witmol

A Highway Patrolman waited outside a popular bar, hoping for a bust. At closing time everyone come out and he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, looking for his car. After trying his keys on five other cars, he finally found his own vehicle. He sat in the car a good ten minutes, as the other patrons left. He turned his lights on, then off, wipers on, then off. He started to pull forward into the grass, then stopped. Finally, when he was the last car, he pulled out onto the road and started to drive away. The patrolman, waiting for this, turned on his lights and pulled the man over. He administered the breathalyzer test, and to his great surprise, the man blew a 0.00. The patrolman was dumbfounded. "This equipment must be broken!" he exclaimed. "I doubt it," said the man, "Tonight I am the designated decoy!"

carrot glace

nice! there should be one of those at every bar

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"blaine is a pain and that is the truth"

WarriorBuddha

Heard that one before. Like it every time.

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Thockmorton knew if he were ever to break wind in the echo chamber, he would never hear the end of it.

Dilbert1234567

thats great

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Donate Blood!

"Love is not finding the perfect person, but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." -Sam Keen

itch vaccine

Yepp, heard it before.. or perhaps read

FHM

MikeyChalupa

The punchline I heard was...

Driver: I'm the DD.
Cop: Designated Driver?
Driver: Nope... Designated Decoy.

-Mikey

feelgood

That's hilarious! We gotta get one of those

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Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war

PayUp

Thats genius. Gonna have to try it.

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Born to Lose.

loganmule

cute...I'll add it to my joke folder

Delvid

Oldie but still funny.

the_marq

I do that everytime I drive home wasted.

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The Truth:

Johnny Cash could have kicked Bruce Lee's ass if he wanted to.

#3 in a series

Mantus

Haha, thats very good

skills1

I did that once for 50 dollars a person who wanted me to decoy for them. LOL so much money made.

slimshaydee

AHAHAHAHAH! That was a great one!

Y2KDREAD

That is quite a good joke. That would just be a fun joke to pull anyways, just hope it would not end up getting you thrown in jail.

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Signatures are for chumps.

japhyryder

I also wonder if there isn't some law against that

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It's only entertainment, someone's sick idea of a joke.

irseg

I'm curious too. There's nothing technically illegal about driving oddly in a parking lot and then pulling out, but I wonder if there's some kind of law about interfering with a police officer that could apply.

warrrreagl

A drunk Cajun left the bar one night and lost control of his car on the way home. He finally came to a rest after flipping his car through seven or eight rolls, and calmly waited for the highway patrol to arrive.

When the patrolman arrived, he took one look at the accident scene, shook his head, and approached the Cajun. He asked, "Sir, are you drunk?"

The Cajun pulled himself up straight and tall and retorted, "Hell, yeah. You don't think I'm one of those damn reckless drivers, do you?"


(a classic from Justin Wilson)

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Living is easy with eyes closed.

Homey_V

Hehehe, Both Good jokes.

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You did what with a duck?

rider07

now thats actually a good idea, cuz he probably wouldnt get busted either