Fat Man Skinny Wife... - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Cynthetiq · 08-18-2005, 08:06 AM

Quote:

Beauty and the Beast
Why are fat sitcom husbands paired with great-looking wives?
By Matt Feeney
Posted Wednesday, Jan. 5, 2005, at 10:46 AM PT

In two decades of TV acting, Courtney Thorne-Smith has never stopped looking like a cheerleader. She has the kind of large, startled eyes that suggest school spirit (this look of bug-eyed alacrity grew to almost supernatural intensity during her starvation years on Ally McBeal) and a sturdy jaw that appears custom-tooled for the cheerleader's main task of spelling out inspirational words very, very loudly. But for Cheryl, Smith's character in the ABC series According to Jim (Tuesdays, 9 p.m. ET), it's as if her cheerleaderly aspirations have suffered a perverse cosmic scramble and she ended up married not to the equally simple and beautiful quarterback everyone expected her to marry, but to the boorish, buffalo-faced center who puts his hands between his expansive ass cheeks on every play. Cheryl is married to Jim, and Jim is played by Jim Belushi.

It's a family sitcom tradition that spouses are ill-matched looks-wise, but until recently, the mismatch has usually consisted of a beautiful actress, whose glamour is partly obscured behind the clutter of everyday life, and a comparatively plain actor. Think golden-haired Meredith Baxter Birney and undistinguished Michael Gross on Family Ties or dishy Suzanne Pleshette and the comically featureless Bob Newhart in the original Bob Newhart Show. In these sitcom marriages, the husband was at least shown to compensate for his obvious lack of studliness by being what Tony Soprano would call a good earner—or at the very least a mensch.

In the current sitcom lineup, by contrast, several shows pair extremely attractive women, who are often clad in plunging tops and tight jeans suitable for a Maxim photo spread, with TV husbands who are not only not studly, but downright fat, and a couple who are not only not mensches, but are ugly on the inside, too. On The King of Queens (CBS, Wednesdays, 9 p.m. ET), smoldering working-class babe Carrie (Leah Remini) is paired with beer-gutted Doug (Kevin James). On Grounded for Life (WB, Fridays, 8:30 p.m. ET), the lovely, voluptuous Claudia (Megyn Price—my favorite), is paired with the dumpy and scraggly-bearded Sean (Donal Logue). Perhaps the most jarringly incongruous couple appears on Still Standing (CBS, Mondays, 8 p.m. ET), in which Judy (legendary '80s hottie Jamie Gertz) is married to the surly Bill (rotund, high-voiced English actor Mark Addy, whose character sounds just a little too English to be from Chicago). Bill is a scurrilous (and not terribly funny) creation, unpleasant even to listen to.

In addition to their girth, a signal characteristic of these men is immaturity. Most of them are unable to master the simplest daily tasks. A recent episode of Grounded for Life was propelled by Sean's inability to take a phone message while a typical King of Queens knee-slapper was fueled by Doug's inability to keep his hands off a co-worker's Koosh ball, which he, of course, loses. And virtually every episode of According to Jim is sparked by Jim's selfishness and impulsiveness—he fights with Santa and the next-door neighbor; he pouts about having to give up his vices so Cheryl can get pregnant. Indeed, the promixity of these men to their childhood selves is often directly invoked. In a recent episode of King of Queens, for example, Doug's dad visits for a model train convention, which dredges up bitter memories about how as a child, Doug was not allowed—I am not making this up—to play with his dad's train. When Dad is called away from the convention and Doug offers to fill in for him, Dad is still reluctant to let his dumb-ass son work the controls. (And when he does, Doug promptly destroys the train set, along with its fake mountain landscape setting. See what happens when you play with Daddy's train?) Perhaps, then, actors like Mark Addy and Kevin James are best suited for these roles not only because they portray a fantasy life for couch potato male viewers—for a half-hour a week, you can be 300 pounds and still imagine yourself married to Jamie Gertz!—but also because their proportions, with their ample torsos and short and apparently useless limbs, approximate those of babies.

It's not that there aren't handsome or sexually desirable men on sitcoms, but these men are typically marked as terminal bachelors, like Ted Danson on Cheers. To the extent they have anything to do with family life, they tend to skulk around its outer margins like coyotes. On Two and Half Men (CBS, Mondays, 9:30 p.m. ET), Charlie (Charlie Sheen) is handsome, successful, and wedded to promiscuous bachelorhood, but he gets to enjoy some nourishing familial scraps since his loser brother (Jon Cryer) and scampy nephew moved themselves into his pad. (In keeping with the Maxim ethos of these shows, the brother was abandoned by a woman who thinks she might be a lesbian. It would be emasculating for male viewers to see a man dumped for being completely undesirable, and, besides, lesbians are so hot.) Likewise, on Grounded for Life the schlumpy husband has a smoother bachelor brother, Eddie (Kevin Corrigan), who lurks around the house and functions as a Casanova alter ego. This really works in Grounded for Life, thanks to the slithery Corrigan, who is probably the best thing about any of these shows. (On According to Jim and Still Standing, the single sibling is an attractive but romantically hopeless sister of the wife. That's the choice: fat guy vs. spinsterhood.)

Since these pairings could not conceivably reflect the sexual or romantic desires of the female protagonists, they look a bit like arranged marriages. Yet in arranged marriages the pairing generally springs from a glut of intention—the long-term planning of parents, future in-laws, and other relatives. The sitcom pairing, by contrast, reflects the absence of intention, some past moment in which fate seems to have arbitrarily asserted itself. It's not the merciless fate of tragedy, but a kind of blind and stupid fate, a fate that a person can—with enough forbearance and, yes, laughter—live with. The back story in Grounded for Life is that Sean got Claudia pregnant when they were teenagers and they decided to get married and have the baby. In Still Standing, the greater unfathomableness of the marriage requires an even more perverse set of circumstances to explain it. This explanation arrives at the beginning of one episode when Bill, after directing a morning greeting to his wife and children, turns his malevolence on his sister-in-law. "Hello, loved ones … and tolerated one," he says, and she retorts, "Hello, lifelong consequence of my sister's attempt to make another man jealous." The best-laid plans … end up with Jamie Gertz married to Mark Addy.

It's tempting to register a feminist complaint about the message these shows convey—that they perpetuate the view that women shouldn't expect autonomy or fulfillment in romance and marriage. They do, after all, play to a certain male fantasy: living the gluttonous, irresponsible, self-absorbed life of an infant and basking in the unconditional love of a good-looking woman.

But it's not just men watching these shows, and, as Alessandra Stanley suggested in a review of the country western sitcom Rodney, it's not just a male id they express. As the bitter, recent book The Bitch in the House and the extreme popularity of the delightful, tendentious Desperate Housewives seem to indicate, the war of the sexes has shifted from the workplace back to the household and the bedroom. In portraying husbands as lousy parents, marginal breadwinners, and repellant sexual partners, the fat-husband sitcoms convey a persecution fantasy that rises from the same swamp of resentments as these books do: "Yes, I'm supercompetent and I even look great, despite all the crap I have to deal with, and, yes, that's my husband over there, the fat, useless one scratching his nuts."

If family sitcoms really are a Rorschach blot for their male and female viewers, then we're either in really bad shape or coping surprisingly well—in the same scenarios in which women perhaps identify their own desperation and martyrdom, men seem to find sweet, elemental fulfillment.

Matt Feeney is a freelance writer in Oakland, Calif. He can be reached at mattfeen@hotmail.com.

LINK

There's an episode of <a href="http://www.nbc.com/Will_&_Grace/index.html">Will & Grace</a> where Karen and Jack are watching TV flipping through the channels. As they flip through the channels, they exclaim,"Fat man, skinny wife, fat man, skinny wife," and I started to wonder about it. I thought, "Ooh King of Queens, Still Standing, According to Jim... etc." It just dawned on me, "Honymooners." Ralph Kramden and Alice Kramden... the original "Fat man skinny wife."

<blockquote><a href="http://cityrag.blogs.com/main/2005/08/chunky_hunky.html">chunky hunky </a>
<a href="http://fourfour.typepad.com/" target="_blank">fourfour</a> spy cams the Jersey shore and comes back with killer photos and the definitive post on lusting after chunky guys in - <a href="http://fourfour.typepad.com/fourfour/2005/08/endless_chunk.html" target="_blank">Endless Chunk</a>. a fantastic read!... "South Jersey is a haven for (or maybe our nation's capital of) the slightly overweight, so having been raised there, it's probably no coincidence that I dig stocky guys."<img title="Chunk_hunk" height="161" alt="Chunk_hunk" src="http://cityrag.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/chunk_hunk.jpg" width="358" border="0" />coincidentally, Playgirl has an article this month that chubby guys are in. as <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/front/story/338038p-288635c.html" target="_blank">the NY Daily News wrote today</a>... "Forget waxed chests and rock-hard abs. A new survey finds ladies like their men scruffy, a wee bit chubby - and definitely not a metrosexual."
</blockquote>

Well at least I don't need to worry about going to the gym.....

shesus · 08-18-2005, 09:37 AM

But then there's Roseanne and Dan Connors. They were both hefty people...

I hate the steroetypes presented by the media. Wome have to be skinny, in-shape, and flawless while the guys can be proud of a beer gut and being out of shape.

/me will wait to watch tv when the pendulum swings and real women are portrayed on tv

ophelia783 · 08-18-2005, 09:54 AM

I agree with ohh_shesus; I find it incredible how bigger men are portrayed with small women, and are considered by many to be sexy.

Bigger women are usually the quirky best friend, who can never find love and who's always eating. Men are usually harassed for finding bigger girls attractive (some of my exes have been).

joofoo · 08-18-2005, 10:01 AM

I have to agree the shows mentioned bother me on some level. Being that my wife and I are on the 'chubby side'. I personally don't watch any of those shows, but not for that reason, I just don't like them all that much.

bettaa · 08-18-2005, 10:05 AM

The funny thing is...i'm a bigger guy (6'0, 245) i don't think i'm terribly attractive, and the girls i have dated have been as my guy friends put it "fucking hot". Slender atheletic types...*shrug* maybe i should be on a sitcom.....

Midnight_Son · 08-18-2005, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bettaa

The funny thing is...i'm a bigger guy (6'0, 245) i don't think i'm terribly attractive, and the girls i have dated have been as my guy friends put it "fucking hot". Slender atheletic types...*shrug* maybe i should be on a sitcom.....

Same here, (6'2, 250) I think that men need to realise that woman arent solely interested in a "beefcake" if you've got the right personality, you can go head to head with any guy out there.

raeanna74 · 08-18-2005, 11:02 AM

I've noticed this for a while. I rarely watch sitcoms. If I do it's sometimes Darma and Greg or Will and Grace. Both 'guys' are not the fat, lazy, stupid ones portrayed elseware. I don't mind the heavier guys but I'm not attracted in the least to lazy ones.

meembo · 08-18-2005, 01:38 PM

I think the less you watch TV and the other media that TELLS you what attractiveness is, the more you start to discover it for yourself.

Himbo · 08-18-2005, 02:07 PM

The way people are portrayed in the media (especially sitcoms) is terrible.

The women are usually fairly good looking, whiny and portrayed as smarter than their husbands.

Men are over weight slobs, insenstive, portrayed as dumber than their wives and even sometimes dumber than their own children.

I can't watch a lot of t.v. because of this.

Himbo

P.S.

I just shudder to think if you brought down a new race of people from another planet and only let them observe prime time sitcoms like "King of Queens", "Yes, Dear", "Everybody loves Raymond" and "My Wife and Kids" what do you think there assessment of our culture would be?

Blackthorn · 08-18-2005, 04:35 PM

This is pretty funny. A female co-worked and I discussed this one long night about two years ago in Wilmington and According to Jim was the show that got us started. That and the King of Queens. We couldn't figure out how the super sized guys were with very attractive women but then hey -- I chalked that up as a strike in my favor even though I'm not even close to chunky I've got the face that was made for radio.

One of these days the super model of my dreams *cough cough -mal what are you doing this weekend?* will walk into my life.

It's TV people... it's not supposed to be real life.

Rodney · 08-18-2005, 05:09 PM

Clowns are almost always fat, and I think it'd be fair to say that the leading man in most sitcoms is a clown -- somebody who interacts with the world in loony and immature ways. Roseanne could be fat, because she was the clown on her show. Of course I've known some screamingly funny thin guys, but on TV, "fat man" is a visual cue for "funny." It's okay for them to be fat. Nobody ever pressures them to diet.

TV wives are almost always thin and somewhat sexy, in sitcoms or otherwise. That's just what people expect, I guess: I suppose the networks think that at least some men are going to get a crush on any particular good looking woman on any particular show, which might bump up the ratings a trifle. So, the more good-looking women, the better. And if they get fat, they get gone.

In movies, you get a similar mismatch: the aged leading man and the sexy young heroine. Guys like Robert Redford, Kevin Costner, Sean Connery and Harrison Ford are in or near the Social Security Zone, yet any movie they manage to land usually pairs them with some hot 20-something. Again, it's for the guys in the audience. But it isn't usually reality.

In real life, I've known a couple of well-fleshed guys who settled down with gorgeous women. These guys were self-assured, good talkers, and fun to be with. When push comes to shove, such qualities are more important than looks alone.

analog · 08-18-2005, 07:28 PM

It's sad to say, but it's a nationwide psychological stereotype- and the ratings don't lie.

As much as we'd all like to say otherwise, "people" in general (the habitually tv-watching people) prefer their women more on the slender-but-with-boobs side, and their men to look like they do. Men like seeing a hefty guy with a hot girl, because it gives them hope that they, too, can land a hottie, despite their physical appearance, as long as they are a good person.

As far as women go, all the advertisers have to worry about is making sure the leading woman is strong, doesn't take shit from her "man", and gets in some good zingers, and the ratings tell them women are happy with that. They don't give a shit (according to the numbers) what the guy or girl looks like almost at all, as long as they're not grotesque.

It's not "you and I", it's "everyone" and advertising numbers.

And speaking of the "pendulum", keep in mind that "fat", not overweight or chunky, but FAT used to be considered as the societal "hottie". It meant wealth, sophistication, intelligence. Today, the societal norm of "hottie" is more around the slender, athletic build. I happen to love a woman who is voluptuous, more what you all in this thread would refer to as "real". Also keep in mind that opinion is here in the states... it doesn't apply everywhere, universally.

Well, you know what, slender girls are real, too. Few people can help that society's overall opinion is that a more slender build is more attrative- that's just public opinion.

jorgelito · 08-18-2005, 07:47 PM

It's probably due to the fact that most writers are male...

People project... tv & movies often reflect what the small, select, homogenous group of creative and their corporate bosses think.... imo..

ngdawg · 08-18-2005, 08:02 PM

Fred and Wilma, Barney and Betty, now the characters on Family Guy... Let's not forget the Simpsons.To some extent, even Cosby was guilty of it-that wife wasn't even old enough to have the kids portrayed on that show and work her way through lawschool, but that was the premise.
The men are out of shape dolts getting into scrapes that the wives have to suffer through and/or bail them out of. It makes for good comedy most times, even if the basic premise is one note.
I do think it'd be nice if it was a 'plain' wife with a knock-out of a husband, but knowing how things usually turn, he'd still be a dolt.....

shesus · 08-18-2005, 08:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ngdawg

To some extent, even Cosby was guilty of it-that wife wasn't even old enough to have the kids portrayed on that show and work her way through lawschool, but that was the premise.

NG, what the Cosby Show wasn't based on reality.

I'm going to have to go back to therapy now, and rethink my life goal.

CSflim · 08-18-2005, 11:16 PM

I agree. This is terrible sexism altogether and it must stop. Why are men constantly portrayed in such a negative light by the media. Think of all the self-esteem issues. They like to make out that all men are ugly, overweight and most importantly of all....they are invariably brain dead idiots.
What kind of society do we live in where such relentless....etc.

scout · 08-19-2005, 02:42 AM

Look around and you will notice that for a slight majority of couples after 30 the men are a little more on the hefty side from all the good cookin' and the ladies are a little more on the petite side. In some geographical areas the ladies consider it an honor their men are a little on the hefty side and they take pride in the fact he's well fed. They take it as a compliment of their cooking. I also think some ladies intentionally fatten up their men to insure some other sweet little thang don't look twice hahaha. I think in some aspects these sitcoms accurately reflect the American society. After all the only difference between men and boys is the price of the toys !! {wink wink....}

sashime76 · 08-19-2005, 03:35 AM

I finally found the answer that has eluded me for over 10 year - why my ex really left me. I'm about the same height as her current hubby but I'm 150 lbs Vs "Bob" @ 190 lbs plus.

ngdawg · 08-19-2005, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ohh_shesus

NG, what the Cosby Show wasn't based on reality.

I'm going to have to go back to therapy now, and rethink my life goal.

Eh, save your money.....everyone knows it wasn't, but to hear Bill Cosby tell it, the show was more realistic at that time than all other sitcoms....yea right...

mystmarimatt · 08-19-2005, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by analog

And speaking of the "pendulum", keep in mind that "fat", not overweight or chunky, but FAT used to be considered as the societal "hottie". It meant wealth, sophistication, intelligence. Today, the societal norm of "hottie" is more around the slender, athletic build. I happen to love a woman who is voluptuous, more what you all in this thread would refer to as "real". Also keep in mind that opinion is here in the states... it doesn't apply everywhere, universally.

Amen, brother.

That's why I particularly like "Will and Grace." While on the outside, it appears to be another rendition of 'Pretty People with Problems,' it actually presents us with imagery contrary to those we see in "fat man, skinny wife" shows.

Will and Jack are both well-kempt, attractive gay men. and while not all gay men are careful about their appearance, the vast majority of my experience with gay guys is of that.

The stronger part of this argument comes from Karen and Grace, however. Grace, while attractive, isn't mind-numbingly 'hot,' and they show easily identifies things about her they can poke fun of; most notably, and most ant-establishment? Her small boobs. Why on earth is she on TV if her tits aren't at least 36C? Karen, on the other hand, revels in her boob size, but that doesn't exclude the fact that while I do find Karen mind-numbingly hot, it's precisely because while she may have big breasts, she does not have a 16 inch waist. She's gorgeous, and hot, in the very classic way Analog spoke of.

In closing? Less clowns, more Karens

canuckguy · 08-19-2005, 09:42 AM

i think women will date the chubby guys as most times the chubby guys are the guys who like to have fun, good personalities, where as the skinny or workout type guys are too busy trying to impress and not be themselves. just my opinion. its wrong but its mine.

btw this is no means to stereotype inshape dudes as being "ego's" or something. just my opinion. please don't flame me. me 6' 190lbs.

analog · 08-19-2005, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brian1975

i think women will date the chubby guys as most times the chubby guys are the guys who like to have fun, good personalities, where as the skinny or workout type guys are too busy trying to impress and not be themselves. just my opinion. its wrong but its mine.

Your honesty in your opinion is good, brian1975, and helps round-out the overall tenor of the post.

As bad as it sounds, and as stereotypical as the whole "fat people are jolly" (or just that overweight people, even those slightly overweight, have a good attitude/personality) thing is, there is some thread of truth in it. I have heard from many girls, over a span of many years, that they perfer guys with a little extra on them because they're more grounded. They realize they're not "perfect", if there is such a physical description, and it gives them a different outlook on themselves and their bodies. As it happens, most of these girls then consider that body type to be "perfect", so that is an even bigger confidence-booster. All 3 of the real girlfriends i've ever had have told me that they loved my body... and i'm a stocky guy with a large frame, at my thinnest... at my heaviest, i have a little bit of a belly.

Knowing that the whole image a person tries to portray works for both females AND males, with regard to media influence, it seems perfectly natural for a girl OR a guy to be attracted to someone who doesn't "fit the mold" of what the media says is attractive. They know that person will be (much more likely to be) more solidly down to earth, and not as shallow or egotistical as others might be, even if others are only a little. I, myself, don't tend to prefer the slender, "athletic" type for women, I like a woman in good proportion. Not overweight, just a normal-sized woman. The media-portrayed "ideal" of the slender, athletic type doesn't really stand out for me. I like wrapping my arms around a woman a bit more substantial than that.Not overweight, just no0t tiny.

Note: Not that there's anything wrong with small girls, been there before as well.

08-18-2005, 09:37 AM	#2 (permalink)
shesus Fancy Location: Chicago	But then there's Roseanne and Dan Connors. They were both hefty people... I hate the steroetypes presented by the media. Wome have to be skinny, in-shape, and flawless while the guys can be proud of a beer gut and being out of shape. /me will wait to watch tv when the pendulum swings and real women are portrayed on tv __________________ Whatever did happen to your soul? I heard you sold it Choose Heaven for the weather and Hell for the company

08-18-2005, 09:54 AM	#3 (permalink)
ophelia783 Insane Location: West Virginia	I agree with ohh_shesus; I find it incredible how bigger men are portrayed with small women, and are considered by many to be sexy. Bigger women are usually the quirky best friend, who can never find love and who's always eating. Men are usually harassed for finding bigger girls attractive (some of my exes have been). __________________ ~~ He with a sharp tongue slits his own throat ~~

08-18-2005, 10:01 AM	#4 (permalink)
joofoo Just A Guy Location: Kansas City, Missouri	I have to agree the shows mentioned bother me on some level. Being that my wife and I are on the 'chubby side'. I personally don't watch any of those shows, but not for that reason, I just don't like them all that much. __________________ - joofoo

08-18-2005, 11:02 AM	#7 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	I've noticed this for a while. I rarely watch sitcoms. If I do it's sometimes Darma and Greg or Will and Grace. Both 'guys' are not the fat, lazy, stupid ones portrayed elseware. I don't mind the heavier guys but I'm not attracted in the least to lazy ones. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

08-18-2005, 01:38 PM	#8 (permalink)
meembo Junkie Location: Connecticut	I think the less you watch TV and the other media that TELLS you what attractiveness is, the more you start to discover it for yourself. __________________ less I say, smarter I am Last edited by meembo; 08-18-2005 at 03:16 PM..

08-18-2005, 10:05 AM	#5 (permalink)
bettaa Tilted Location: In my room upstairs in my parent's house :-(	The funny thing is...i'm a bigger guy (6'0, 245) i don't think i'm terribly attractive, and the girls i have dated have been as my guy friends put it "fucking hot". Slender atheletic types...shrug maybe i should be on a sitcom.....

08-18-2005, 02:07 PM	#9 (permalink)
Himbo Tilted Location: Canada	The way people are portrayed in the media (especially sitcoms) is terrible. The women are usually fairly good looking, whiny and portrayed as smarter than their husbands. Men are over weight slobs, insenstive, portrayed as dumber than their wives and even sometimes dumber than their own children. I can't watch a lot of t.v. because of this. Himbo P.S. I just shudder to think if you brought down a new race of people from another planet and only let them observe prime time sitcoms like "King of Queens", "Yes, Dear", "Everybody loves Raymond" and "My Wife and Kids" what do you think there assessment of our culture would be?

08-18-2005, 04:35 PM	#10 (permalink)
Blackthorn Beware the Mad Irish Location: Wish I was on the N17...	This is pretty funny. A female co-worked and I discussed this one long night about two years ago in Wilmington and According to Jim was the show that got us started. That and the King of Queens. We couldn't figure out how the super sized guys were with very attractive women but then hey -- I chalked that up as a strike in my favor even though I'm not even close to chunky I've got the face that was made for radio. One of these days the super model of my dreams cough cough -mal what are you doing this weekend? will walk into my life. It's TV people... it's not supposed to be real life. __________________ What are you willing to give up in order to get what you want?

08-18-2005, 05:09 PM	#11 (permalink)
Rodney Observant Ruminant Location: Rich Wannabe Hippie Town	Clowns are almost always fat, and I think it'd be fair to say that the leading man in most sitcoms is a clown -- somebody who interacts with the world in loony and immature ways. Roseanne could be fat, because she was the clown on her show. Of course I've known some screamingly funny thin guys, but on TV, "fat man" is a visual cue for "funny." It's okay for them to be fat. Nobody ever pressures them to diet. TV wives are almost always thin and somewhat sexy, in sitcoms or otherwise. That's just what people expect, I guess: I suppose the networks think that at least some men are going to get a crush on any particular good looking woman on any particular show, which might bump up the ratings a trifle. So, the more good-looking women, the better. And if they get fat, they get gone. In movies, you get a similar mismatch: the aged leading man and the sexy young heroine. Guys like Robert Redford, Kevin Costner, Sean Connery and Harrison Ford are in or near the Social Security Zone, yet any movie they manage to land usually pairs them with some hot 20-something. Again, it's for the guys in the audience. But it isn't usually reality. In real life, I've known a couple of well-fleshed guys who settled down with gorgeous women. These guys were self-assured, good talkers, and fun to be with. When push comes to shove, such qualities are more important than looks alone.

08-18-2005, 07:28 PM	#12 (permalink)
analog Banned	It's sad to say, but it's a nationwide psychological stereotype- and the ratings don't lie. As much as we'd all like to say otherwise, "people" in general (the habitually tv-watching people) prefer their women more on the slender-but-with-boobs side, and their men to look like they do. Men like seeing a hefty guy with a hot girl, because it gives them hope that they, too, can land a hottie, despite their physical appearance, as long as they are a good person. As far as women go, all the advertisers have to worry about is making sure the leading woman is strong, doesn't take shit from her "man", and gets in some good zingers, and the ratings tell them women are happy with that. They don't give a shit (according to the numbers) what the guy or girl looks like almost at all, as long as they're not grotesque. It's not "you and I", it's "everyone" and advertising numbers. And speaking of the "pendulum", keep in mind that "fat", not overweight or chunky, but FAT used to be considered as the societal "hottie". It meant wealth, sophistication, intelligence. Today, the societal norm of "hottie" is more around the slender, athletic build. I happen to love a woman who is voluptuous, more what you all in this thread would refer to as "real". Also keep in mind that opinion is here in the states... it doesn't apply everywhere, universally. Well, you know what, slender girls are real, too. Few people can help that society's overall opinion is that a more slender build is more attrative- that's just public opinion.

08-18-2005, 07:47 PM	#13 (permalink)
jorgelito All important elusive independent swing voter... Location: People's Republic of KKKalifornia	It's probably due to the fact that most writers are male... People project... tv & movies often reflect what the small, select, homogenous group of creative and their corporate bosses think.... imo.. __________________ "The race is not always to the swift, nor battle to the strong, but to the one that endures to the end." "Demand more from yourself, more than anyone else could ever ask!" - My recruiter

08-18-2005, 08:02 PM	#14 (permalink)
ngdawg peekaboo Location: on the back, bitch	Fred and Wilma, Barney and Betty, now the characters on Family Guy... Let's not forget the Simpsons.To some extent, even Cosby was guilty of it-that wife wasn't even old enough to have the kids portrayed on that show and work her way through lawschool, but that was the premise. The men are out of shape dolts getting into scrapes that the wives have to suffer through and/or bail them out of. It makes for good comedy most times, even if the basic premise is one note. I do think it'd be nice if it was a 'plain' wife with a knock-out of a husband, but knowing how things usually turn, he'd still be a dolt..... __________________ Don't blame me. I didn't vote for either of'em. Last edited by ngdawg; 08-19-2005 at 07:02 AM.. Reason: I used the same phrase twice!??!?!

08-18-2005, 11:16 PM	#16 (permalink)
CSflim Sky Piercer Location: Ireland	I agree. This is terrible sexism altogether and it must stop. Why are men constantly portrayed in such a negative light by the media. Think of all the self-esteem issues. They like to make out that all men are ugly, overweight and most importantly of all....they are invariably brain dead idiots. What kind of society do we live in where such relentless....etc. __________________

08-19-2005, 02:42 AM	#17 (permalink)
scout Psycho	Look around and you will notice that for a slight majority of couples after 30 the men are a little more on the hefty side from all the good cookin' and the ladies are a little more on the petite side. In some geographical areas the ladies consider it an honor their men are a little on the hefty side and they take pride in the fact he's well fed. They take it as a compliment of their cooking. I also think some ladies intentionally fatten up their men to insure some other sweet little thang don't look twice hahaha. I think in some aspects these sitcoms accurately reflect the American society. After all the only difference between men and boys is the price of the toys !! {wink wink....}

08-19-2005, 03:35 AM	#18 (permalink)
sashime76 Addict Location: Hoosier State	I finally found the answer that has eluded me for over 10 year - why my ex really left me. I'm about the same height as her current hubby but I'm 150 lbs Vs "Bob" @ 190 lbs plus.

08-19-2005, 09:42 AM	#21 (permalink)
canuckguy I read your emails. Location: earth	i think women will date the chubby guys as most times the chubby guys are the guys who like to have fun, good personalities, where as the skinny or workout type guys are too busy trying to impress and not be themselves. just my opinion. its wrong but its mine. btw this is no means to stereotype inshape dudes as being "ego's" or something. just my opinion. please don't flame me. me 6' 190lbs.