All Your Emo Shit Goes Here
 

wild it's got it's own corner

Emo Corner - Emo Hair, Emo Pics, Emo Quotes, and Emo Poems

I can do some emo
without his consultation
phil, what the fuck's wrong?

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off. -- Emo Phillips

I'm putting this here to make sure people know that in this thread, this is NOT what we are doing:

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...ics8/emono.jpg

:love:

Consider yourself hugged.....

all of you,
all of the time.

I'm off to emote in other venues now.
I'll check out this Emo Phillips guy,
never heard of him before.

lovie kisses,
ring.

its what im doing.

http://cookingforbrevitt.typepad.com...d/emo_lawn.jpg

...talk about cutting, I'm posting this to point out that sometimes "emo" is misunderstood...though not in this thread I'm sure. So a "true-emo" doesn't want to cut and end it all...I think the point would be to stay alive so you can keep cutting and bleeding every day. Ending it is chicken shit, not emo shit.

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...29778578_l.jpg

well, these days you can cut and cleanse with ease.

random knicks and cuts with no infections.

http://fetosoap.com/shop/images/razor.jpg

now thats emo friendly.

...this thread makes me so happy

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...cs8/emocry.gif

Was this thread supposed to be about Emo Phillips? If not...

http://web.archive.org/web/19960101-...s/emo_baby.jpg

otto,

you're making all the emo's cry ...very very very sad....you spelled it with two L's when it only has one. I could just kill myself :(

Emo Philips

argh.... banishment is too good. :sad:

...and always remember the last words of my grandfather, who said, "A truck!" -- Emo Phillips

I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well." -- Emo Phillips

Thanks phil....I suck at remembering jokes, but I will surely remember that one.
It me had me chuckling but good.

Good good good good good!

Since I still own them money for '07, I might try to use this one:

"I got a letter from the IRS. Apparently I owe them $800. So I sent them a letter back. I said, "If you'll remember, I fastened my return with a paper clip, which according to your very own latest government pentagon spending figures will more than make up for the difference."
Emo Philips.

The toughest time...in anyone's life...is when you have to kill a loved one just because they're the devil. -- Emo Phillips

Is it possible, that E.Phillips could be George Carlin's son?

I ran three miles today, finally I said "lady take your purse." -- Emo Phillips
-----Added 22/9/2008 at 04 : 21 : 52-----
http://i313.photobucket.com/albums/l...ettler/Emo.jpg

I'm a great lover, I'll bet... -- Emo Phillips

"Women: You can't live with them, and you can't get them to dress up in a skimpy little Nazi costume and beat you with a warm squash or something..."
Emo Philips

Okay ..a bit off topic here. but who was that comic strip old woman
who had a bit of an attitude,
she would have great one-liners while sipping her coffee dressed in...
well..old lady type clothing I spose.

heh heh heh...my "change of life is now complete. I really haven't changed all that much,
'cept the hot flashes have subsided, and contrary to popular belief,
I have no trouble whatsoever becoming lubricated.

wow ..that was me talking..and now even further off topic.
Sorry...let's get back to the Emo person.

first off.. how the hell did I miss this thread?? EMO <3 baby

I remember that lady you're talking about..she's all over hallmark cards

Is this the one you mean?
http://thumb7.webshots.net/t/36/37/4...7czEIEn_th.jpg

MAXINE pictures from jokes & humor photos on webshots

maxine is hardly emo...

Winnie the Poo is emo too

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...o-bullshit.jpg

Maxine emotes.
I'm confused I 'spose.
I lied.

Hallmark....now that deserves a vilification thread all its own.

gotta go...
the dog I reside with just gave me a 'look.'

True dat but the lady in #25 reminded us of maxine anyway ...

People come up to me and say, "Emo, do people really come up to you?" -- Emo Phillips

my boyfriend's emo 80s look. teh original emo, thank you very much.

Why do you guys have to be so full of hate? Why?


/end emo

I'm going to write a song about this thread.. in the dark.. and stain the paper with my mascara filled tears.

I am an oldish fart to some, being almost fifty years old.

Does this new term 'Emo' mean relishing in self pity?,
and there are dollars to be made from it?


I hate the the haters.

Irony has many wrinkles.

Emo: a musical genre/ scene that has almost 1000 definitions in urban dictionary most of which are making fun of it.

Supposedly rooted in early punk rock but today's version is a sort of goth-broody-metrosexual-depressing rock song scene. It encompasses just about anything you want to make fun of.

emu poop and a pigeon.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3210/...fe9e4e8a12.jpg

oops, sorry... emo, not emu.

I am sad, very sad sad sad...the first page of this thread was my favorite and now we're on the second page...I could just cut and kill myself

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...loodbanner.jpg

Heh...I don't even have to say it.
Isn't it amazing how much you can say with your eyes?

The next time anyone ever asks me,
"How many languages do you speak?"

I might shrug my shoulders,
I may blush,
cross my arms and legs,
sigh and look towards the ceiling,
perhaps I will smile,
tap my pencil,
use one of a hundred different flavors of sighs,
I dunno.
Oh yes I do.

Emoting Happens,
I make fun with it.

People come up to me and they're worried...that I'll reproduce. -- Emo Phillips

Could this be Andy Kaufman's son?

Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps. -- Emo Phillips

It's Friday again ...TEIF...and Al, too. Double shot of my baby's love:

I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy. -- Emo Phillips

Emo Eco

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...matechange.jpg

http://content.pyzam.com/funnypics/animals/emo.jpg

http://digitalcypher.com/random/moms-minivan.jpg

I'll be right back. I'm gonna go cut myself.

I was walking down the street, something caught my eye...and dragged it fifteen feet. -- Emo Phillips

some emo essential viewing... I guess :

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...etiq/emo-9.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...inding-emo.png

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...hetiq/elmo.gif

I went into Gus's artificial organ and taco stand. I said "Give me a bladder por favor." The guy said "Is that to go?" I said, "Well what else would I want it for?" -- Emo Phillips

I am NOT emo. :cry:

You know, a lot of girls go out with me just to further their careers...damn anthropologists. -- Emo Phillips

How to find out if you're emo.

Emo Quiz - How Emo Are You?

How to stop being emo.

How to Stop Being an Emo Kid - wikiHow

I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky...but there wasn't any gum under any of them. -- Emo Phillips

Uncle Phil... how did you develop such a keen eye for mocking social trends far below your intellectual level?

it's a gift...

when i first found it on my doorstep, wrapped in starburst paper and tied with rainbow ribbon, i had to pinch myself and double-check to make sure it wasn't on fire (i was barefoot at the time)...

The other day a woman came up to me and said, "Didn't I see you on television?" I said, "I don't know. You can't see out the other way." -- Emo Phillips

Has anyone else here noticed that emo spelled backwards is ome?!!!

That sure answers one of my questions.

Emo Phillips was pulled over in Massachusetts for reckless driving. When brought before the judge, Emo was asked if he knew what the punishment for drunk driving in that state was. His reply: "I don't know, re-election to the Senate?"

I love to go down to the schoolyard and watch all the little children jump up and down and run around yelling and screaming...They don't know I'm only using blanks. -- Emo Phillips

I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, "Get off me, you two!" -- Emo Phillips

Sometimes I wish I was a cat :(

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g2...shIwasacat.jpg

At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. -- Emo Phillips

We went back to her apartment and went inside and she took off all her clothes and said, "It's your move," So I sacrificed her poodle to Zoltar the Space God.

- Got to love Emo

Conjuring the Ultimate Emo Rock President:

http://www.centertheatregroup.org/up...nOWFeature.pdf

and "tommy" would be the ultimate emo rock opera?

"see me, feel me, touch me, heal me..."

I went to school, you know. I was in grammar school. Once we were taking a test. I was copying this other kid's paper, and I guess the teacher heard my Xerox machine. And she said, "Emo, am I stupid or were you cheating?" I said, "Ah, yes and no."

She sends me to the principal, and I get to his office and I sit down and he looks at me and says, "Emo, Emo, Emo." I said, "I'm the one in the middle, you drunken slob." He said, "How would you like to repeat the fifth grade?" I said, "Well, I don't know if I could do it exactly, uh, but I'll try." He said, "I could expel you!" I said, "You'll have to catch and eat me first, ya wierdo!" He said, "Emo, you have to go over to the school psychologist." I said, "Why do I have to go to the school psychologist?" So he shows me the petition.

And I go over to the psychologist, and he says, "Emo, what does this inkblot look like to you?" I said, "Oh, it's kind of embarrassing." He said, "Emo, everyone sees something, so don't be embarrassed. Tell me what the inkblot looks like to you." I said, "Well, to me it looks like standard pattern #3 in the Rorschach series to test obsessive compulsiveness." And he gets kind of depressed. I said, "Okay, it's a butterfly." And he cheers up. He said, "What does this inkblot look like?" I said, "It looks like a horrible ugly blob of pure evil that sucks the souls of man into a vortex of sin and degradation." He said, "No, um, the inkblot's over there. That's a photo of my wife you're looking at." "Oh," I said, "was I far off?" He said, "No. That's the sad part."

And he gives me a chocolate Easter bunny. And this shows how tricky those guys are. I eat the chocolate and I think, wait a second... this isn't around Easter. "Was this a test?" He said, "Yes." "And what does it mean?" He said, "Well, had you eaten the ears first you would have been normal; had you eaten the feet first you would have had an inferiority complex; had you eaten the tail first you would have had latent homosexual tendencies; and had you eaten the breasts first you would have had a latent oedipal complex." I said, "Well, go on. What does it mean when you bite out the eyes and scream, 'Stop staring at me!'?'" He says, "It shows you've a tendency towards self-destruction." I said, "What do you recommend?" He says, "Go for it!"

Actually, Quadrophenia is probably more emo than Tommy. I'd have to read the liner notes again to argue it effectively, and this being nonsense, that would be inappropriate.

She had a heart shaped face. Not like the valentine; like the organ. Lopsided with veins all over it.

Once I went to the library. I said, "I'd like a book on the Heimlich anti-choking maneuver," and the guy said, "look at the card catalog. I'm busy." So I go to the card catalog. I look under Heimlich and choking and maneuver. It's not any of those places. And I see this first aid book with the section and I take it and that guy said, "It's a reference book. You can't take it out; you have to Xerox it." I said, "Do you have change for a dollar?" He said, "It's not a bank, it's a library." So I go tho this souvenir stand and I said, "Do you have change for a dollar?" They said, "It's not a bank, it's a souvenir stand." So I go to this bank, and they said, "Yes, this is a bank." And they give me the change and I come back to it. And by this time there's a line of students Xeroxing their books or whatever and I -- finally I Xerox the Heimlich. As I go back the guy says, "Put it back, now that you've used it." So I put it back. And as I leave, he says, "Thank you." I said, "Well, thank you! I'm never coming to this barn again." And I went back to my car. Now by this time, my sister's almost purple from the chicken bone...

Your Guide on How To Be Emo

http://www.hardgeus.com/updateimages...hilips_old.jpg
http://www.pixyland.org/peterpan/palmbeach/pixie1.jpg
Sometimes, no matter how much one loves them, it's hard to not be disappointed in one's offspring.

I was a cute baby. My mom said when I was born they threw away the mold. Some of it grew back...

New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him.

I was sitting in the park....
Minding my Own business.....
Starting at peoples' HEADs and trying to make their BRAINS Explode.

/ Thanks phil. This thread never fails to cheer me up.
// How Emo is that?