aphroditeskiss1

So today, I went to the gyno. Not that big of a deal. I have ovarian cysts, and I thought they were acting up or something, so I went in to have it checked out. Then my doc tells me there's a fairly high chance it could be uterine cancer, given what I've told her and my family history. So now I get to wait until the Pap smear comes back and hope to all things holy that it's normal and it's just some weird little glitch. Now I'm terrified. I know I need to slow down and just take it step by step, but it's freakin' hard to do. I'm really scared. Have any of you been through this??

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"You always said destiny would blow me away. But nothing's gonna blow me away"- Something Coporate
" I do not pop pills! I take them and I eat them..."
- Foamy's friend

pinkie

8 years ago, for about 2 ½ years I was involved in activities that put me at risk for HIV. I was so scared of dying, especially after Xyla's daddy was killed, that I put off getting tested until March of this year, and I was a wreck until I got the results. All 8 years! They came back negative, thank God. But I know how it feels to be in that high risk factor, and be terrified, for sure. I really support you, and you'll get through this. My doctors gave me Diazepam, perhaps you could get something for anxiety also?

The most recent time was going in to the Women's Health Center at the hospital for an ultrasound on some fibrocystic breast changes, and an exam for my chronic uterine pain. I was sure there was something terrible wrong, I was scared, but got to a point of acceptance, and felt better. In my mind, worst case scenario, I die and that would mean leaving my daughter. That thought alone breaks my heart and scares me to know end, but a life lived in fear is not living.

lurkette

When I was 17, I found a lump in my breast and I was TERRIFIED. Even though the doctor told me it was probably benign, I had to have surgery and was horribly anxious till the results came back. Turned out to be just a fibrous cyst, but the chances of having another one are pretty high, and given the fact that I'm getting older I'm terrified of either finding another one and having to worry that it's cancer, or having one mask an actual cancerous lump.

A lot of people have to go through this, and the bottom line is that it sucks. Just try to keep on an even keel and not worry about something you can't prevent or control. Try to be present in the moment and enjoy what your doing for its own sake. If you find yourself fixated on the "what if's" of the situation, find a sympathetic ear to vent to. Take care of yourself, and know that we're here for you.

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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

Squishor

I was diagnosed with overian cysts about 15 years ago, after having some pain during sex. It seemed to be a fairly big deal, although I don't recall being told I was high risk for cancer. But guess what? I did nothing and they apparently just went away on their own. I haven't really had a problem since.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, one of my co-workers found out she had advanced ovarian cancer earlier this year. She had to have surgery and they weren't able to get all of it because it had spread throughout her abdomen, into her fatty tissues, etc. She refused to accept it as a death sentence, although she did her best to prepare if it was going to be. She is over 50 and did not have a very good prognosis at all. But guess what? She just finished a course of chemotherapy and is currently disease-free!

Janey

yesterday i had a biopsy done on my right breast. It hurts like hell now, and i am VERY nervous. they found some quote 'suspicious micro calcification' in an earlier mammogram. I had a mammogram done because for the past few months, i've been noticing a dispersed lumpy hardness in the lower inside part of my right breast.

correct that earlier statment, I'm NOT very nervous. I'm very scared.

Hang in there girl.

Grasshopper Green

I too found a lump in my breast when I was younger, and I was scared to death. My mom was even more scared than me so I had to be strong for her sake; she's a worry wart anyway. Just keep calm, I know it's hard to do, but making yourself sick with worry isn't going to help matters anyway. Take heart in the fact that you were proactive about your health. How long do you have to wait for the results to come back? I know I'm kind of new, but I know that the ladies on the board will be here for you if you need to talk, I know I certainly will be!!

Keeping my fingers crossed for good news.

ninnycode

My mother was diagnosed with uterine cancer a couple years ago. She hadn't been for a pap smear in probably 20 years. She had a complete hysterectomy, and her doctor said they got all of the cancer. No need for radiation or chemo. She was very lucky. The doctor said that she had a very slow growing cancer, and that it was contained in the uterus, but that it had probably been growing for years. It was a very difficult time for our whole family, and I feel for you. My only advice is to rely on your friends and family. You need the love and support from them now, more than ever. My thoughts are with you for a positive outcome on your pap test.

aphroditeskiss1

Thank you so much to all of you. It's going to be about a week before the results of the pap are in. I'm trying so hard to keep my mind off of it. So far, besides all of you, the only person I've let know is Cpugamerbb. I don't know what I'd do without him. I haven't told my mom or my family because my grandfather has been going throughalot (he's had 3 hospiltalizations in the last year) and my father has MS, so I don't want to worry them about it until I know for sure something is wrong, so I really need you all now. Thanks, again, so much for being here for me. I will let you all know as soon as I find anything out.

__________________
"You always said destiny would blow me away. But nothing's gonna blow me away"- Something Coporate
" I do not pop pills! I take them and I eat them..."
- Foamy's friend

Redgirl

Hang in there Aphrodite! That really sucks that it takes so long for results. I was surprised at the number of ladies who said they had gone thru something similar.

My mom has a very slowly growing brian tumor that's eventually going to make her blind. Already her peripheral vision is shrinking and since it's on her pituitary it fucks with all her hormones. It's not going to kill her, but it's not going to make her life any easier when she's older either. I try not to think about it, because there's nothing we can do. It's inoperable.

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Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

SparklingDot

My mom went though something like that. She went in for her annual pap and they found some "suspicious cells" possibly cancerous or precancerous. So she went in for a biopsy, and the cells were still not to the doctor's liking. So finally she went in and had the cells frozen (think wart removal type method). All this has taken place over the past 6 months. She has been waiting for results and worrying for that long. Its hard, but you aren't alone.

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17 seconds is all you really need
- Smashing Pumpkins

thubpt

Hey sweetie - not trying to downplay - just trying to help you ground yourself. - My gyno has told me time and again that uterine cancer is NOT hereditary. I just had a run in with possible cervical cancer, and from experience, the best thing is definitely to take it one day at a time, as all of our lovely ladies have already stated. And remember - science is advancing so fast, it's amazing the things you can recover from that our grandmothers would have not had a chance with! Our prayers are with you - love and a lot of hugs!!!!!!

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The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

--Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

lurkette

So...any news?

__________________
"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."

- Anatole France

aphroditeskiss1

Yeah. Not unexpectidly, the pap came back abnormal, and they are going to do a biopsy and also an ultrasound within the next two weeks or so. I will keep you all posted.

__________________
"You always said destiny would blow me away. But nothing's gonna blow me away"- Something Coporate
" I do not pop pills! I take them and I eat them..."
- Foamy's friend

raeanna74

I'll keep you in my prayers. Sending you well wishes. It's good that they ARE checking things and sticking with you to investigate this completely. It's your best chance of not having an even worse situation. This way they can catch it earlier and treat it SHOULD anything end up showing up.

I had a scare like this once. One thing that helped me get through it and face it without so much anxiety was to inform myself. Look up the information on WebMD or other reputable medical sites. You may find out that fewer people than you think end up having a serious situation if it's caught by a certain stage. Then you don't have as much to fear.

Hugs!

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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

amonkie

Hang in there - I'm just on the end of the same sort of treatment setup, and the biopsy is definitely uncomfortable, but if you take some advil before you go, that'll help tremendously. Your doctor should have information for you about the procedures so you can keep yourself informed.

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Calling from deep in the heart, from where the eyes can't see and the ears can't hear, from where the mountain trails end and only love can go... ~~~ Three Rivers Hare Krishna

pinkie

You have my thoughts and prayers.

little_tippler

I'm sorry to hear about your results...we're with you all the way. Hope you'll be alright. Courage.

__________________
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918