12 year olds and thongs
 

My 12 year old daughter want some thong underwear, my wife thinks it is ok but I dont like the idea. How old is old enough to wear underwwear like that. Please help I dont want to fell like the the only one out here that feels this way. Thanks

I've got a daughter about that age and the thought of a thong for preteens is repulsive.

Too young in my eyes. To me, it's sexing up the younger girls too much, too fast. If parents let them, it's their choice, but my daughter would not be allowed.

The problem with kids today is not the kids, its the parents. That you even have to ask this question is rediculous.

Re: 12 year olds and thongs
 

As for my daughter, when she's old enough to move out of the house, and start buying her own. 'Till then, it's white cotton "granny panties", with cartoon characters on 'em. I'm hopin' it'll encourage her to keep her pants on over 'em. ;)

12? Wearing a thong? Why? That's just crazy.

Chances are she doesn't have a job. Maybe she earns allowance or babysits. So how will she buy them? Right, she can't. So refuse to buy them. There are plenty of pretty underwear for kids her age to wear. She doesn't need a thong.

Kids these days :rolleyes: When did they decide to grow up so fast?

Stings a bit, but I feel the same way.

Amen. I just didn't say this, because I'm too PC in today's world.

Maxhooters- I'm gonna echo what everyone else here is saying. My children live in a world that the thought of me even considering such a thing is preposterous, and they know it. It's one thing to keep communication with your children, but another thing to consider the asinine. If my daughter wanted to do crack, and she asked me if it was okay, you think I'd consider it? Some things parents need to go "Archie Bunker" about. ;)

I'm concerned that your wife thinks it's OK for young girls to oversexualize themselves. You should have a serious discussion with her.

Im guessing that by the time I have children and God forbide, the trend is going to be no underwear at all... But if you are the one suppling the cash to buy her wardrobe, you have all the power in the world. And if that doesn't work, you could just chain her up in the basement.

Even not counting the "sexualizing" aspect of wearing thongs my Doc says they aren't as good for genital health. Cotten panties in any other cut are better. The thong part being smack against your anus will kindof rub bacteria in other directions and make it more possible for her to get other infections. Get her bikini, low cut or high cut, go ahead and let her choose something nice but I wouldn't let her get thongs. Also why should it matter what kind of panty she's wearing - she shouldn't be exposing them to anyone YET I should hope. Stay away from the thongs as long as possible.

You would think, but theres got to be something thats making her want the thongs though, and with the rate at which kids are learning/exploring sex at an early age, I wouldn't be surprised if she has in fact gotten the notion that its "sexy." I too agree that kids are growing up WAY too fast, and the only way that we can try and reverse this process is to start laying down the law. I'm disgusted when I go out somewhere and see 14 and 15 year olds wearing clothes so short even a prostitute would be embarrassed, and they had to start somewhere.

Tell her she can get a thong, but she can only wear them on her head.

God, that's funny.

I hope I can remember that line if my daughter starts asking.

I echo earlier sentiments, but the real question is why she wants to wear them. Since the purpose of thong underwear is to delete panty lines, or to accentuate one's ASSests...you need to clarify the intentions, not just the product.

I feel for you...lots.

*edited because I don't understand the question, and answered in a way that seemed to endorse sex with minors.*

maxhooters just curious...
what is your daughters attitude towards the opposite sex? is she boy crazy? or not interested in that yet?
these sound like ridiculous questions but i am just wondering about her motivation... is she doing it to show "things" off? or is she doing it bc she sees her favorite pop stars wearing clothes like that? either way she shouldnt wear them and maybe you should consider deflecting her attention elsewhere... maybe enroll her in gymnastics or softball...

When I was twelve the last thing on my mind was what type of panties I should be wearing. Seriously! I'm 19. It wasn't THAT long ago, was it? :confused: The ONLY reason that I could see such a young girl wanting/needing (it's even pushing the limit to call it 'needing' for this reason) is if she's in dance or something where a pantyline would draw attention. But even then, if she's onstage, not too many people will notice.

I agree with raeanna. Bikini, high cut, low cut, no thongs. She doesn't need the infections, she doesn't need to sexualize herself.



Send the girl my way, we'll have a chat. ;)

thanks I was looking for an explanation to the rash between my anus and my balls.

as for a twelve yr old? i don't think it's appropriate, i think it might be time for a serious talk between the parent(s) and the child. a 12 yr old shouldn't be wanting underwear like that. who are they gonna show them to?

any parent that would let a preteen wear a thong needs to get a second opinion, maybe from a psychiatrist.

if you say yes to thongs, it'll be g-strings before you know it.

buy her some thong flip flops and tell her thats as close as shes gonna get while she lives under your roof...

when i was 12 i still thought girls had cooties...

My 6 year old was talking about her "soul-mate" the other day and will soon be asking for sexy cloths. Thongs have a place and time and I cannot imagine either for a 12 year old. Only we can save our children from themselves and the media.

I agree that a twelve year old shouldn't be wearing clothing like that, but I have to admit I did.
My mom just figured out really quickly that I would wear them whether she liked it or not, so she just sat me down and explained that just because I have cool undies now doesn't make me an adult and I shouldn't be afraid to keep acting like a kid.
It worked. I wore the undies (although I got some shit from other females during PE), but I also understood what that meant. I think being open and honest with your kids is the best way to go.

Does something trivial like what kind of undies she's wearing really matter when she know's the difference between right and wrong?

12 is too young. 13 is too young. 14 is too young...etc.

Dont let anyone else tell you how to raise your kid and do what you feel is right. If it was mine then yes i'd sit her down explain some things and tell her not to wear it and if she does it behind my back then shes only devalueing herself. It kind of makes me sick to even have to discuss this about a 12 yr old. But im not a parent yet so what do i know.

Let your kid live and learn. Seriously though, what is WRONG with thong underwear?

It's not that thong underwear is wrong. It's the statement that it makes. I think the biggest question is WHY does she want to wear it?

Because she wants to fit in, and be cool.

It's people in society who construct what it means. It's just underwear, forget about it. Maybe she has a higher confidence about herself wearing it, or maybe it's more comfortable.

Leave people alone

she's 12. She doesn't NEED to be left alone.

I agree. My 6-year old has had too much discussion for too long, and now it's hell to get him to understand he is not an adult.
I've come full circle from a "anything is OK if they understand what's going on" to "no way, and you may not use that tone of voice in this hoouse!" I've don't want to be my dad, but here I am anyway....(Although I don't understand 12-year old girls, I see them milling about, and often I see them wearing clothes that make me (a complete stranger) want to ask these girls if they know what they are doing. I never would, but how would they react to "Are you trying to capture a man who only wants to screw you? That's what you get with an invitation like that!"
I don't care how old a person is, sexy undies feel sexy. I got silk boxers when I was about that age, and lemme tell ya, it changed my life! It was the innocent beginning of my sex life. If she's ready for a sex life, by all means, get her a thong.<- That was supposed to be an obvious joke..(sarcasm)
--And I also can't tell what is right anymore as far as parenting goes. I feel that we parents get a lot of mixed messages today, and there is no "right thing" to do. My son needs a "good whuppin" like nobody's business, but in this society I'm honestly afraid to, for my own protection and because a family therapist could get the idea that "abuse" or "violence" was the beginning of the problem rather than the last resort. Do what you think is right, and don't beat yourself up if she hates you for it. She needs a parent right now, not a freind.

I agree with skinbag, she needs some direction right now from a parent, I'm sure this discussion came about from friends or peer pressure so she's probably had all the advice she needs from friends on this matter.

This had to be a post just to get a rise out of everyone. Otherwise I think we would've heard some kind of reaction from the poster by now... He/she is just sitting back laughing.

I sure as hell am laughing. Oh wait, not really.

I know alot of parents that would let their kids wear thongs. Frankly, I find it rediculous. What would be the point of a 12 year old wearing a thong? Social acceptance? Personal maturity and gain? I mean seriously. If your daughter thinks that she will be a cooler person by having a thong, maybe you need to teach her how to bake cookies or make kool-aid.

Ok. Them's fightin' words. Although I see your point (hopefully) that there are better things for a girl her age to be doing than running around in thongs, I highly doubt that all a twelve year old could do would be bake cookies or make kool aid. I'm sorry, that just kinda got me goin'.. blame it on the PMS that I never get but decided to creep up on me. But she could also be playing sports, babysitting, hell, she could be workin' on cars with dad for all I care!!! A) Girls can do more than be barefoot in the kitchen B) GIRLS CAN DO ANYTHING BOYS CAN!!! (except write their name in the snow while they pee )


/rant


PS Sorry bout that.. I'm gonna go take a Midol now.

No way, no blaming it on the PMS! That is a cop-out... What I was saying was, teach them something! I spend alot of my time in the kitchen.. barefoot.. but that does not mean .. I totally lost my train of thought... .. shit.

Anyways, I don't doubt that 12 year old girls are unable to do anything but cook, infact I'd rather have a macaroni necklace then a t-bone from a 12 year old any day. Teach her how to change my oil, teach her how to babysit my kids, teach.. don't let them parade around in thongs, as if a 12 year old has a whole lot to flaunt. And if you really don't care, think about who a 12 year old with a thong is going to attract. I sure as hell know that I won't be checking out a girl that looks 12, even if she has a thong. Maybe not me, maybe another demographic might be interested in your 12 year old's thong. Remember that flyer about the convicted child molester? Yea.

I'd be surprised if 12 year olds could even cook.

If your kid is the standard 12 year old, no, just no.

Damn you, stole my idea!

And, as much as this is a little off topic, the reasons for wearing a thong often kind of make me chuckle. Speaking from a guy's perspective, often times, we can see a thong line just as easily as a panty line, because we DO look.

um, how the hell does a 12 year old "fit in" wearing a thong??? what group is she trying to fit in? why would other people know what underwear she has on? I suppose Gym class showers, but I'm not buying any of that crap. My daughter is 9, and I cannot imagine that in 3 years I'll be supporting any kind of underwear worn for other people's benefit.. Mommy wears thongs... but the kids, by damned, don't know about it....

I am sure she just wants some because her friends have them and she sees them as "cool".

I doubt a 12 year old has a hidden agenda when it comes to underwear.

No no and no.

A parent's job isn't to be popular nor to be her friend; it is to make decisions for your child and to intruct him/her until such time they can make decisions for themselves.

No more than I would let my 12 yo put on make-up, fishnets and highheels and hang out at the mall would I let her wear thongs.

Thongs are an adult decision and she is not an adult.

For God's sake, there will be plenty of time for her to be an adult later!