pinkie

8 years ago, for about 2 ½ years I was involved in activities that put me at risk for HIV. I was so scared of dying, especially after Xyla's daddy was killed, that I put off getting tested until March of this year, and I was a wreck until I got the results. All 8 years! They came back negative, thank God. But I know how it feels to be in that high risk factor, and be terrified, for sure. I really support you, and you'll get through this. My doctors gave me Diazepam, perhaps you could get something for anxiety also?

The most recent time was going in to the Women's Health Center at the hospital for an ultrasound on some fibrocystic breast changes, and an exam for my chronic uterine pain. I was sure there was something terrible wrong, I was scared, but got to a point of acceptance, and felt better. In my mind, worst case scenario, I die and that would mean leaving my daughter. That thought alone breaks my heart and scares me to know end, but a life lived in fear is not living.