Men? Boys? I'm thinking the second. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

jRuntlets · 03-12-2007, 06:33 PM

Hey gals!
Lately I've gone on three dates... in the past two months, with two different guys. I'm beginning to wonder if there's something wrong with me or the guys I've gone out with have been complete morons. Can some of you give me some insight here?

-Keep in mind. I'm 21, I go to college, I am self employed doing two different jobs, I have my own interests, and I'm self sufficent.

Guy 1 - We had chatted a bit prior to him asking me out. We went out and had a spactular time. After the date we talked through out our busy week. He was going out of town the next weekend and set up a date for the following Monday. He even decided what to do/where to go. He said for me to call him when I was finished with school and we'd go out. I called, no answer, left a message... no call back. However, we do frequent the same club and all he does is LOOK at me! He's been telling friends that I stood him up. I find it really hard to believe that my caller ID number and my message disappeared.

Guy 2- A blind date that went famously. We ended up talking about anything and everything and found that we have similar interests. At the end of the date he set up the second date a week later. Date two goes extremely well, he takes me home and there's the awkward "I want to kiss you" aura which he eventually calls me later in the evening to say that he didn't want to seem like he was jumping the gun by making a move. He says we'll go out later in the week to a specific place. No call to schedule. Nothing.

Am I just hit with bad luck? Personally, I don't care about the guys themselves just the fact that people are too stupid to say they're not interested. What's going on here?

sillygirl · 03-12-2007, 07:30 PM

How long has it been since you thought guy 2 would call? Why not call him? I space out even the most important of events sometimes when I'm busy.

jRuntlets · 03-12-2007, 08:43 PM

It's been a week yesterday that guy 2 said he'd call. I called him Friday figuring he got busy (since he's also a student) to check in, left a breif "hey what's up? How's your week?" kind of message, and I haven't heard anything... which leads me to believe I won't hear anything.

ngdawg · 03-12-2007, 09:29 PM

Cell phone messages do get lost...I was called into work, but never got the message(that's happened twice, no caller ID, nothing showing the calls got through).
With guy #1, if you frequent the same places, you should tell him you did call, but didn't hear back. (hindsight is always 20/20-you probably should have just gone to where you'd decided on or called him a second time that evening).
With #2, call again this Friday or Thursday(more likely to not be out somewhere on a Thursday), stating you weren't sure your message got sent.
If they're not interested, they're not interested, but wondering without follow-up at least once each won't do a thing.
Then again, if you don't 'care about the guys themselves', why are you concerned they'd care about you?

jRuntlets · 03-13-2007, 11:43 AM

I meant care in the sense that I don't know them well enough to be really broken up about the whole situation.

Guy 1 has turned out to be an idoit from current events - so I really don't want that. Current events lead me to believe there was no misunderstanding and he is just an ass.

As for guy 2, I gave him a courtsey call last friday. I'll follow up later this week by asking the mutual friend of ours who set us up if something went down with him. I figure one call as a follow up is enough, if he's too busy or not interested enough in returning the call then it's not worth it.

I've always been taught not to fight when there's nothing to fight for. It would have been one thing if I had been seeing either of these guys for several months... but I wasn't. I was just wanting some imput from everyone on weather this is the norm for men now a days?

ngdawg · 03-13-2007, 12:51 PM

*shrug* All the men I know are much older, so no....
I'm still of the thought though, that you should consider your messages didn't get through.

hunnychile · 03-13-2007, 01:42 PM

Sorry but they really aren't that interested. If so you would have received a call - or two.

Move on to greener pastures. Perhaps you've been giving out the wrong vibe and they're scared to pursue.

Who knows? Life is short, I'd meet others more reliable personally.

03-12-2007, 06:33 PM	#1 (permalink)
jRuntlets Crazy	Men? Boys? I'm thinking the second. Hey gals! Lately I've gone on three dates... in the past two months, with two different guys. I'm beginning to wonder if there's something wrong with me or the guys I've gone out with have been complete morons. Can some of you give me some insight here? -Keep in mind. I'm 21, I go to college, I am self employed doing two different jobs, I have my own interests, and I'm self sufficent. Guy 1 - We had chatted a bit prior to him asking me out. We went out and had a spactular time. After the date we talked through out our busy week. He was going out of town the next weekend and set up a date for the following Monday. He even decided what to do/where to go. He said for me to call him when I was finished with school and we'd go out. I called, no answer, left a message... no call back. However, we do frequent the same club and all he does is LOOK at me! He's been telling friends that I stood him up. I find it really hard to believe that my caller ID number and my message disappeared. Guy 2- A blind date that went famously. We ended up talking about anything and everything and found that we have similar interests. At the end of the date he set up the second date a week later. Date two goes extremely well, he takes me home and there's the awkward "I want to kiss you" aura which he eventually calls me later in the evening to say that he didn't want to seem like he was jumping the gun by making a move. He says we'll go out later in the week to a specific place. No call to schedule. Nothing. Am I just hit with bad luck? Personally, I don't care about the guys themselves just the fact that people are too stupid to say they're not interested. What's going on here? __________________ Horses come and go, but some leave permanent hoof prints on your life.

03-12-2007, 07:30 PM	#2 (permalink)
sillygirl Newlywed Location: at home	How long has it been since you thought guy 2 would call? Why not call him? I space out even the most important of events sometimes when I'm busy. __________________ Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken ....absence makes me miss him more...

03-12-2007, 08:43 PM	#3 (permalink)
jRuntlets Crazy	It's been a week yesterday that guy 2 said he'd call. I called him Friday figuring he got busy (since he's also a student) to check in, left a breif "hey what's up? How's your week?" kind of message, and I haven't heard anything... which leads me to believe I won't hear anything. __________________ Horses come and go, but some leave permanent hoof prints on your life.

03-12-2007, 09:29 PM	#4 (permalink)
ngdawg peekaboo Location: on the back, bitch	Cell phone messages do get lost...I was called into work, but never got the message(that's happened twice, no caller ID, nothing showing the calls got through). With guy #1, if you frequent the same places, you should tell him you did call, but didn't hear back. (hindsight is always 20/20-you probably should have just gone to where you'd decided on or called him a second time that evening). With #2, call again this Friday or Thursday(more likely to not be out somewhere on a Thursday), stating you weren't sure your message got sent. If they're not interested, they're not interested, but wondering without follow-up at least once each won't do a thing. Then again, if you don't 'care about the guys themselves', why are you concerned they'd care about you? __________________ Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

03-13-2007, 11:43 AM	#5 (permalink)
jRuntlets Crazy	I meant care in the sense that I don't know them well enough to be really broken up about the whole situation. Guy 1 has turned out to be an idoit from current events - so I really don't want that. Current events lead me to believe there was no misunderstanding and he is just an ass. As for guy 2, I gave him a courtsey call last friday. I'll follow up later this week by asking the mutual friend of ours who set us up if something went down with him. I figure one call as a follow up is enough, if he's too busy or not interested enough in returning the call then it's not worth it. I've always been taught not to fight when there's nothing to fight for. It would have been one thing if I had been seeing either of these guys for several months... but I wasn't. I was just wanting some imput from everyone on weather this is the norm for men now a days? __________________ Horses come and go, but some leave permanent hoof prints on your life.

03-13-2007, 12:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
ngdawg peekaboo Location: on the back, bitch	shrug All the men I know are much older, so no.... I'm still of the thought though, that you should consider your messages didn't get through. __________________ Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em.

03-13-2007, 01:42 PM	#7 (permalink)
hunnychile Alien Anthropologist Location: Between Boredom and Nirvana	Sorry but they really aren't that interested. If so you would have received a call - or two. Move on to greener pastures. Perhaps you've been giving out the wrong vibe and they're scared to pursue. Who knows? Life is short, I'd meet others more reliable personally. __________________ "I need compassion, understanding and chocolate." - NJB