uncle phil

Strange, but Clever Advertising...

On a hospital door to the colonoscopy unit: "To expedite your visit, please back in."

On a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."

Sign over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

Another pizza shop slogan: "Buy our pizza. We knead the dough."

At a tire shop: "Invite us to your next blowout."

Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "Hello. Can we help pick your nose?"

At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We just want your tows."

On a taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."

In a podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."

At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet -- just miss a car payment."

At the electric company: "We would be de - lighted if you pay your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."

In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a propane filling station: "Tank heaven for little grills."

And don't forget the sign at a radiator shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

TIO

Nice one, Phil!
Got a few yuks there

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Strewth

mpedrummer2

"Tank heaven for little grills."

SUPERB.

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My sig can beat up your honor student.

hawkeye

those were good. thanks

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You're not fat,
You're just a giant ball
of love, covered in anger.

Slims

excellent, thanks.

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"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

egorey

hehehe.. clever.. thanks.

tfpfreak

nice thanks

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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be.

~ Clementine Paddleford

fester

some nice little gems - thanks

zaiaz

uncle phil you amaze me....no really you do.

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Self destruction - "Its my Nature", said the Scorpion...