troit

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected:

a half-gallon of 2% milk,
a carton of eggs,
a quart of orange juice,
a head of romaine lettuce,
a 2 lb. can of coffee,
and a 1 lb. package of bacon

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

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I've yet to dephile myself...

paj

great, heard it before, different variation though, the cashier said it
got a laugh though

mystmarimatt

Hahaha...that's so sad...

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Words of Wisdom:

If you could really get to know someone and know that they weren't lying to you, then you would know the world was real. Because you could agree on things, you could compare notes. That must be why people get married or make Art. So they'll be able to really know something and not go insane.

Ilow

I heard it before with the cashier making the comment to a guy and saying "...because you're fuckin' ugly" Still funny, though

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"Religion is the one area of our discourse in which it is considered noble to pretend to be certain about things no human being could possibly be certain about"
--Sam Harris

thedrake

hehe

canucker

Good one +

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fizzledorf

harsh

Crack

I used this joke on a friend while giving him a ride to the store for groceries... Funny Stuff!

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Crack, you and I are long overdue for a vicious bout of mansex.

~Halx

wordssmith22

zing! good stuff

gilada

hehe.

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lucidity

Almost sounds like something you'd hear in the movie 'Clerks'.

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Faith is the daring of the soul to go farther than it can see. -William Newton Clark

blaze

hahaha I heard this a while ago and when I told my friends, they couldn't stop laughing.

xim

haha its funny when you make fun of ugly people

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If I could be anyone in the world I would be Britney Spears. Shes in so many commercials about pepsi... www.ximcity.com

small one

Heard before, but still funny