silvertiger

Greetings all,

I have spens a healthy clip of my free time reading books and thought to myself "why not.. i can do that".

I like the way i write.. and want to see if others do too. Input would be awesome.. Feedback would be better.

this is a 1st draft of my Prologue .. lemme know what you think.

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Prologue

A heavy mist formed as he exhaled into the cold night air. His lungs were burning from the sheer effort of keeping the steady pace that had driven through the eastern half of the <name> forest. Steadfastly aware that his heavy breathing could very well bring attention to him he began to recite an old meditation he had learned in his youth that best ease him at times like this.

“I shall still my inner being, so that I may calm the storms within me. I shall quiet my furrowed mind that I may listen to all that may guide me. I shall quell all fear that I may gain courage. From all these things shall I gain solace and overcome any challenge”

It had been a while since his last mental recital, yet it had the expected calming effect, as his breath was now slow and controlled. He could still feel his heart beating in his chest which was a faint reminder of his current situation that brought him back to the present.
He could smell the growing moss that covered the ancient trees around him. As he heard the snap of a branch in the distance he whirled into action his body twisting like a reed in the wind as he skirted to the left just in time for a steel tipped arrow to imbed itself into the base of the tree exactly where his head had been.
It had come just as he had anticipated it. One <fellow trainee name> was upon him immediately and he could hear the movements of two more following while the fourth whisked in from the forest canopy where the arrow had been loosed. With his mental acuity he was able to see the entire scene play out as if it had been rehearsed. The first attacker came in with a quick swing from his dagger that <hero> easily sidestepped. As he glided to the left he positioned himself to parry the oncoming sword that the second was bringing to bear on him. He quickly brushed aside the sword with ample time to arc a counter thrust with his staff that connected just above the shoulder causing the sword to drop softly to the ground. With a small movement he used the butt of the staff to render the sword bearer unconscious with a blow to the temple.
Having only a split second to read and anticipate the third attacker’s intentions he rolled over the falling unconscious attacker and swung with all his might to bear directly on the man behind. Not having been prepared for the speed and agility of <hero> the attacker only had time to wince before falling to the ground in a crumpled heap.
Now there was the challenge of facing two foes that had seen him dispatch their counterparts with impunity. The first attacker lunged over his fallen comrades to attempt to draw <hero> into an off balance defensive stance. This seemed to work until <hero> caught the attackers leading sword edge with a tassle from his staff and drew the attacker forward into his approaching knee, rendering his third victim into silent sleep.
The fourth assailant, knowing very well that he would be no match at melee altered his course to veer away from the battle. The staff in <hero>’s hands lifted slowly as he concentrated on the spell that would end this conflict. A brilliant blue glow grew around the head of the staff as small glimmers of light shone from the <fancy name> crystal that had been mounted there. <hero> need not open his eyes to locate his prey, as this would be assassin made no secret of his plight and as such created an easily trail of sounds that could be used to isolate him. <hero> let loose the magical burst, and in an instant heard the echoed screams of his quarry as the man fell silent to the forest floor.
With the speed of nothing he had ever seen <hero> saw a flash of what he knew must be an immensely powerful spell and in an instant he was encased in a sphere of solid air and then the world faded from his vision as he lost consciousness.

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I've also begun chapter one.. and hope to continue.. but time isn't always kind to a full time worker and father of 4...

either way.. love to hear from ya.

emmdubbs

simply amazing...very visuall...can't wait to continue to read...it reminds me of an old Magic The Gathering novel i read as a young'un.

very captivating so far...

*bravo...*

__________________
"You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world." - Tyler Durden

silvertiger

Well.. you tortured me .. i guess ill have to post the rest of what i have .. and maybe it will prod me to keep going... (not much yet)
Chapter 1

(hero) woke from his troubled sleep to find that he was lying in an ill favored cot that barely supported his feeble frame. The smell of some creature roasting with strong spices wafted in from behind him and reinforced the pang that was in his stomach already from hunger that had developed from his exertions and worsened by the length of time that he was unconscious.
Slowly he placed his thoughts in order before speaking. “The men, in the forest... are they …” but he was abruptly halted by a gruff voice behind him. “They’re fine, and will be back to their normal rotten selves when they awake, which I assure will be a bit longer than you took to recover. They may seek revenge for your actions, but the (governing party) will not allow it”
(hero) slowly sat up, his head spinning, and began to examine his surroundings. He had never been in (mentor)’s (residence) before and found it quite intriguing. Small trinkets covered every part of visible wall ranging from simple marble amulets to the finest of articulate devices with placed gems and embedded with runes that shone of the finest metals. What they were for (hero) had no idea, but he looked upon them with the awe of a fledgling (magic) wielder and understood that many of these so called trinkets held great power and unknown histories. (hero)’s attention was broken by the slight pressure on his head as (mentor) placed a strong hand there. “You may feel a bit strange as this is your first magical healing, but I feel it necessary.” As (mentor) began to focus (hero) began to feel a faint warmth expand from his chest outwards. As the heat increased his began to loose clarity of mind and he found himself drifting as if in a day dream.
As (hero)’s his head began to clear he realized that he was again lying on the cot, but this time his mind and body felt as though he had just awaken from a long night’s sleep. He arose with a look of awe on his face as he gazed upon (mentor) with a new found respect. “That should help you feel better, and the more you get healed the more your cease to resist the magic flowing into you. Next time it will not be so intrusive and it will allow more lucid healings.” (hero) inquired “How long was i lying down?” “Not long.” (mentor) replied. “It was only about 2 minutes.” (hero) was amazed as his sense of time had been so wrong. He was sure that he must have been healing for much longer than that to be feeling as well as he did now.
(mentor) spent the next few minutes preparing the food that had been cooking. (hero) could smell the vegetables that accompanied the main course and was very interested in the first taste as he had not smelt this combination of herbs before. He could smell the telltale hints of brimweed, known to produce a numbing effect when used in sufficient quantities, spar root , often used as a slight tenderizer and as part of a few healing tinctures, and a pinch of velespier leaf that was quite unique as under certain circumstances can induces a type of lulling calm with no negative side effects. While he was aware of these herbs and many others he could tell the strength of each odor and the combined aroma of the entire meal that none were used out of proportion and the end result would be quite delicious and refreshing.
(mentor) served them both in small trenchers that held generous portions and accompanied it with a thin tall carafe of a custom brewed tea made from a mixture of dark leaves, dried root and flower petals sweetened with fresh harvested honey. They ate in silence and (mentor) did not speak of the test, but instead directed conversation into the more important topics of further study, continued meditation and weapons training that would likely be placed on (hero) soon. (mentor) wished to express his pride for the unprecedented performance that (hero) had given but felt it necessary to curb such accolades until another time so he might turn the mind of (hero) away from the events that happened the night before and focus on what was ahead.


(hero) woke with a sense of dread for today he would be taken before the (governing council) where they would provide a quick assessment of his performance the day before but more importantly they would be determining his position in the ladder of potential (higher training inductees) and into which caste of further training he would progress whether it be (magic) , physical, or weapons. (hero) was passionate about each school of training and had thought for untold hours about the sacrifice to be made to focus on any given school and the loss suffered in the other areas.

SugahBritches

This is really good Silver! Do you have more of this?

And do you have other topics/subjects/themes in which you write about?

(I told you I would snoop. Heh.)

silvertiger

Well. i havent written much more on the novel ... but i do some small tidbits .. if you search the forums for posts by me you'll find my other literature snippets .. many in response to the writing challenges.. and a few others.

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