Scared of death or rather nonexistence?

[waltzforvenus]

My uncle was just recently diagnosed with stage 3 cancer. It spread from his throat, to his jaw, and down to his lungs and he doesn't have very long to live. It was in one of my daily spaceouts where I actually had a real grasp of my mortality, for the first time the idea of death hit me like a moving freighter.

Death isn't just sleep, it's the absence of thoughts. I don't believe in an afterlife, and the thought of just ending, the loss of my ability to think and comprehend and feel is a downright scary thought. Think about it: everything you are presently, were, achieved, will become, have felt - it's all feels so insignificant.

I just dunno what to do.

[ratbastid]

Like billions of human beings before you, you could devise some system of post-mortem existence to put your faith in. It's a very comforting thought, however irrational.

Me, I say: Who knows what if anything happens after. All I know is, I am going to die. That's not in question. The only question is: what's it going to be like for me and for those around me between now and then.

[spectre]

I've almost died more times than I care to remember. After a while, it tends to lose it's scare factor. I don't believe in an afterlife either, and I've always thought of it as a dreamless sleep. If I'm dead, I'm not going to know it, and because I don't know it, I'm not going to care. You just need to hope that you made some sort of impression in someone's life so that someone will remember you. That's the best you can hope for no matter who you are. But really, it's not something you should dwell on because it's something that's totally out of your control, and since it's out of your control, worrying about it doesn't do anything to help you.

All I can suggest is that you do something that makes you feel like you've made a difference. Help out a friend, volunteer, do whatever so that you feel that what you've done has helped someone or made a difference in their life. We all can't be famous for something major, so that's the best any of us can do.

[noodlebee]

I think scared of death or non-existence is just part of our biology. We are animals who struggle for survival.

Personally, I don't mind non-existence or having no memory with other people. The most important is just make a slight improvment on the world even if they don't remember my name.

[shesus]

You live while you're alive. Sometimes people lose that feeling of living. Life is short and death is inevitable. I guess happiness while you're alive is a goal...at least it's mine.

I've never been scared of death, for me anyway. I don't know what will happen after I die, but I'm not too concerned about it either. If you dwell on your death, you won't enjoy life.

What scares me are people around me dying. I haven't had to deal with many deaths and it frightens me to think of people I care about dying.

[Sion]

It's not the death, or the non-existance that scares me. It's the uncertainty factor. I HATE not knowing what comes next.

[Invalid Comfort]

When my grandmother died this past winter it was the first death I had to deal with. It was difficult, but I wrote her a poem. Poetry and the RIP factor allowed me to get over it. My morality is insubstantial, so I hope to leave a positive remnants.

I think that the "afterlife" consists of what-ever an individual believes in. I emulate slightly with the buhdist(sp?) perspective, with my own personal twist.

I've realized that the oceanic field that we call life, I'm nothing more than a blade of grass. I hope to return to the shade underneath the tree of life.

Might I be able to enjoy the shade now, by-chance? If death is another life, then I'll live it when it comes, until then; this is all I have.

[QuasiMondo]

I'm more worried about the dying thing than death itself. Rarely is a person's death not without pain and trauma.

[bluestars87]

I'm scared of dying. I hope there is an afterlife.

[little_tippler]

I'm scared of dying only because I don't want to not exist. It just seems so weird. Why am I here in the first place if after there is nothing? And I think there is nothing. It just seems like a waste. Where was I before? I wasn't even an entity, in my view. But I can't remember not existing. It's just scary to not be able to conclude this type of thought about death. And I still feel like I'm never going to die...because nothing makes sense. So why would anything around me even be real? Sometimes life is like being in a dream. Sorry for the rant.

[rockzilla]

As long as someone rememebers me after I'm gone, then I'm still alive.

[Invalid Comfort]

Originally Posted by little_tippler

I'm scared of dying only because I don't want to not exist. It just seems so weird. Why am I here in the first place if after there is nothing? And I think there is nothing. It just seems like a waste. Where was I before? I wasn't even an entity, in my view. But I can't remember not existing. It's just scary to not be able to conclude this type of thought about death. And I still feel like I'm never going to die...because nothing makes sense. So why would anything around me even be real? Sometimes life is like being in a dream. Sorry for the rant.

Have you ever practiced meditation before?

When one questions the reality of death, everything else seems insignificant.

Even though you feel like your never going to die, the reaper says otherwise. The only thing that we are "destined to do" is to die.

Because I don't know what comes after death, I try to live my best now. If I knew what came after, I may not live as hard as I did without that knowledge. Going through life thinking that I'd never die would be the worst lie to tell myself, because it would cause fear of something I shouldn't be afraid of. Fear is a host of so many of my own problems, don't need to add another on top .

[Siege]

i'm not scared of death. i'm scared of a long, drawn out, painful death.

[Invalid Comfort]

Originally Posted by Siege

i'm not scared of death. i'm scared of a long, drawn out, painful death.

I would ask you this, are you familiar with self-fulfilling prophecies? What if those who die long, painful deaths are the ones who happen to deathly afraid of it?

I will never know, I'll put me foot in my mouth now.

*mumble mumble mumble*

[Siege]

Originally Posted by Invalid Comfort

I would ask you this, are you familiar with self-fulfilling prophecies? What if those who die long, painful deaths are the ones who happen to deathly afraid of it?

I will never know, I'll put me foot in my mouth now.

*mumble mumble mumble*

I am familiar with self fulfilling prophecies. However, i don't think it would really apply in this case. Unless I subconsciously now want to go get hurt really bad or contract some incredibley painful, incurable disease.

[abaya]

I used to believe that I would go to heaven when I died. Later I realized that this meant some people would go to heaven, and some people would go to hell... and eventually, I stopped believing in the whole thing. Didn't seem very fair.

I still don't know what will happen, and probably never will. But in order for me to make the most of my life from moment to moment, I have to believe that nothing will happen when I die. That in one instant I will be alive, the person that I have spent many years becoming, and hopefully surrounded by people whom I love, and who have loved me, in that particular body... and in the next instant, I will become a pile of decaying organic matter. I am afraid of what happens in between those two instants. Not the pain, but the letting go of life. Will I be able to do it? What if I am unconscious, knocked out by morphine or other pain medication (as is often the case with cancer)? What if I don't even realize that I am ceasing to live?

That's what happened to my grandmother. She didn't die in pain, because she was so numb from the morphine. I almost think I would prefer the former, just to be alive and conscious as long as possible. But seeing her dead body laid out in a coffin, and then watching that dead body and coffin being pushed into a warehouse-sized crematory... and come back to us in a jar... well, there is no better metaphor than "ashes to ashes, dust to dust."

[Willravel]

Death = nonexistence, and I only would regret dying unexpectedly so my family doesn't have some time to say goodbye. If I die, I die. Nothin' to fear about that.