Anonymous Member

Basically I seem to wind up "connecting" on some level with my lady friends who happen to be dating my other acquaintances/friends.

I don't know if it's in my head but I just sense some wild chemistry between me and this one girl, for example. Her current bf is a big time slacker pot head type and it seems like a really loveless relationship between the 2 of them since he's been bashing her at every opportunity he gets when she's not around, picking up other girls numbers "just in case" and goes out on drinking binges (which I happily join him in from time to time hah) while she's stuck working at her healthcare job.

she's just always giving me the "fuck me" eyes while he sits back completely oblivious eating his fries and staring at the TV

Maybe it's just my own attraction to her that's interpreting events this way, I can't honestly say i'd be any better for her in the long run, but she's just seeming to drop the hints here and there, like if I tell my friend we should "do this again soon" after meeting him for dinner or something, if he comes up with some lame excuse like "yeah I dunno I don't know what days I have off coming up" she's quick to interject "well you can always call me, I have a car"

...

...

o.O

O.O

*gulp*

He's a good dude but we've never ever been more than party acquaintances, I certainly don't feel any hesitation in sniping his girl out from under him if she's more in to me than she is in to him, and he seems to have no problem grabbing phone numbers "just in case" so it's almost like he's expecting it.

The whole thing is just a drama bomb though haha, i'm fully aware that most people would just be like "run away" but goddamnit, the hormones won't listen.

Anyone else run in to this problem? the forbidden fruit... so sweet and tempting, but definitely morally ambiguous.

The other girl that seems to be giving me this vibe is married though, that one I definitely have far far far back on the backburner, I need to hear divorce from that one before I even let that one through the cracks of my armor.

Manic_Skafe

You're right that most would say it's not worth the effort and that there are too many tangle-free women out there to involve yourself with a potential "drama bomb" but since it seems you know what you're getting yourself in to, I say you go for it. I've been there before - I've been that guy and I don't regret it in the least.

Breaking up a marriage would be going too far and would be more drama than it's worth but since the other relationship sounds pretty loveless, feel free to eat from that tree. Good luck and don't fall in love too soon.

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LoganSnake

Go for it. In the end, if she really wants to be with the other guy, she won't respond. I don't have any qualms about breaking up relationships unless it's marriage. Take a chance.

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Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques

little_tippler

In your entire post, I fail to see any mention of why this girl is worth going for, while doing something nasty to your supposed friend. Do you like her or do you just want to fuck her? Sounds like the latter to me.

I look at it like this: this girl, who may be way hot, I don't know, is with this lame-ass (according to your description or view of him) friend of yours. So she's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed right? And if she is really giving you the 'fuck me' eyes, then she's also willing to cheat on the guy she's with. Why do you want to get with someone who has such poor judgement and lack of character? Ok ok, hormones.

Well, if you think fucking her is worth falling out with your friend and the ensuing drama, or even just taking the chance and being rejected by her causing drama also, then go for it. Worst that can happen is one of the following, in order of likeliness IMO:

your friend tells you to fuck off and never speaks to you again, and you get to fuck her;

your friend tells you to fuck off and you fuck her, and later on when she's done with you, you and your friend are pals again;

the girl tells you to fuck off and tells your friend and he also tells you to fuck off, later when she's gone you might be pals again;

I don't know, with the billions of people in the world, you have to go for the easy lay and fuck your friend's girl? I would pass.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918

LoganSnake

Aw, why'd you have to go into detail and bullet point the consequences for him?

Isn't it more fun to just let them act on their hormonal emotions and then deal with what ever happens? No? Hm.

In any case. The moral of any advice that will be given in this thread is to weigh the pros and cons.

__________________
Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques

girldetective

lil tip is so correct.

i love her, and her super powers.

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As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons...be cheerful; strive for happiness - Desiderata

hunnychile

Go for it....but be prepared to lose a guy pal most likely, (who sounds like you'd be ok with-out anyhow - or am I wrong?).

She might be playing you just to get stoner dude jealous.
That's even more likely.

But, If they aren't married and you are ready to "man up"...then go for it. Is she worth all this?

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"I need compassion, understanding and chocolate." - NJB

dippin

Or maybe she is a naturally flirty girl and has no intentions of actually having anything with you...

Daniel_

Do you want someone to cheat on you?

If you do, then fuck the girl, because sure as eggs is eggs, a relationship born of infidelity will end in infidelity. If you have a partner who is prepared to cheat on her man with you, and does it well enough to stop her man from knowing, then she will do it to you at some point.

And you know what? Even if she doesn't you'll never be sure she isn't planning on it. The fear will eat you up.

My advice?

Go for it.

OK, OK, you know I mean "don't do it".

__________________

╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

Willravel

Daniel's right, cheating begets cheating. Don't go there, go find a single woman.

Xerxys

Most likely.

Crack

Never ever.. ever... ever go after a person while they are in a relationship. It's lower than scum imo.

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Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex.

~Halx

Shaindra

My question is, why is a woman who is essentially unavailable more compelling than ones that are probably into you and single?

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"Never regret something that once made you smile."

Anonymous Member

SOOOO, I talked to her a bit and the more she talked the more I realized I was losing interest fast

scratch the topic I guess

not sure what I saw aside from the looks I guess that only gets you so far w/me now.

It wasnt the fact that she was taken that made her more appealing. its just that it seems girls who are in relationships already are there for a reason being that they have desired traits that make them quick to get snatchedup before I even have a chance to talk to them.

crisis averted

Radio Monk33

Hah..I was gonna chip in that it might be worth some bad karma on your scoresheet..

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-Kurt Cobain

Manic_Skafe

Seriously.

Most of you post as if you've never lived.

__________________
"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian

thespian86

That last line really gets under my skin. Where is the crisis here?

There are very few things in life you have control over. Your happiness isn't one of those things.

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EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.

Anonymous Member

You don't know me then.

LordEden

HAHAHAHAHA, that statement is fucking hilarious.

Anonymous Member, I know you really well. We hang out all the time Anonymous Member, like that time we went to the club and you were all like, "Yo, Bitches! I'm Anonymous Member and I'm in the HOUSE!". Ahhhh, Anonymous Member those were great times.

I crack myself up.

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thespian86

It sounds more like you don't know you.

__________________
EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.

Toaster126

I'm not the OP, and I actually find his viewpoint somewhat debasing in general, but happiness is definitely something one can control and modify.

So you don't know me either. Haha.

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"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand)
"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)

Plan9

Is this that six-dicked frog thread that RogueGypsy was talking about?

Classic TFP.

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Whatever you can carry.

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