She's got a boyfriend.. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Tiger69z · 10-14-2003, 05:02 PM

Lemme tell you my situation:

Last week, i decided to approach this really pretty girl, once that i've been getting signals from actually ie. looking at each other when we pass in the halls, no smile though.

Eitherway last wednesday i thought i'd go for it (i'm a high school student) and approached her while she was sitting down and talking to her friend.

I plopped myself down next to her tapped her on the back and was like.."hi"

she turned around and said "hi" and i introduced myself, used a gentlemanly approach and got her name. It went pretty smooth, however when i tried to ask her for her number she seemed a bit suprised, and then said "i have a boyfriend."

So i said "oh, he a lucky man...i guess i'll cya around, peace."

The thing is, i still kinda want her, and not many girls around school are really worth approaching out of the blue.

What should i do?

Jus leave it be, if she wants me and she breaks up she'll talk to me?

Try to talk to her more?

Try to find another girl?
was i right to approach her outta nowhere?

Eh whatever, if you don't have any advice maybe u can post similar experiences. Heh, i had high hopes too.

Jedbeck · 10-14-2003, 05:17 PM

I think that if you want to you could try and befriend her. This might be a better option because you could always see if she is a person you would really like hanging out with.

Averett · 10-14-2003, 05:19 PM

She has a boyfriend. Be her friend if you like, but just remember the simple fact that she has a boyfriend

foolio7714 · 10-14-2003, 05:19 PM

Good advice...Just be friendly...don't push it.

TinniT · 10-14-2003, 06:12 PM

if you want to be her friend, be her friend. don't ever try to persuade her to do something where you will benefit.

slimshaydee · 10-14-2003, 06:22 PM

Don't forget, some chicks will say they have a boyfriend when they dont as an excuse not to go out with u. I've used the I have a gf before when I havent, it's alot easier and nicer than saying straight up no.

mew · 10-14-2003, 06:52 PM

Personally, I think you did pretty good up until you asked her for her number. You started out soft and friendly, next aggressive and invading. If you ask her for her number its like you want to get into her pants. If you want to ask her out..ask her out without any pressure. Like:

"Do you and (her friend(s) ) want to come out with me and my friends to TimHortons (or any reg. hang out spot..even a mall so you have other stuff do distract yourslef if she gets too uncomfy)after school?"
If she says: I have a bf
all you have to say is: Well, thats cool, but if you want to bring him too that'd b awsome OR Thats cool, but if ever you want to hang out with us some time, the offers open to you.

That way you tell her your intrested, but if shes unavailable, you leave the option of being a friend. All the while, being friendly and no pressure.
Welll dats just my opinion. Dont put pressure on her or its like your really trying to get in her pants and being ajerk bout it while shes got a man. Making you seem quite the player. Which, I doubt you are.

BentNotTwisted · 10-14-2003, 07:52 PM

First off, congratulations. It takes a lot of courage to go up to a girl in high school and be that direct about asking her out. As others have said, consider working on becoming a friend if that is something you want. Just try to get to know her and let her know you. If she ends up splitting with her bf, you will be there and if she's interested, she will let you know.
Also, don't rule out other girls. Your statement that "not many girls around school are really worth approaching out of the blue" leads me to think you are judging the girls on their surface looks and not their personality. Try to get past the superficial attacments and see some of the other girls for who they are.

The.Lunatic · 10-14-2003, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by BentNotTwisted
First off, congratulations. It takes a lot of courage to go up to a girl in high school and be that direct about asking her out. As others have said, consider working on becoming a friend if that is something you want. Just try to get to know her and let her know you. If she ends up splitting with her bf, you will be there and if she's interested, she will let you know.
Also, don't rule out other girls. Your statement that "not many girls around school are really worth approaching out of the blue" leads me to think you are judging the girls on their surface looks and not their personality. Try to get past the superficial attacments and see some of the other girls for who they are.

She doesn't have a boyfriend, find out who her boyfriend is thats a classic dodge.
Find out who she's going out with, if nobody confront her and let her know that there are better ways of telling someone no.
Then she'll feel bad for you and fuck you that much earlier.

analog · 10-14-2003, 08:38 PM

High school drama. Gotta love it. Jesus man, you're in high school, do whatever makes you feel good- just be safe and smart. You have the whole rest of your adult life to be modest and professional. You're a fucking teenager still, live it!

bermuDa · 10-14-2003, 11:05 PM

make yourself available but don't push the envelope.

arcane · 10-14-2003, 11:19 PM

High school relationships never really last that long. be her friend for the time being, and when the time is right be the guy to help her pick up the pieces.

that's the best part about high school relationships. if someone isn't available...in a few months they will be

Rlyss · 10-15-2003, 02:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by The.Lunatic
She doesn't have a boyfriend, find out who her boyfriend is thats a classic dodge.
Find out who she's going out with, if nobody confront her and let her know that there are better ways of telling someone no.
Then she'll feel bad for you and fuck you that much earlier.

Sorry Lunatic, but I wouldn't advise confronting her about it, or snooping around to see if she <i>really</i> does have a boyfriend.

Whether she has a partner or not isn't what's important, what's important is that if she did want to give you her number, she would have. Simple as that.

If she doesn't really have a boyfriend then it's not your business to find out, and then confront her about it.

She may have said 'I have a boyfriend' but what she <i>said</i> was 'I'm not really interested, sorry.'

Get out there and find yourself a great girlfriend Tiger! There's plenty of fish in the sea, and plenty of girls in high school

mattevil · 10-15-2003, 05:22 AM

ok let me do some decoding here
i have a boyfriens =he has a fist
i'd befriend her and see if you could get her on the rebound though.

Jedbeck · 10-15-2003, 05:31 AM

Some High School relationships last but most of them do not. In my experience, a person just is not ready to go into a completely serious relationship in High school. Now that is not to say that you can't have serious relationships and fall head over heels for a person. All I am saying is that in high school it is like practice dating. More often than not you are looking for Miss or Mr. Right Now and not the person you want to share your life with.

With that said you should go be with people you want and just have fun.

vveronica · 10-15-2003, 08:25 AM

It is possible she is interested but did not want to let her friend she was with to know. the friend might be friends with her boyfriend or even a sister. Idea... When you see her alone give her your number and say, that you find her attractive and you know she has a bfriend but if she would be interested to just give you a call. She might surprise you and say she was only saying it because of her other friend... or not.. but you will know for sure.

tekaweni · 10-15-2003, 11:09 AM

You've signalled your interest clearly enough, now it's her play. If none is forthcoming, well, theres your answer I guess.

Give her a warm smile when you see her and ask her how she's doing etc.

You'll soon see where you stand.

Tiger69z · 10-15-2003, 04:23 PM

Hey guys, thanks for all the advice.

Nothing like feeling loved

Yea, i saw her boyfriend this morning actually, i was rolling up in to the parking lot (in my nice car

) and i saw her holding hands, seemingly intimate with this other blonde guy.

Oh well don't think she was trying to lie and get out of it but i'll take all of your guys's advice to heart.

Thanks again

Oh ya, i saw her in the hallway alone and i was going to wave, but she just avoided any type of eye contact/recognition completely. eep....oh well

EDIT:

ya so that pretty much leads me to believe that she's in a pretty good relationship w/ her boy.

The problem with me is that i'm in the IB program, so in all of my classes i meet the same 46 people, half of which are male. I guess one could say that i should look past the looks factor, but i'd really have to see a girls personality before actually liking them, instead of approaching an so called "ok" girl outta nowhere..."hey babe, you have a nice personality?"

Alright thanks again guys

10-14-2003, 05:02 PM	#1 (permalink)
Tiger69z Banned Location: Sunny S.FLA	She's got a boyfriend.. Lemme tell you my situation: Last week, i decided to approach this really pretty girl, once that i've been getting signals from actually ie. looking at each other when we pass in the halls, no smile though. Eitherway last wednesday i thought i'd go for it (i'm a high school student) and approached her while she was sitting down and talking to her friend. I plopped myself down next to her tapped her on the back and was like.."hi" she turned around and said "hi" and i introduced myself, used a gentlemanly approach and got her name. It went pretty smooth, however when i tried to ask her for her number she seemed a bit suprised, and then said "i have a boyfriend." So i said "oh, he a lucky man...i guess i'll cya around, peace." The thing is, i still kinda want her, and not many girls around school are really worth approaching out of the blue. What should i do? Jus leave it be, if she wants me and she breaks up she'll talk to me? Try to talk to her more? Try to find another girl? was i right to approach her outta nowhere? Eh whatever, if you don't have any advice maybe u can post similar experiences. Heh, i had high hopes too.

10-14-2003, 05:19 PM	#3 (permalink)
Averett Is In Love Location: I'm workin' on it	She has a boyfriend. Be her friend if you like, but just remember the simple fact that she has a boyfriend __________________ Absence is to love what wind is to fire. It extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

10-14-2003, 07:52 PM	#8 (permalink)
BentNotTwisted Optimistic Skeptic Location: Midway between a Beehive and Centennial	First off, congratulations. It takes a lot of courage to go up to a girl in high school and be that direct about asking her out. As others have said, consider working on becoming a friend if that is something you want. Just try to get to know her and let her know you. If she ends up splitting with her bf, you will be there and if she's interested, she will let you know. Also, don't rule out other girls. Your statement that "not many girls around school are really worth approaching out of the blue" leads me to think you are judging the girls on their surface looks and not their personality. Try to get past the superficial attacments and see some of the other girls for who they are. __________________ IS THAT IT ???!!! Do you even know what 'it' is? When the last man dies for just words that he said... We Shall Be Free

10-14-2003, 11:05 PM	#11 (permalink)
bermuDa don't ignore this--> Location: CA	make yourself available but don't push the envelope. __________________ I am the very model of a moderator gentleman.

10-14-2003, 11:19 PM	#12 (permalink)
arcane Insane Location: SLC, UT	High school relationships never really last that long. be her friend for the time being, and when the time is right be the guy to help her pick up the pieces. that's the best part about high school relationships. if someone isn't available...in a few months they will be __________________ <Arcane> so if you banged 2000 chicks then at least one had a pen0r?

10-14-2003, 05:17 PM	#2 (permalink)
Jedbeck Crazy Location: Ohio, USA	I think that if you want to you could try and befriend her. This might be a better option because you could always see if she is a person you would really like hanging out with.

10-14-2003, 05:19 PM	#4 (permalink)
foolio7714 Crazy	Good advice...Just be friendly...don't push it.

10-14-2003, 06:12 PM	#5 (permalink)
TinniT Crazy	if you want to be her friend, be her friend. don't ever try to persuade her to do something where you will benefit.

10-14-2003, 06:22 PM	#6 (permalink)
slimshaydee If you've read this, PM me and say so Location: Sitting on my ass, and you?	Don't forget, some chicks will say they have a boyfriend when they dont as an excuse not to go out with u. I've used the I have a gf before when I havent, it's alot easier and nicer than saying straight up no.

10-14-2003, 06:52 PM	#7 (permalink)
mew Psycho Location: Canada	Personally, I think you did pretty good up until you asked her for her number. You started out soft and friendly, next aggressive and invading. If you ask her for her number its like you want to get into her pants. If you want to ask her out..ask her out without any pressure. Like: "Do you and (her friend(s) ) want to come out with me and my friends to TimHortons (or any reg. hang out spot..even a mall so you have other stuff do distract yourslef if she gets too uncomfy)after school?" If she says: I have a bf all you have to say is: Well, thats cool, but if you want to bring him too that'd b awsome OR Thats cool, but if ever you want to hang out with us some time, the offers open to you. That way you tell her your intrested, but if shes unavailable, you leave the option of being a friend. All the while, being friendly and no pressure. Welll dats just my opinion. Dont put pressure on her or its like your really trying to get in her pants and being ajerk bout it while shes got a man. Making you seem quite the player. Which, I doubt you are.

10-14-2003, 08:38 PM	#10 (permalink)
analog Banned	High school drama. Gotta love it. Jesus man, you're in high school, do whatever makes you feel good- just be safe and smart. You have the whole rest of your adult life to be modest and professional. You're a fucking teenager still, live it!

10-15-2003, 05:22 AM	#14 (permalink)
mattevil Addict Location: Virginia	ok let me do some decoding here i have a boyfriens =he has a fist i'd befriend her and see if you could get her on the rebound though.

10-15-2003, 05:31 AM	#15 (permalink)
Jedbeck Crazy Location: Ohio, USA	Some High School relationships last but most of them do not. In my experience, a person just is not ready to go into a completely serious relationship in High school. Now that is not to say that you can't have serious relationships and fall head over heels for a person. All I am saying is that in high school it is like practice dating. More often than not you are looking for Miss or Mr. Right Now and not the person you want to share your life with. With that said you should go be with people you want and just have fun.

10-15-2003, 08:25 AM	#16 (permalink)
vveronica Psycho Location: northern california	It is possible she is interested but did not want to let her friend she was with to know. the friend might be friends with her boyfriend or even a sister. Idea... When you see her alone give her your number and say, that you find her attractive and you know she has a bfriend but if she would be interested to just give you a call. She might surprise you and say she was only saying it because of her other friend... or not.. but you will know for sure. __________________ ...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight...

10-15-2003, 11:09 AM	#17 (permalink)
tekaweni It wasnt me Location: Scotland	You've signalled your interest clearly enough, now it's her play. If none is forthcoming, well, theres your answer I guess. Give her a warm smile when you see her and ask her how she's doing etc. You'll soon see where you stand. __________________ If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten

10-15-2003, 04:23 PM	#18 (permalink)
Tiger69z Banned Location: Sunny S.FLA	Hey guys, thanks for all the advice. Nothing like feeling loved Yea, i saw her boyfriend this morning actually, i was rolling up in to the parking lot (in my nice car ) and i saw her holding hands, seemingly intimate with this other blonde guy. Oh well don't think she was trying to lie and get out of it but i'll take all of your guys's advice to heart. Thanks again Oh ya, i saw her in the hallway alone and i was going to wave, but she just avoided any type of eye contact/recognition completely. eep....oh well EDIT: ya so that pretty much leads me to believe that she's in a pretty good relationship w/ her boy. The problem with me is that i'm in the IB program, so in all of my classes i meet the same 46 people, half of which are male. I guess one could say that i should look past the looks factor, but i'd really have to see a girls personality before actually liking them, instead of approaching an so called "ok" girl outta nowhere..."hey babe, you have a nice personality?" Alright thanks again guys Last edited by Tiger69z; 10-15-2003 at 04:25 PM..