Experimenting (sp?) - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

IC3 · 10-08-2003, 04:26 PM

This weekend I am probably gonna be spending the whole weekend at a friends house (Fuck Buddy).

She loves the sex, but I am getting kinda bored with it...well not bored, I just wanna try new things.

There is usually very little foreplay before sex...I want her to start initiating more, Be in more control...But I think she likes me doing that.

There are times where we will just tease alittle bit sitting around and sneak off to the bedroom while everybody is partying or whatever...Then we just have sex then return to the party.

It is just straight up sex and nothing more...But she doesn't show any interest in wanting to do any more than just have sex...The last couple times we have been together I have tried new positions and stuff like that...But I want more than just sex.

I am totally attracted to her, she is a very good looking girl...But if she doesn't start taking some control i may stop being with her and go somewhere else.

I don't expect her to do all the work, I just want her to say "Lets do this or lets try this that way" I have proposed watching a porn movie with her and she said she didn't really care...I took that as a no.

So how do i get this chick to get out of the groove we are in of just having the plain old sex that we have every time?

I have mentioned this plenty of times, Missionary style is the only position that gets me off in a couple minutes...I don't know why, But it does. Any other position I can go for so long. So trying new positions is no problem for me...It's usually her on top until she orgams a couple times then we switch to missionary and then it's my turn.

Another thing that bothers me is that when she orgasms she is so quiet...I know when she orgasms cause I notice how much more wet she becomes..And I can feel her vaginal muscles tighten.

Sometimes I feel she is shy and nervous...But she has no problem showing me her body...Not shy about that at all...That is one thing I love.

So how do I get this girl to become more open to new things?

Suggestions please.

toxic515 · 10-08-2003, 04:48 PM

communicate with her! She may be ashamed of some of her thoughts, or think that you will be. My wife is not terribly talkative about what she wants, or what new things we can try, and I found out she thinks it sounds stupid... It's difficult to convince her otherwise.

You might try saying something like: "you know, I really enjoy the time we can get together to play like this... I enjoy the fun we have together. You've been someone that I get to fantasize about doing things with that I don't get to discuss with anyone else..." Something like that should get the conversation going in the direction of "oh really??? What have you thought about?" (here's where you get to talk about things like... I think about you attacking me and ripping my clothes off and spanking me like a red-headed step-child.. or whatever it is you'd like to try... and it's the opportunity to find out what SHE'd like to try as well...

As for being vocal, I finally got past THAT one... one night when I knew she was about ready to hit the big "O" for the first time that night I eased up.... " are you about to come" "well fuck yes, I am".... then say it... tell me.. louder! "you like what I am doing?" tell me! Louder!
a few nights of that and she LIKED telling me... louder..... :-D enjoy! don't piss away a good friendship and fuck buddy when you can easily work through it!

The.Lunatic · 10-08-2003, 05:11 PM

Do to the fact that she is in fact just a fuck buddy this is more difficult, girls get it in their head that they can't go all out with you, because they don't love you that kinda thing. Go get another girl, and when you do stop fucking her, but you don't have to until then.

IC3 · 10-08-2003, 05:30 PM

Actually she has told me that she has strong feelings for me, So I think that she is just kinda nervous about trying new things...But I don't want to be the one that is always proposing new things to do...I want her to take control sometimes.

Otis Floyd · 10-08-2003, 07:16 PM

There's also the distinct possibility (which nobody has mentioned) that she just might not be into the same kinda stuff as you are. Some women really don't want to be aggressive. Others do.

i8one2 · 10-08-2003, 08:34 PM

you bring or tell her to have laid out upon your arrival some general household items.
rope, tape, spoons(wooden, rubber) clothes pins, silk ties, candles etc...whatever you can think of.

When you are ready, have her/you use these items as a way of deversifing your love/playing around time.

toxic515 · 10-09-2003, 05:45 PM

Otis, I agree, but I'd maintain that you still have to communicate to find out. :-)

motdakasha · 10-09-2003, 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by IC3
Actually she has told me that she has strong feelings for me, So I think that she is just kinda nervous about trying new things...But I don't want to be the one that is always proposing new things to do...I want her to take control sometimes.

Perhaps she's afraid if she does anything other than just sex, she won't be able to control her emotions... just a thought.

It could also be that she's submissive/passive and prefers for you to be in control of what's going on in bed.

Communicate.

Lunchbox7 · 10-09-2003, 11:32 PM

You could just tie her up and then you would dictate what happens. It is heaps good. Of course she would have to trust you enough for it. Blind fold her too. That way she cant anticipate what your going to do. Use music and incense to set the mood. Any bet afterwards she will be open to new things. Even if she doesnt want to be tied up again she will probably want to tie you up which is even better. Enjoy mate.

anti fishstick · 10-09-2003, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by motdakasha
Perhaps she's afraid if she does anything other than just sex, she won't be able to control her emotions... just a thought.

It could also be that she's submissive/passive and prefers for you to be in control of what's going on in bed.

Communicate.

i agree with motdakasha. it definately seems like she has some guards up. what with the quiet orgasming and the passivity (or maybe that's just how she is). it's tough to keep things as fuck buddies. constrains the relationship a bit. if you want more experimenting, open the relationship more and communicate.

h45e · 10-10-2003, 01:21 AM

Get her "drunk as a skunk" ;oP

arcane · 10-10-2003, 02:30 AM

put it in the butt

5 words that could possibly change your life

vveronica · 10-10-2003, 07:38 AM

If you want her more vocal then aske her to be I mean wait until she is close to coming and say something like tell me how you feel ..... say it ... tell me.... you tell her As you are doing the same... that should help.

I still think the best is to try a lil bound sex.. But thats me

skysooner · 10-10-2003, 12:43 PM

Yes, you have to communicate. Sometimes it is too strange to talk about it after you are done, so communicate during it. Tell her how good something feels. Don't try too many strange things at once. Take it one step at a time, and you might be amazed at what she will come up with.

10-08-2003, 04:26 PM	#1 (permalink)
IC3 Poison Location: Canada	Experimenting (sp?) This weekend I am probably gonna be spending the whole weekend at a friends house (Fuck Buddy). She loves the sex, but I am getting kinda bored with it...well not bored, I just wanna try new things. There is usually very little foreplay before sex...I want her to start initiating more, Be in more control...But I think she likes me doing that. There are times where we will just tease alittle bit sitting around and sneak off to the bedroom while everybody is partying or whatever...Then we just have sex then return to the party. It is just straight up sex and nothing more...But she doesn't show any interest in wanting to do any more than just have sex...The last couple times we have been together I have tried new positions and stuff like that...But I want more than just sex. I am totally attracted to her, she is a very good looking girl...But if she doesn't start taking some control i may stop being with her and go somewhere else. I don't expect her to do all the work, I just want her to say "Lets do this or lets try this that way" I have proposed watching a porn movie with her and she said she didn't really care...I took that as a no. So how do i get this chick to get out of the groove we are in of just having the plain old sex that we have every time? I have mentioned this plenty of times, Missionary style is the only position that gets me off in a couple minutes...I don't know why, But it does. Any other position I can go for so long. So trying new positions is no problem for me...It's usually her on top until she orgams a couple times then we switch to missionary and then it's my turn. Another thing that bothers me is that when she orgasms she is so quiet...I know when she orgasms cause I notice how much more wet she becomes..And I can feel her vaginal muscles tighten. Sometimes I feel she is shy and nervous...But she has no problem showing me her body...Not shy about that at all...That is one thing I love. So how do I get this girl to become more open to new things? Suggestions please. Last edited by IC3; 10-08-2003 at 04:46 PM..

10-08-2003, 04:48 PM	#2 (permalink)
toxic515 Addict Location: Texas	communicate with her! She may be ashamed of some of her thoughts, or think that you will be. My wife is not terribly talkative about what she wants, or what new things we can try, and I found out she thinks it sounds stupid... It's difficult to convince her otherwise. You might try saying something like: "you know, I really enjoy the time we can get together to play like this... I enjoy the fun we have together. You've been someone that I get to fantasize about doing things with that I don't get to discuss with anyone else..." Something like that should get the conversation going in the direction of "oh really??? What have you thought about?" (here's where you get to talk about things like... I think about you attacking me and ripping my clothes off and spanking me like a red-headed step-child.. or whatever it is you'd like to try... and it's the opportunity to find out what SHE'd like to try as well... As for being vocal, I finally got past THAT one... one night when I knew she was about ready to hit the big "O" for the first time that night I eased up.... " are you about to come" "well fuck yes, I am".... then say it... tell me.. louder! "you like what I am doing?" tell me! Louder! a few nights of that and she LIKED telling me... louder..... :-D enjoy! don't piss away a good friendship and fuck buddy when you can easily work through it! __________________ Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.

10-08-2003, 05:11 PM	#3 (permalink)
The.Lunatic Psycho Location: Somewhere just beyond the realm of sanity...	Do to the fact that she is in fact just a fuck buddy this is more difficult, girls get it in their head that they can't go all out with you, because they don't love you that kinda thing. Go get another girl, and when you do stop fucking her, but you don't have to until then. __________________ Proud memeber of the Insomniac Club.

10-08-2003, 08:34 PM	#6 (permalink)
i8one2 COMPLETED and A TRAINER Location: BEAN_TOWN	you bring or tell her to have laid out upon your arrival some general household items. rope, tape, spoons(wooden, rubber) clothes pins, silk ties, candles etc...whatever you can think of. When you are ready, have her/you use these items as a way of deversifing your love/playing around time. __________________ LEATHER, LATEX and LACE "SSC" "Nothing That Gives Pleasure is Bad" Quality is for those who know what they want and are at peace with what they have. "S/M is about emotion; the erotic tension between my impulse toward something and my resistance against it."-- Virginia Barker

10-09-2003, 05:45 PM	#7 (permalink)
toxic515 Addict Location: Texas	Otis, I agree, but I'd maintain that you still have to communicate to find out. :-) __________________ Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.

10-08-2003, 05:30 PM	#4 (permalink)
IC3 Poison Location: Canada	Actually she has told me that she has strong feelings for me, So I think that she is just kinda nervous about trying new things...But I don't want to be the one that is always proposing new things to do...I want her to take control sometimes.

10-08-2003, 07:16 PM	#5 (permalink)
Otis Floyd Upright	There's also the distinct possibility (which nobody has mentioned) that she just might not be into the same kinda stuff as you are. Some women really don't want to be aggressive. Others do.

10-09-2003, 11:32 PM	#9 (permalink)
Lunchbox7 Addict	You could just tie her up and then you would dictate what happens. It is heaps good. Of course she would have to trust you enough for it. Blind fold her too. That way she cant anticipate what your going to do. Use music and incense to set the mood. Any bet afterwards she will be open to new things. Even if she doesnt want to be tied up again she will probably want to tie you up which is even better. Enjoy mate.

10-10-2003, 01:21 AM	#11 (permalink)
h45e Tilted	Get her "drunk as a skunk" ;oP

10-10-2003, 02:30 AM	#12 (permalink)
arcane Insane Location: SLC, UT	put it in the butt 5 words that could possibly change your life __________________ <Arcane> so if you banged 2000 chicks then at least one had a pen0r?

10-10-2003, 07:38 AM	#13 (permalink)
vveronica Psycho Location: northern california	If you want her more vocal then aske her to be I mean wait until she is close to coming and say something like tell me how you feel ..... say it ... tell me.... you tell her As you are doing the same... that should help. I still think the best is to try a lil bound sex.. But thats me __________________ ...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight...

10-10-2003, 12:43 PM	#14 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	Yes, you have to communicate. Sometimes it is too strange to talk about it after you are done, so communicate during it. Tell her how good something feels. Don't try too many strange things at once. Take it one step at a time, and you might be amazed at what she will come up with.