazy high school life and meet lots of people, stick with your friends and they'll put her in her place if they can see she's acting stupid.

Edit: Just to be a bit more specific, don't tell her you don't like her anymore, don't tell her you never did, don't tell her you don't want to be friends. Don't do anything like that. If she asks you just say that everything's cool now and that you can see it wouldn't work out, keep her in the group because they're her friends too, and I bet she'll chill out soon enough.

Last edited by Rlyss; 11-03-2004 at 01:50 AM..
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Old 11-03-2004, 07:54 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Atlanta, GA
Yeah, high school girls are stupid. Then again, high school boys are just as stupid. What does this mean really? That whatever happens in high school is pointless and doesn't really add up to anything meaningfull. Now this doesn't apply in all cases, but most of the time it does. High school sucks and so do most of the kids in them.
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Old 11-03-2004, 02:33 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Cumming, GA
Here is what I would do.

Be as nice to her as possible. Take her out to dinner, buy her flowers, and just try to get her to like you for who you are. She is a high school girl with high school emotions. Trust me, she will like the attention. Basically, shower her with attention, and she will grow to like you.

HAHAHAHAHA.. I can't even finish this without laughing out loud. Ok, I will be serious now.

Take her to a party, buy some beer and talk to her like she is the most important thing in the world. Then get a blowjob and forget about her. There are more than likely 500 other girls in that school that you need to score with before you graduate.

The only way you will remember her name in 5 years is if you knock her up and have to pay her child support. So, get a blowjob. Safer that way. Only polish girls can get pregnant from blowjobs.
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Old 11-03-2004, 02:44 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Forget it, move on, grow up.

End of story.
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Old 11-03-2004, 03:25 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Maybe she got frustrated because she liked you for a long time and you didn't show any emotions towards her. She was probably sending out signals for a long time and you just didn't pick up on them, so she got annoyed and is now shunning you.

Don't feel bad though, most women send out signals that no human male can pick up on. It's like a dog whistle: she may be blowing as hard as she can, but your ears stills don't hear it.

Be upfront about it with her and tell her you like her. Either she will say she's over you, or she will say she likes you also.

Or you can just pine and fret in silence.
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Old 11-03-2004, 03:46 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Location: California
Quote:
Originally Posted by theburner
Here is what I would do.

Be as nice to her as possible. Take her out to dinner, buy her flowers, and just try to get her to like you for who you are. She is a high school girl with high school emotions. Trust me, she will like the attention. Basically, shower her with attention, and she will grow to like you.

HAHAHAHAHA.. I can't even finish this without laughing out loud. Ok, I will be serious now.

Take her to a party, buy some beer and talk to her like she is the most important thing in the world. Then get a blowjob and forget about her. There are more than likely 500 other girls in that school that you need to score with before you graduate.

The only way you will remember her name in 5 years is if you knock her up and have to pay her child support. So, get a blowjob. Safer that way. Only polish girls can get pregnant from blowjobs.
there you go my friend.
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Old 11-03-2004, 03:49 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: 13th century Europe
Quote:
Originally Posted by Diuretica
4) Maybe High school girls are just weird
There ya go.
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Old 11-03-2004, 04:36 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: ..too close for comfort..
maybe girls are just weird period. *gives creepy stare and sulks away*
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Old 11-03-2004, 08:31 PM   #10 (permalink)
Insane
 
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Location: Saskatchewan
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rlyss
Sorry I don't have time for a super long response but I don't even think this needs one.

This girl is just a silly high school girl that doesn't know what she wants. Forget about her, be cool with the rest of your friends, don't spread rumors about her or force them to side with her. Just be cool with your friends, ignore the shit she does and everyone else will too. She's acting silly because she's nervous and doesn't know how to respond to all this in a more mature way.

Whether she's not showing her true colors or not doesn't matter. Move on, live a crazy high school life and meet lots of people, stick with your friends and they'll put her in her place if they can see she's acting stupid.

Edit: Just to be a bit more specific, don't tell her you don't like her anymore, don't tell her you never did, don't tell her you don't want to be friends. Don't do anything like that. If she asks you just say that everything's cool now and that you can see it wouldn't work out, keep her in the group because they're her friends too, and I bet she'll chill out soon enough.
Sounds like sage advice to me.
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Old 11-03-2004, 11:51 PM   #11 (permalink)
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From my experience in high school here is a general advice:

Just take it easy and stop getting so worked up about everything. People always try to make their life like soap operas, but they're not, relax.

As for the girl, it seems to me that if she's just spreading rumors and shit about you for no genuine reason then just stop helping her out. Still talk to her and stuff, but don't give her the time of day if she doesn't show you the respect you seem to deserve. If she apologizes then it's a different situation, but from my point of view she definitely seems very immature and immature people will only bring you trouble.
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