Intercourse Troubles :( - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

meff · 10-22-2003, 05:15 PM

Here's my problem:

Sure, the couch, the floor, anywhere, any other sexual act.. I can get it up and keep it up just fine. On the bed, before I start or when I begin intercourse, I lose it.

Now, granted she's been tighter lately due to a yeast infection we've cleared up, I don't know who's problem this is.

Anyways, I've already checked all of my med side effects, so it's not those. It's not stress, we're doing fine right now. So, I don't know what the hell is up, it wasn't like this about 3 days ago.

I'm kinda mystified why this is happening, but it's not mental or stress or med side effects.. so.. what else would cause this? It's not kiddo problems or worries, shes on Depo..

Help, please?

MacGnG · 10-22-2003, 05:18 PM

dont do it on the bed!

but seriously tho, just try anything...
pillows under you? might help

Averett · 10-22-2003, 05:30 PM

Sounds kinda mental to me....

You do it in all sorts of other "unsual" places, maybe somewhere in the back of your head you think that having sex on the bed will be boring and bland.

meff · 10-22-2003, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Averett
Sounds kinda mental to me....

You do it in all sorts of other "unsual" places, maybe somewhere in the back of your head you think that having sex on the bed will be boring and bland.

Hrmm. I don't think so.. I rather enjoy sex on the bed

Mostly in other places we do other sex-related things but not intercourse much..

analog · 10-23-2003, 12:50 AM

Sounds mostly mental to me too. And maybe because you're only really doing non-intercourse things in other places in the house, you're not noticing it there, too.

And you know what? Maybe she is a bit tighter. If you've been with her long at all, you could VERY easily tell even a small difference in tightness, and it really could throw off your game. And if it's only been a few days, it's not even anything to worry about. Shit like that happens. Has anything in your diet changed? More/less of anything, or different foods? Don't let it bother you, it should correct itself. Let us know, and good luck!

skysooner · 10-23-2003, 05:34 AM

Analog has it right. This is mostly mental. When my wife is coming off her period, she is not only a bit tighter, but a bit dryer. I'm fully aware that sex can hurt her during this if we don't take it slow and careful. This admittedly throws me off my game a bit as I'm a bit concerned about whether she is enjoying it, and I can lose my erection if I'm not fully aroused. The way we have found around it is to really stretch out foreplay. This has two benefits. First, she gets over her dry problems pretty easily, and two, I'm so turned on that I'm not about to lose my erection.

Yeast infections can cause dryness, and it just may be that you can physically tell this and it worries/bothers you on some level. Try extra foreplay and see if that helps.

Sapper · 10-23-2003, 07:30 AM

The VAST majority of sexual dysfunction in men is psychological in nature.

Shyla Loral · 10-23-2003, 01:48 PM

OH, believe me, it's NOT him!! He's as hard as ever. I'm just tight, and have been for about 3 days, which is really frustrating. Foreplay loosens me up a little bit, but not much. He can spoo just fine. We use lots of lube (astroglide gel, nice and thick).
I've never had this problem before. It's really annoying. I don't think it's stress, because I've been under much more stress at other times in my life (living with someone then I had sex with only like 6 times a year) and it still hadn't happened.
So don't know. We will try places other than the bed, and will get back to you.
In the meantime if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. :P

mistered · 10-23-2003, 02:09 PM

I think the chances are good that it happened once for whatever reason and now it has gotten in your head. Just stop thinking about the connection.

raeanna74 · 10-23-2003, 03:57 PM

OK so if he's hard and she's just too tight - could it be the position you choose when you are in bed and you choose other positions when elsewhere? Try to find a position where her pussy's more open maybe?

Could it by psycho for him because of the discovery of the yeasties may have occured in the bed? Just brainstorming?

GoldenOuroboros · 10-24-2003, 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shyla Loral
We will try places other than the bed, and will get back to you.

Yes please do.. this would definetly clear up a few things. If he's fine anywhere else and then goes limp on the bed.. then there's psychological issues there.. mostly things such as stress can cause this.

As others have stated that when the get concerned about whether or not their partner is being pleasured or might be feeling pain they worry (stress) about it then lose their erection. This has happened to me to on several occasions.

Don't worry about it. These things pass

Cause if you do worry about it... it adds to the problem...

Shyla Loral · 10-24-2003, 07:57 AM

Well, a couple of interesting things since last I posted. The only thing we were doing differently was that we has switched from astroglide liquid to astroglide gel. We looked on the ingredients, and there's some sort of sodium in there that can change the ph of the vagina. I talked to my pharmacist who said some women are irritated by that. So we ditched the gel and bought the liquid. The other development is that it's isn't necessarily that I'm swollen it's that I am a lot shallower than normal. when playing around with a dildo to see how far it can go in, it's like 2 inches, and then I squeeze without intending to, and it shoots it out. Exactly the same thing I am doing to his penis.
So, for some reason, I am much shallower in the vagina than normal. Any ideas? I'zz confused.
Thanks xxoo
shyla

numist · 10-24-2003, 07:59 AM

that is very, very strange... I would ask your gyno about that, 2 inches is very shallow, especially when you are excited...

ismark · 10-24-2003, 02:13 PM

is it possible there is a residual effect from the sodium that might take a little time to wear off.

You mentioned a yeast infection, is it possible things are a bit swollen up there still?

Shyla Loral · 10-24-2003, 05:47 PM

**grr* I don't know. Today things are the same I am starting to have a bit of hesitation with urination as well, so I don't know if the two things are related? I am making a dr appt for next week, if it's not better by then I'll go.
I want a normal, functioning pussy dammit! :P

Esen · 10-24-2003, 06:03 PM

Only thing I can say that might help os..
Havefun trying, don t get fustrated, just keep at it and have fun in the mean time

Shyla Loral · 10-24-2003, 11:20 PM

We did it!!!! woohoo!!!! honk honk wheeeeeee Thanks for all the advice :P We just spontaneously started foolin around, and it worked. We didn't have any expectations, I just pounced on him, and one thing led to another. *whew* I know we're not necessarily out of the woods, but whoa boy!

meff · 10-25-2003, 04:38 PM

Yep, we're back on track...
No idea what caused this bout of confusion, though.. But for now it's gone and that's what counts.

Thanks everyone

analog · 10-26-2003, 01:48 AM

Good to see you're on the mend. The only thing is, if you were using the gel before you had these problems, then the gel is not the source of your problem. It may, however, have become a problem once you had other things going on, i.e. yeast infection. With all of these things going on, it's no wonder you're swollen to all hell and back- and on top of the extra dryness, the pH imbalance, and the residual effects from the infection, you're having sex, which will add greatly to irritation if the chief problem is dryness (regardless of the use of lube- it's still moving in there). I think you're going to find out you're just all swollen on the inside from all these things. I hate to say it, but perhaps a day or two of abstaining from vaginal intercourse would be wise, just to let it heal up? Just a thought. Good luck!

10-22-2003, 05:15 PM	#1 (permalink)
meff Vanishing, like I do.. Location: Austin, TX	Intercourse Troubles :( Here's my problem: Sure, the couch, the floor, anywhere, any other sexual act.. I can get it up and keep it up just fine. On the bed, before I start or when I begin intercourse, I lose it. Now, granted she's been tighter lately due to a yeast infection we've cleared up, I don't know who's problem this is. Anyways, I've already checked all of my med side effects, so it's not those. It's not stress, we're doing fine right now. So, I don't know what the hell is up, it wasn't like this about 3 days ago. I'm kinda mystified why this is happening, but it's not mental or stress or med side effects.. so.. what else would cause this? It's not kiddo problems or worries, shes on Depo.. Help, please? __________________ Toy-like people make me boy-like.

10-22-2003, 05:30 PM	#3 (permalink)
Averett Is In Love Location: I'm workin' on it	Sounds kinda mental to me.... You do it in all sorts of other "unsual" places, maybe somewhere in the back of your head you think that having sex on the bed will be boring and bland. __________________ Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

10-23-2003, 07:30 AM	#7 (permalink)
Sapper Insane Location: The Internet	The VAST majority of sexual dysfunction in men is psychological in nature. __________________ rm -f /bin/laden

10-23-2003, 01:48 PM	#8 (permalink)
Shyla Loral Crazy Location: Austin	OH, believe me, it's NOT him!! He's as hard as ever. I'm just tight, and have been for about 3 days, which is really frustrating. Foreplay loosens me up a little bit, but not much. He can spoo just fine. We use lots of lube (astroglide gel, nice and thick). I've never had this problem before. It's really annoying. I don't think it's stress, because I've been under much more stress at other times in my life (living with someone then I had sex with only like 6 times a year) and it still hadn't happened. So don't know. We will try places other than the bed, and will get back to you. In the meantime if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. :P __________________ "Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac. Meff r0x

10-23-2003, 03:57 PM	#10 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	OK so if he's hard and she's just too tight - could it be the position you choose when you are in bed and you choose other positions when elsewhere? Try to find a position where her pussy's more open maybe? Could it by psycho for him because of the discovery of the yeasties may have occured in the bed? Just brainstorming? __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

10-22-2003, 05:18 PM	#2 (permalink)
MacGnG Know Where!	dont do it on the bed! but seriously tho, just try anything... pillows under you? might help

10-23-2003, 12:50 AM	#5 (permalink)
analog Banned	Sounds mostly mental to me too. And maybe because you're only really doing non-intercourse things in other places in the house, you're not noticing it there, too. And you know what? Maybe she is a bit tighter. If you've been with her long at all, you could VERY easily tell even a small difference in tightness, and it really could throw off your game. And if it's only been a few days, it's not even anything to worry about. Shit like that happens. Has anything in your diet changed? More/less of anything, or different foods? Don't let it bother you, it should correct itself. Let us know, and good luck!

10-23-2003, 05:34 AM	#6 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	Analog has it right. This is mostly mental. When my wife is coming off her period, she is not only a bit tighter, but a bit dryer. I'm fully aware that sex can hurt her during this if we don't take it slow and careful. This admittedly throws me off my game a bit as I'm a bit concerned about whether she is enjoying it, and I can lose my erection if I'm not fully aroused. The way we have found around it is to really stretch out foreplay. This has two benefits. First, she gets over her dry problems pretty easily, and two, I'm so turned on that I'm not about to lose my erection. Yeast infections can cause dryness, and it just may be that you can physically tell this and it worries/bothers you on some level. Try extra foreplay and see if that helps.

10-23-2003, 02:09 PM	#9 (permalink)
mistered Tilted	I think the chances are good that it happened once for whatever reason and now it has gotten in your head. Just stop thinking about the connection.

10-24-2003, 07:57 AM	#12 (permalink)
Shyla Loral Crazy Location: Austin	Well, a couple of interesting things since last I posted. The only thing we were doing differently was that we has switched from astroglide liquid to astroglide gel. We looked on the ingredients, and there's some sort of sodium in there that can change the ph of the vagina. I talked to my pharmacist who said some women are irritated by that. So we ditched the gel and bought the liquid. The other development is that it's isn't necessarily that I'm swollen it's that I am a lot shallower than normal. when playing around with a dildo to see how far it can go in, it's like 2 inches, and then I squeeze without intending to, and it shoots it out. Exactly the same thing I am doing to his penis. So, for some reason, I am much shallower in the vagina than normal. Any ideas? I'zz confused. Thanks xxoo shyla __________________ "Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac. Meff r0x

10-24-2003, 07:59 AM	#13 (permalink)
numist Banned Location: UCSD, 510.49 miles from my love	that is very, very strange... I would ask your gyno about that, 2 inches is very shallow, especially when you are excited...

10-24-2003, 02:13 PM	#14 (permalink)
ismark Crazy Location: Sydney	is it possible there is a residual effect from the sodium that might take a little time to wear off. You mentioned a yeast infection, is it possible things are a bit swollen up there still? __________________ The Grumpy Old Bloke

10-24-2003, 05:47 PM	#15 (permalink)
Shyla Loral Crazy Location: Austin	*grr I don't know. Today things are the same I am starting to have a bit of hesitation with urination as well, so I don't know if the two things are related? I am making a dr appt for next week, if it's not better by then I'll go. I want a normal, functioning pussy dammit! :P __________________ "Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac. Meff r0x

10-24-2003, 06:03 PM	#16 (permalink)
Esen TFPer formaly known as Chauncey Location: North East	Only thing I can say that might help os.. Havefun trying, don t get fustrated, just keep at it and have fun in the mean time __________________ ~Esen What is everyone doing in my room?

10-24-2003, 11:20 PM	#17 (permalink)
Shyla Loral Crazy Location: Austin	We did it!!!! woohoo!!!! honk honk wheeeeeee Thanks for all the advice :P We just spontaneously started foolin around, and it worked. We didn't have any expectations, I just pounced on him, and one thing led to another. whew I know we're not necessarily out of the woods, but whoa boy! __________________ "Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead" Ben Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanac. Meff r0x

10-25-2003, 04:38 PM	#18 (permalink)
meff Vanishing, like I do.. Location: Austin, TX	Yep, we're back on track... No idea what caused this bout of confusion, though.. But for now it's gone and that's what counts. Thanks everyone __________________ Toy-like people make me boy-like.

10-26-2003, 01:48 AM	#19 (permalink)
analog Banned	Good to see you're on the mend. The only thing is, if you were using the gel before you had these problems, then the gel is not the source of your problem. It may, however, have become a problem once you had other things going on, i.e. yeast infection. With all of these things going on, it's no wonder you're swollen to all hell and back- and on top of the extra dryness, the pH imbalance, and the residual effects from the infection, you're having sex, which will add greatly to irritation if the chief problem is dryness (regardless of the use of lube- it's still moving in there). I think you're going to find out you're just all swollen on the inside from all these things. I hate to say it, but perhaps a day or two of abstaining from vaginal intercourse would be wise, just to let it heal up? Just a thought. Good luck!