emphant

Now, normally I have no trouble meeting girls or anything, so don't get me wrong. But tonight I went to a dance club for the first time. Lucky for me, I went with two female friends and danced with them. But for when I go without them, how do you approach girls ?

I mean to dance, mostly, not so much to talk. I'm thinkingit's probably the obvious "Hi, want to dance?" but perhaps there is some stuff I don't know. Thanks for your help.

arch13

Actually, I've found that women love a man confident enough to dance. When i go to clubs without my SO, i just get on the floor and dance while the majority of men stand arounf the dance floor and bar insisting that "They don't dance".
It doesn't take long before women start bumping against me on the floor when 5 minutes ago there was several feet of distance between us. Quite frankly, don't ask to dance. get on the floor, dance, and if and when a young lady bumps into you or seems to be checking you out in close proximity, dance with her.
It's the most terrifying thing in the world to just move over to a girl near you on the dance floor and start dancing with her as opposed to near her, but it's that fear that keeps all the other guys at bay by the bar.
The last time i attended a club here, i remember that about 15 minutes after i got on the floor and started dancing alone, a young lady kept bumping into me while dancing with her freinds. The next time she bumped into me i put my arm around her waist and turned her around to face me.
The fear that she's going to scream "Ewww don't touch me" scares guys, but for the most part girls are so happy to have someone to dance with (as i think you are as well) that they'll be more than happy to dance as long as your not fresh.
Just be confident in yourself and look for a dance partner, not a date or lay. Girls can damned well figure if it's a nice guy or someone trying to get in their pants.
Just go to dance, and if something happens then something happpens. Don't plan on it or look for it. Just enjoy yourself.

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tisonlyi

...And more often than not, when you go out in search of nothing, you come home with a lot more than you went out for...

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Sleepyjack

arch13 has coverd it nicely; well that's what i do

i also posted a similar topic a while back that you might want to check out? here

skysooner

Just don't pick a girl to dance next to that has a boyfriend

Great advice. If I were still single, I would try it out.

Parker

Confidence is the key. I agree with arch13 100%. Also, when she looks like she is getting thirsty. Ask her to come with you to get a drink at the bar. DO NOT LEAVE HER ON THE DANCE FLOOR because you might turn around and she is dancing with someone else. Good Luck.

Seaver

I know for a fact that women hate this 90% of the time. Good advice on the dancing and keeping an eye on women who break the contact barrier though.

Me personally I love to dance, but I guess I'm too much of a Southern gentileman to just start dancing with anyone. If you see a girl who's giving you the eye DONT look away right away, hold it for 2 more seconds. She'll smile, look down, and look back at you if she's interested, when she looks back and you're still looking at her go for it, just ask her to dance. Just dont be that guy who sits for 5 min staring at her, it'll weird her out. When you make your approach hold eye contact and give a small smile, reach out your hand like a gentileman and lead her to the dance floor. Quiet confidence is the way to go IMO, just dancing up on people who havent even given their approval just isnt something I could do.

Truly

Yes, yes, and YES! Very smart words, there, Seaver! I'm also one of those girls, though, that wouldn't really mind it if a guy just started dancing with me, as long as he wasn't rough or fresh about it.

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Strange Famous

Just get on the dance floor and dance near them?

I have no clue really, clubs like that just make me want to drink myself stupid

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bonehed1

Just get out there and slowly make your way to the girl....works for me

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grouchie

um
before dancing with anyone
line up a few drinks
after a few drinks and yer felling well and less self confident, just start dancing
Most people are there to dance and aren't going to mind if you dance with them.

this has been my experience and i'm a fat lazy white guy who can't dance
but with a few in me, i still can't dance, but i'm trying to pretend anyways and haven't gotten pushed away or laughed at yet

KungFuGuy

go breakin! oh wait...nm... breakers usually go breakin' to break.

learning some basic steps that you can do to differant styles of music can help out a lot to.

personally i want to learn how to swing dance cause it looks like a lot of fun. especially those ppl that practice together so they know what they're doing. I imagine it'd be hard to do anything complicated with someone u just met.

mbchills

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Truly

Swing is TONS of fun! But yeah, it is hard to swing with someone you haven't danced with before... unless that someone is a good follower. The really complicated stuff shouldn't be done, anyway, if you haven't practiced. I mean, I'm a decent swing dancer, used to dance a lot, actually, and there was not a CHANCE that I'd let some random guy toss me around.

Try taking a few classes in your area. They shouldn't be too hard to find!

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Seaver

Haha, see?

Think of it as the primal ways, when two animals make eye contact the one to look away first gives in. Easily 90% of guys look away before the women, shying away. Holding eye contact is one of the most immediate and powerful signs of confidence.

And yes, learn to dance. I can do everything but that techno crap, 2-step/salsa/swing/booty, I can do pretty much everything and yes it impress not only the girl you're dancing with, but the vast majority of the girls there WILL notice and will jump on the first chance they will have when you're alone. Swing and 2-step are probably the hardest with a new partner, but the ones that can keep up with you.. well... it's true what they say... take my word on it.

StormBerlin

I went to a crowded club just the other night. I went with my SO, one of my girlfriends and her SO and a few other friends. My girlfriend and I were the only girls. These random guys just kept coming up to us and trying to dance with us. My best advice is don't just go up to some random girl at a club. If she's cute, watch her for a while and she who she came with (We never left our boyfriends farther than four feet and we still had to keep shutting them down, even after they saw us with our boyfriends). Don't ever just get up behind her and start grinding, its so tasteless and it just freaks girls out.

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motdakasha

Look for obvious eye contact with a girl. Approach her. (How you go about that is your business.)

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minyn

here's one thing NOT TO DO:
Dont just walk up from behind and start grinding on her without her seeing you. Ive shoved off many guys who have done that, a few of which i may have given a chance under better cirucumstances of their approach.

However, i dont pick up guys at clubs. i go to dance. watch out for my kind, youll be able to spot them

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iAmSpartacus

So true... It's sick when guys do that... I usually go to clubs with female friends (its easier, so you always have some to dance with) and then occasionally get grinded by strangers and I have to look out for that

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iAmSpartacus

I don't know if this works, but my friend swears by it, walk up to a girl near the bar and ask her if she wants to take a shot with you (you pay of course), then ask her to dance.

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