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Old 05-01-2003, 12:30 PM   #1 (permalink)
pinche vato
 
warrrreagl's Avatar
 
Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton
Man gets even (I dare you to try it)

A husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up as it sometimes does.

But then the wife suddenly stops and says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." "WHAT!?" says her husband. The wife explains that he must be in tune with her emotional needs as a Woman. He realizes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it.

The next day the husband takes her shopping at a big department store. He walks around and has her try on three very expensive outfits. She can't decide.He tells his wife to take all three of them. They head to the shoe department and pick up matching shoes worth $200 each.

The pair go to the jewelry department where she finds a set of diamond earrings that her husband agrees to buy for her. The wife is so excited. She thinks her husband has flipped out - but she doesn't care. She goes for the matching tennis bracelet. The husband says "You don't even play tennis, but if you like it then let's get it."

The wife is jumping up and down so excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says to her husband, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cashier."

The husband stops and says, "No, honey I don't feel like buying all this stuff now." The wife's face goes blank. "Honey - I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while."

The look on her face is indescribable and she is about to explode as her husband says, "You must be in tune with my financial needs as a Man."
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Old 05-01-2003, 12:44 PM   #2 (permalink)
Psycho
 
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*ROFL* Any man with the balls to actually try that won't have them for long....
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Old 05-01-2003, 12:55 PM   #3 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Houston, Tx
I sense....I sense...yes....it's definately a man with testicles so large that they made a very esy target for a woman with new shoes....


Aside from that, I LIKE IT!
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Old 05-01-2003, 01:22 PM   #4 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: Tempe, AZ
lol, very amusing! They always just get even more mad when you try revenge, though...
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Old 05-01-2003, 04:07 PM   #5 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Boone, NC
LOL, i like that one
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Old 05-01-2003, 04:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
Essen meine kurze Hosen
 
Location: NY Burbs
That was a shot across her bow. Just wait til she broadsides him.
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Old 05-01-2003, 05:17 PM   #7 (permalink)
Hiding Out
 
Definitely one of my favorites! But I don't think any man here would ever do that. We value our manhood.
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Old 05-01-2003, 09:53 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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Location: up north
ahahah!!! thats great@! i'd definately like to see that!
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Old 05-01-2003, 10:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
Crazy
 
lol great joke!
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Old 05-01-2003, 10:58 PM   #10 (permalink)
Crazy
 
-makes a couple notes so I dont forget to actualy try it-
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Old 05-01-2003, 11:22 PM   #11 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Who could EVER get away with that???
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Old 05-02-2003, 02:05 AM   #12 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: York
He's a braver man than me!!
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Old 05-02-2003, 03:03 AM   #13 (permalink)
Metal and Rock 4 Life
 
Destrox's Avatar
 
Location: Phoenix
All things in life have a sling shot effect....

Boy would I not want to get the reverse of what he just did to her.
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Old 05-02-2003, 04:03 AM   #14 (permalink)
Go faster!
 
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Location: Wisconsin
I've heard this before, but it's a classic. I love it! Thanx.
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Old 06-01-2003, 12:36 AM   #15 (permalink)
Loser
 
I've tried something like that before, and it works if you say your point after that gets their attention, then you got to do a little waht they say, and they do what you say.
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Old 06-01-2003, 03:51 AM   #16 (permalink)
The Matrix had a point...
 
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Moderator Emeritus
Location: 10th Mountain ASB Fort Drum, N.Y.
Understandable, but I'd doubt you'd make it into the evening..
Muchless, out the store.
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Old 06-01-2003, 09:26 AM   #17 (permalink)
Upright
 
Oh yeah, DEFINATELY not gonna try that...
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Old 06-01-2003, 10:54 AM   #18 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: NH
one of the funniest jokes i have ever heard!
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Old 06-01-2003, 12:43 PM   #19 (permalink)
Upright
 
excellent joke
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Old 06-01-2003, 12:58 PM   #20 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Where hockey pucks run rampant
Balls to the wall.

And what with his wife, they might be nailed that way after a stunt like that. Commendable in a twisted sort of way.
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Old 06-02-2003, 12:58 AM   #21 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Down Under
Love it!
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Old 06-02-2003, 01:00 AM   #22 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: chocolate city
That man is suicidal
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Old 06-02-2003, 04:25 AM   #23 (permalink)
Über-Rookie
 
Location: No longer, D.C
.... i could try it with someone elses wife... if i can run faster than she can*grin*
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Old 06-02-2003, 06:01 AM   #24 (permalink)
Crazy
 
most excellent, and damn good!!!, thanks for sharing!!!
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Old 06-02-2003, 06:05 AM   #25 (permalink)
Psycho
 
That is some funny stuff!!
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Old 06-02-2003, 10:43 AM   #26 (permalink)
Sky Piercer
 
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Location: Ireland
beautiful!
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Old 06-02-2003, 11:34 AM   #27 (permalink)
spurt king
 
Location: Out of my mind
If anyone here does attempt it, please bring a video camera and share with us that precious moment
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Old 06-02-2003, 03:44 PM   #28 (permalink)
The Cheshire Grin...
 
Location: An Aussie Outback
LOL
Gee that was a good one... hehe... try that on my GF.. noway I'd be hung out to dry..
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Old 06-02-2003, 04:35 PM   #29 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: Black Dog Bay, Alaska
VERY FUNNY....SUCH A BRAVE MAN
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Old 06-02-2003, 06:21 PM   #30 (permalink)
Psycho
 
Location: British Columbia
ooohh, thats a dangerous one
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Old 06-02-2003, 06:43 PM   #31 (permalink)
We're having potato pancakes!
 
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Location: stalag 13
good one!
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Old 06-02-2003, 06:52 PM   #32 (permalink)
Upright
 
ha
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Old 06-02-2003, 07:32 PM   #33 (permalink)
Upright
 
Terribly true!

The Darker Fire Within.
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Old 06-02-2003, 09:06 PM   #34 (permalink)
Junkie
 
That is great, she would tear him up
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Old 03-18-2004, 05:13 AM   #35 (permalink)
Insane
 
Foot ==> Crotch.
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