It starts... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

mrquackers · 08-06-2003, 03:45 AM

A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."

She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start."

This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts."

"That's it!" she screamed. "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"

The husband sighed, "Oh shit! It started..."

zaiaz · 08-06-2003, 04:08 AM

Heeheehee....did you have to start it again?

slant eyes · 08-06-2003, 07:17 AM

way cool man, that man has got balls.

tfpfreak · 08-06-2003, 08:17 AM

I saw this before but i love it thanks

Midlandmadman · 08-06-2003, 08:26 AM

atleast he go two beers in before it started!!!! hehehe

Regziever · 08-06-2003, 09:41 AM

Hahahaha!! Awesome!! hehe.. man that's a keeper!

ratbastid · 08-06-2003, 11:26 AM

Blaaaa haa ha!!!

But what does mrsquackers think of that joke?

mrquackers · 08-06-2003, 04:09 PM

Oh come on ratbastid! You really think I'm gonna show that to her??!??

Oh crap. She posts here! Love you Yoshi!

ratbastid · 08-06-2003, 05:49 PM

Speaking of which, I hope lurkette doesn't come across this joke....

Fortunately, she gets plenty of laffs from watching me stumble around. She doesn't come into Tilted Humor much.

Leviathan[NCV] · 08-06-2003, 05:56 PM

Haha.

baboora · 08-06-2003, 07:04 PM

huaehueahuaehuh...good one

Flesh · 08-06-2003, 07:10 PM

heheh

portieri · 08-06-2003, 07:35 PM

Welcome to my life.

bobw · 08-06-2003, 07:38 PM

PERFECT ......

Stare At The Sun · 08-06-2003, 11:05 PM

Very nice

I love jokes like that

loganmule · 08-07-2003, 05:30 AM

cute, and regrettably often true

red_zinfandel8 · 08-08-2003, 08:35 PM

it started all right - my chuckling

iktoweya · 08-09-2003, 12:22 AM

aarchaon · 03-19-2004, 03:53 AM

teseniarkc · 03-21-2004, 07:35 PM

It starts every 5 min. Thanks

diddagirl · 03-21-2004, 08:06 PM

hehe...got me's laughin

Boo · 03-21-2004, 08:18 PM

I like it, thanks!

tommy thompson · 03-21-2004, 08:31 PM

Well call me Shirley....that would have been really really really useful in my past relationship.

losthellhound · 03-22-2004, 04:50 PM

haha, I love it.. Id never do it, but I love it

Nancy · 03-23-2004, 05:56 AM

me and my co-workers loved it - keep 'em coming!

DDDDave · 03-23-2004, 08:11 AM

Hey !!!

I resemble that remark

johnsmith · 03-25-2004, 07:24 AM

This seems like the kind of thing you would read in a police report.

twilightfoix · 03-25-2004, 08:47 AM

he he, that's a good one

belicious · 03-25-2004, 12:17 PM

He was pushing it.....
THANKS.

Sticky · 03-15-2005, 02:06 PM

pretty funny

TexanAvenger · 03-15-2005, 06:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnsmith

This seems like the kind of thing you would read in a police report.

That was my thought on the subject...

bookie05 · 03-16-2005, 06:45 PM

jot that done in the jokes to pull on my future wife lol!

08-06-2003, 03:45 AM	#1 (permalink)
mrquackers Exhausted Location: Northeastern US - please send help!	It starts... A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts." She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start." This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts." "That's it!" she screamed. "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?" The husband sighed, "Oh shit! It started..."

08-06-2003, 04:08 AM	#2 (permalink)
zaiaz Psycho Location: State of confusion...wait that's medication.	Heeheehee....did you have to start it again? __________________ Self destruction - "Its my Nature", said the Scorpion...

08-06-2003, 07:17 AM	#3 (permalink)
slant eyes Psycho Location: cali	way cool man, that man has got balls. __________________ no man or woman is worth your tears - and the one who is, won't make you cry question authority, don't ask why, just do it!

08-06-2003, 08:17 AM	#4 (permalink)
tfpfreak Crazy Location: MS	I saw this before but i love it thanks __________________ Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be. ~ Clementine Paddleford

08-06-2003, 08:26 AM	#5 (permalink)
Midlandmadman Redwing fan extraordinaire Location: Michigan	atleast he go two beers in before it started!!!! hehehe __________________ Its good to be back.

08-06-2003, 09:41 AM	#6 (permalink)
Regziever Sexy eh? Location: Sweden	Hahahaha!! Awesome!! hehe.. man that's a keeper! __________________ Life is shit, Death is even worse, So what's the point of killing yourself? /Ignatius Camryn Paladine

08-06-2003, 11:26 AM	#7 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Blaaaa haa ha!!! But what does mrsquackers think of that joke?

08-06-2003, 04:09 PM	#8 (permalink)
mrquackers Exhausted Location: Northeastern US - please send help!	Oh come on ratbastid! You really think I'm gonna show that to her??!?? Oh crap. She posts here! Love you Yoshi! __________________ "If you're walking on thin ice, you may as well go ahead and dance."

08-06-2003, 05:49 PM	#9 (permalink)
ratbastid Darth Papa Location: Yonder	Speaking of which, I hope lurkette doesn't come across this joke.... Fortunately, she gets plenty of laffs from watching me stumble around. She doesn't come into Tilted Humor much.

08-06-2003, 05:56 PM	#10 (permalink)
Leviathan[NCV] Well... Location: afk	Haha.

08-06-2003, 07:04 PM	#11 (permalink)
baboora Tilted	huaehueahuaehuh...good one

08-06-2003, 07:35 PM	#13 (permalink)
portieri Tilted	Welcome to my life.

08-06-2003, 07:38 PM	#14 (permalink)
bobw Psycho Location: somewhere....	PERFECT ......

08-06-2003, 11:05 PM	#15 (permalink)
Stare At The Sun Eh? Location: Somewhere over the rainbow	Very nice I love jokes like that

08-07-2003, 05:30 AM	#16 (permalink)
loganmule Junkie Location: midwest	cute, and regrettably often true

08-08-2003, 08:35 PM	#17 (permalink)
red_zinfandel8 Upright	it started all right - my chuckling

08-09-2003, 12:22 AM	#18 (permalink)
iktoweya These pretzels are making me thirsty!! Location: 105B	hehe __________________ i miss K-Wise

03-19-2004, 03:53 AM	#19 (permalink)
aarchaon Insane	LOL __________________ Green. Yellow. Blue.

03-21-2004, 08:06 PM	#21 (permalink)
diddagirl Addict Location: Calgary, AB	hehe...got me's laughin __________________ "Is it so small a thing to have enjoyed the sun, to have lived long in the spring, to have loved, to have thought, to have done." -Matthew Arnold

03-21-2004, 07:35 PM	#20 (permalink)
teseniarkc Tilted	It starts every 5 min. Thanks

03-21-2004, 08:18 PM	#22 (permalink)
Boo Leave me alone! Location: Alaska, USA	I like it, thanks! __________________ Back button again, I must be getting old.

03-21-2004, 08:31 PM	#23 (permalink)
tommy thompson Psycho	Well call me Shirley....that would have been really really really useful in my past relationship. __________________ ...a wandering soul...

03-22-2004, 04:50 PM	#24 (permalink)
losthellhound Thats MR. Muffin Face now Location: Everywhere work sends me	haha, I love it.. Id never do it, but I love it __________________ "Life is possible only with illusions. And so, the question for the science of mental health must become an absolutely new and revolutionary one, yet one that reflects the essence of the human condition: On what level of illusion does one live?" -- Ernest Becker, The Denial of Death

03-23-2004, 05:56 AM	#25 (permalink)
Nancy Femme Fatale Location: Elysium	me and my co-workers loved it - keep 'em coming! __________________ I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

03-23-2004, 08:11 AM	#26 (permalink)
DDDDave Addict Location: Sarasota	Hey !!! I resemble that remark __________________ I am just a simple man trying to make my way in the universe... "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined." - Thoreau "Nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm" - Emerson

03-25-2004, 07:24 AM	#27 (permalink)
johnsmith Tilted Location: the Midwest	This seems like the kind of thing you would read in a police report.

03-25-2004, 08:47 AM	#28 (permalink)
twilightfoix Insane Location: in the clouds ;)	he he, that's a good one

03-25-2004, 12:17 PM	#29 (permalink)
belicious Addict	He was pushing it..... THANKS. __________________ Hey, now! You're an Allstar!

03-15-2005, 02:06 PM	#30 (permalink)
Sticky	pretty funny __________________ Sticky The Stickman

03-16-2005, 06:45 PM	#32 (permalink)
bookie05 Upright	jot that done in the jokes to pull on my future wife lol!