Depression and sex; not so fun - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

thespian86 · 05-15-2006, 03:07 PM

So here is the situation. I am currently taking paxill (sp?) for depression and severe anxiety. now my anxiety is all but gone but I feel as if my depression shifts in and out. And my sex life is the same. Sometimes I can't cum at all, or it is really hard to. Other times it's normal. Anybody have any solutions or atleast ideas as to why this is happening? I kind of can't see my doctor because he is best friends with my Gram

I can imagine the conversation taking place at church. The worst part is that my gf really wants me to cum, and feels responsible... like I'm not interested in her anymore. i need to find a solution.

Dilbert1234567 · 05-15-2006, 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by punkmusicfan21

I kind of can't see my doctor because he is best friends with my Gram

Not true, your doctor should be professional and not talk about you to anyone, patient doctor confidentiality is extremely important; they won’t go and talk about it. Some anti depressants do have sexual side effects, tell your doctor and see about some other medications instead.

snowy · 05-15-2006, 04:05 PM

I don't know about Canada, but in the United States discussion of confidential information with outside persons is a federal crime, and in most states, a state crime as well.

Do go talk to your doctor, or if you feel you cannot talk to that doctor, get a new one. Talk to your doctor about other medication options. There are SSRIs with fewer sexual side effects. It might take you a while to find one that does not have those side effects.

Good luck.

Mantus · 05-15-2006, 04:23 PM

Whoa man, that's really rough. Sounds like you have a great girl though. How sweet of her to care for her man so much. Switch doctors if you have too, get this dealth with. It's your sex life man! That's like a top priority, up there with world peace and figuring out if Jannet and Michel Jackson are the same person.

Dilbert1234567 · 05-15-2006, 04:24 PM

just to mention something else, as onesnowyowl said, you should feel very comfortable with your doctor, i just had to talk with mine about my prostate (it's infected), and its not fun to talk about, epscialy for only being 21.

Carno · 05-15-2006, 04:32 PM

Fuck that shit dude. You can't trust old people. I'd find a new doc and tell him.

thespian86 · 05-15-2006, 05:40 PM

I just had a talk with my girlfriend about our current perdicament and we discussed our relationship too. She says that she knows i love her very much (which I do) but it seems like I'm not intrested in holding her or kissig her anymore. I can see that this is really starting to hurt my relationship. It's not just sex but it seems like physical intimacy has died all together... and of course I feel horrible because I love her and want her to be happy. This is bigger then sex now and I don't want to lose her because of some fucking chemical imbalance. i'm starting to get scared that this will result in us breaking up and I really don't want to lose her. I know that she wouldn't end it with me but I don't want her to be constantly unhappy either.

hagatha · 05-15-2006, 05:50 PM

Maybe you just need different meds. Paxill has a lot of adverse side-effects and is really difficult quit. And depression is a common side-effect. If you're doctor is a GP maybe its time to send you to a specialist who knows more about this and is able to see that the depression you're suffering could lead to more serious problems.

Dilbert1234567 · 05-15-2006, 06:01 PM

Make sure you keep a good line of communication about this with your GF, let her know you are going to get help and get this fixed, hopefully she will be cool with it for a while until you get this all sorted out, I hope you feel comfortable with your doctor, if you don’t, you need to get someone you are comfortable with. I used to be very uncomfortable with doctors, until I finally realized that the only way I could get my problems fixed was to talk about them.

iamnormal · 05-15-2006, 07:39 PM

Other anti depressants may work better for you. Some of the newer anti depressants have less side effects.
You should get a doctor thats specialized it this field.

OzOz · 05-18-2006, 03:06 PM

As others have already said: your doctor should NEVER talk about your details with another person without your permission.

Also, I'd agree with the comments that you should find a specialist who deals with psychological problems. Sometimes the medications can just be used to help get you back on an even keel while any underlying harmful thought processes are dealt with, and then if things seem to be going OK, you might be able to leave the medication. That's what has happened in my case. I had the sexual side effects from medication and hated them for that reason. If anything, it was an added incentive to get the thoughts dealt with.

Also, if you do see a specialist about this, it might be a good idea to take your girlfriend along for one of your consultations as well, to help her to understand what is happening and why. On top of that, would relationship counselling be of any help? Maybe to give you both more ideas of how to keep each other happy while you're on the medication.

Anyway, good luck and I hope you'll have a happy ending. Sounds like you've got a keeper there.

Toaster126 · 05-18-2006, 10:12 PM

See a doctor, a different one if you feel like they would commit a federal and state crime to tell your grandmother about your sex life, and tell your girlfriend what's going on. She shouldn't feel like she is doing something wrong (nor should you).

thespian86 · 05-19-2006, 06:39 PM

I talked to a doctor about it and told him my situation. I told him that I wanted to slowly reduce and he agreed. I have over the past while and the past eight days I have been paxil free. i had sex three times in the course of this evening... and came everytime. Sweet, sweet release (pun intended).

Aurakles · 05-19-2006, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by punkmusicfan21

i had sex three times in the course of this evening... and came everytime. Sweet, sweet release (pun intended).

I'm sure it was, it's been a long time and coming...

analog · 05-21-2006, 12:52 AM

If you think your doctor would tell someone else something you tell in confidence, you need to seek a new doctor immediately. That is a terrible breech of both confidentiality ethics for doctors, and a violation of patient privacy laws (HIPAA).

That's intolerable.

And as a side note... in my experience of people talking about it, Paxil is not all that good at treating depression. Sometimes if the anxiety is what causes your depression, then it might help by extension... but i've not heard of someone having relief from depression from Paxil. It's mostly good at being an anti-anxiety medication.

05-15-2006, 03:07 PM	#1 (permalink)
thespian86 change is hard. Location: the green room.	Depression and sex; not so fun So here is the situation. I am currently taking paxill (sp?) for depression and severe anxiety. now my anxiety is all but gone but I feel as if my depression shifts in and out. And my sex life is the same. Sometimes I can't cum at all, or it is really hard to. Other times it's normal. Anybody have any solutions or atleast ideas as to why this is happening? I kind of can't see my doctor because he is best friends with my Gram I can imagine the conversation taking place at church. The worst part is that my gf really wants me to cum, and feels responsible... like I'm not interested in her anymore. i need to find a solution. __________________ EX: Whats new? ME: I officially love coffee more then you now. EX: uh... ME: So, not much.

05-15-2006, 04:05 PM	#3 (permalink)
snowy Kick Ass Kunoichi Location: Oregon	I don't know about Canada, but in the United States discussion of confidential information with outside persons is a federal crime, and in most states, a state crime as well. Do go talk to your doctor, or if you feel you cannot talk to that doctor, get a new one. Talk to your doctor about other medication options. There are SSRIs with fewer sexual side effects. It might take you a while to find one that does not have those side effects. Good luck. __________________ If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

05-15-2006, 04:24 PM	#5 (permalink)
Dilbert1234567 Devils Cabana Boy Location: Central Coast CA	just to mention something else, as onesnowyowl said, you should feel very comfortable with your doctor, i just had to talk with mine about my prostate (it's infected), and its not fun to talk about, epscialy for only being 21. __________________ Donate Blood! "Love is not finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." -Sam Keen

05-15-2006, 04:32 PM	#6 (permalink)
Carno Junkie	Fuck that shit dude. You can't trust old people. I'd find a new doc and tell him. __________________ http://how-to-spell-ridiculous.com/

05-15-2006, 05:40 PM	#7 (permalink)
thespian86 change is hard. Location: the green room.	I just had a talk with my girlfriend about our current perdicament and we discussed our relationship too. She says that she knows i love her very much (which I do) but it seems like I'm not intrested in holding her or kissig her anymore. I can see that this is really starting to hurt my relationship. It's not just sex but it seems like physical intimacy has died all together... and of course I feel horrible because I love her and want her to be happy. This is bigger then sex now and I don't want to lose her because of some fucking chemical imbalance. i'm starting to get scared that this will result in us breaking up and I really don't want to lose her. I know that she wouldn't end it with me but I don't want her to be constantly unhappy either. __________________ EX: Whats new? ME: I officially love coffee more then you now. EX: uh... ME: So, not much. Last edited by thespian86; 05-15-2006 at 05:49 PM..

05-15-2006, 04:23 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mantus lascivious	Whoa man, that's really rough. Sounds like you have a great girl though. How sweet of her to care for her man so much. Switch doctors if you have too, get this dealth with. It's your sex life man! That's like a top priority, up there with world peace and figuring out if Jannet and Michel Jackson are the same person.

05-15-2006, 05:50 PM	#8 (permalink)
hagatha Addict	Maybe you just need different meds. Paxill has a lot of adverse side-effects and is really difficult quit. And depression is a common side-effect. If you're doctor is a GP maybe its time to send you to a specialist who knows more about this and is able to see that the depression you're suffering could lead to more serious problems. __________________ Thats the last time I trust the strangest people I ever met....H. Simpson

05-15-2006, 06:01 PM	#9 (permalink)
Dilbert1234567 Devils Cabana Boy Location: Central Coast CA	Make sure you keep a good line of communication about this with your GF, let her know you are going to get help and get this fixed, hopefully she will be cool with it for a while until you get this all sorted out, I hope you feel comfortable with your doctor, if you don’t, you need to get someone you are comfortable with. I used to be very uncomfortable with doctors, until I finally realized that the only way I could get my problems fixed was to talk about them. __________________ Donate Blood! "Love is not finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." -Sam Keen

05-15-2006, 07:39 PM	#10 (permalink)
iamnormal Addict Location: In the id	Other anti depressants may work better for you. Some of the newer anti depressants have less side effects. You should get a doctor thats specialized it this field.

05-18-2006, 03:06 PM	#11 (permalink)
OzOz Psycho Location: Right here, right now.	As others have already said: your doctor should NEVER talk about your details with another person without your permission. Also, I'd agree with the comments that you should find a specialist who deals with psychological problems. Sometimes the medications can just be used to help get you back on an even keel while any underlying harmful thought processes are dealt with, and then if things seem to be going OK, you might be able to leave the medication. That's what has happened in my case. I had the sexual side effects from medication and hated them for that reason. If anything, it was an added incentive to get the thoughts dealt with. Also, if you do see a specialist about this, it might be a good idea to take your girlfriend along for one of your consultations as well, to help her to understand what is happening and why. On top of that, would relationship counselling be of any help? Maybe to give you both more ideas of how to keep each other happy while you're on the medication. Anyway, good luck and I hope you'll have a happy ending. Sounds like you've got a keeper there. __________________ Maybe you should put some shorts on or something, if you wanna keep fighting evil today.

05-18-2006, 10:12 PM	#12 (permalink)
Toaster126 Extreme moderation Location: Kansas City, yo.	See a doctor, a different one if you feel like they would commit a federal and state crime to tell your grandmother about your sex life, and tell your girlfriend what's going on. She shouldn't feel like she is doing something wrong (nor should you). __________________ "The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand) "The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)

05-19-2006, 06:39 PM	#13 (permalink)
thespian86 change is hard. Location: the green room.	I talked to a doctor about it and told him my situation. I told him that I wanted to slowly reduce and he agreed. I have over the past while and the past eight days I have been paxil free. i had sex three times in the course of this evening... and came everytime. Sweet, sweet release (pun intended). __________________ EX: Whats new? ME: I officially love coffee more then you now. EX: uh... ME: So, not much.

05-21-2006, 12:52 AM	#15 (permalink)
analog Banned	If you think your doctor would tell someone else something you tell in confidence, you need to seek a new doctor immediately. That is a terrible breech of both confidentiality ethics for doctors, and a violation of patient privacy laws (HIPAA). That's intolerable. And as a side note... in my experience of people talking about it, Paxil is not all that good at treating depression. Sometimes if the anxiety is what causes your depression, then it might help by extension... but i've not heard of someone having relief from depression from Paxil. It's mostly good at being an anti-anxiety medication.