LunarEclipse

Here is my question: In the big picture, are some people better then other people and can people really help who they are or have become and is it a big ego to actually think you are better then/superior to others?

If you want to read what led to this question:
I had a situation at work where I was charged w/ sexual harassment. Without going into too much detail I was on face book and sent a half nude picture of myself to a contract employee (another female) -- I have lost some weight and been working out and wanted to show off I guess. I know, stupid, but let's move on. I work in an office with 3 other ladies (1 is a female attorney) and a male attorney. I am single, fairly attractive, no kids and basically living free and easy.

In any event this was used as an excuse to try to squash me. In the rush to put me in my place, even if it was sexual harassment and not some made up bullshit, it was not handled correctly. My boss, the male attorney, is semi-retired and was on vacation at the time (how convenient!). Things are resolved. Not exactly to my liking but that's not my issue now.

I am having a hard time moving past this. I know people can be petty and mean and small but when I am confronted with it it is unbelievable that people are actually that way.

I do not like conflict but I did stick up for myself in an appropriate way.

I want to think I'm better then they are, which would give me great satisfaction, but there is a part of me that says, no, you're not better then they are, that deep down we are all the same and that we should not compare ourselves to others. One should be humble, Blah blah blah.

Thoughts please.

LunarEclipse.

__________________
"Know thyself?" If I knew myself, I'd run away. ~
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Hektore

To this day, I'm not even sure what being a 'better person' than someone else really means.

As best I can tell every person has their particular set of baggage that they carry around and any attempt to quantify which is more or less important, by some external (non-existent) standard that you think you're ascribing to, provides more information about you than other person.

My honest opinion is that what you're feeling is some sort of hardwired ego preservation circuit in the brain. Imagine how you would feel about your life if you actually thought you were a shitty person, probably not good for contribution to the gene pool.

__________________
The advantage law is the best law in rugby, because it lets you ignore all the others for the good of the game.

EventHorizon

yes, some people are better than others. although rare, there are happy folk who do good things for their family and for their community without harming others or having bad intentions while being super smart and incredibly athletic and competitive but nice at the same time, in my experience, they're mostly mormons (the mainstream ones, not the whackos). there exist a few outliers too, but mostly just mormons

__________________
Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

dlish

every person's a good person. Why, their eulogy mentioned it!

Even rapists, muderers, and psychopaths are good people when it comes time to prepare that final speech. Thats all that it comes down to right? How people remember you once you're gone.

what i seem to be missing is trying to understand why you seem to think that you are better than these people. You even admitted that what you did was wrong, why not man up and move on?

Learn from your experience and move on instead of getting caught up with the demons of your own ego.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

EventHorizon

^ that gave me a pretty good chuckle

its a pity that people arent remembered by their entire live, just the good things. i think if people had unbearably honest eulogies that outlined every homeless person they saved, and every old lady they ran over, people would act so much differently knowing that the short amount of time they would have to establish a reputation would be so important when it came to their eternal memory.

__________________
Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

WhoaitsZ

Hmm. Every human has the potential to be a good person. however, we all tend to have our brains wired differently and it may be much more difficult for some than others.

Then you have people who have been abused or just in general been treated like shit. It must be harder for them but not unattainable.

I believe that we all should have equal rights over all. I'm no better than anyone because I have SMA and no one is better than me because they do not. Yet when you think of people like Gandhi, Desmond Tutu or Martin Luther King, Jr. you have a clear picture of some people who went well beyond their obligations of being a human being. They are better than most.

As for your situation I hope you do okay but that's one... umm. dumb thing to do. Best luck to you either way.

LunarEclipse

I don't think I'm better, I guess I just wouldn't have acted the same. But you are right in that "would I rather be right or would I rather be happy" - I would rather be happy.

---------- Post added at 03:23 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:00 PM ----------

I think you're right. We are not blank slates when we "come into this world" - whatever that means.

Thanks for feed back.

LunarEclipse

__________________
"Know thyself?" If I knew myself, I'd run away. ~
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Ourcrazymodern?

I'm a creep. The people who recognize that piss me off, & vice versa, so, YES. Feeling the same doesn't damn any of us, unlike feeling different has.

__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

skizziks

first off, i'd have to see the picture of you half naked to really understand what is going on, so if you could just forward it to me....

yes, some people are better than others. and those people are better than others. and it goes all the way around to the first group, like an mc escher stairwell.

in the big picture, it doesn't matter, because we all end up dead which pretty much equalizes everything out.

Lindy

Big egos maybe, but I don't see much "big picture" here. This is not Hitler vs. Ghandi. It's a squabble in a small law firm.

It was your own admitted lapse in judgement that brought this situation about. You put the firm at risk of a harassment suit. They probably had to react to cover their own asses. Absent that, how would you be judging these people?


If you want to move on, do so. Don't give this incident (and their reaction or overreaction to it) permanent free rent in your head. Move on, and seek your "great satisfaction" in another venue.

Lindy

Plan9

I totally love the dump-the-clutch flow of this thread's OP.

General Discussion:

People are not equal. Some are better than others. Some lives are worth more to society as a whole. It's the whole trite "beautiful and unique snowflake" speech from your favorite social dystopia flick. If everybody is special, nobody is. So let us be realistic: Some people are just garbage.

I believe we are what we do.

To get all philosophical: We are both the raw materials and shaping the produces the final product. The raw materials can be lacking if the shaping is superior. The raw materials can be superb but if they are poorly shaped the final product is... yeah, garbage. Not a lot to debate here in my mind.

OP Specific:

That was stupid. Don't send pictures of your tits and ass (or whatever) to people who didn't ask to see what you look like under your professional attire.

Accept that you were a total retard and move on. Next time... post the pictures on Reddit's GoneWild or TFP's Tilted Exhibition or whatever other venue you prefer. If you want someone to pump up your ego about your weight loss efforts, do it anonymously. It makes look like less like a vain douchebag.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

bagatelle

I think we are not smart to think, other people are nicer. It's stupid to give anyone ammunition and think they wouldn't use it.

Egos are far too important.

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Plan9

Or, ya know, any detail... like the one that might explain why you felt it necessary to do what you did. Totally missing the motivation part of your story.

"So, I fucked my buddy's wife... ANYWAY... now he won't invite me over to his Superbowl party. What gives? I thought he was better than that."

Uh...

...

BONUS:

Example: Completely Unwarranted Shot of my Sweaty Chest for Unsuspecting Thread-Goers

...AWESOME PICTURE...

You didn't ask for it... but what do you all think? Pretty awesome, huh? Yeah, I thought so.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

The_Jazz

Pass the eye bleach, please.

****

Actually, I pretty much agree with 9er. No one is special. Period. There are occassions where individuals do deserve special treatment, but there is no one who's special all the time.

And yeah, WTH were you thinking with that picture?

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

dlish

someone read me cynthetics signature again. thats all that matters really.

there's way too much nipple in here. what do you say we smack a NSFW tag on this one?

9er tried editing out the hand and blonde hair out of the pic, but that would have been at the expense of the nipple. at least we know which one's more important here.

__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Plan9

I love it when a plan comes together.

I also love the Tag(s) for this post.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

snowy

Hot.

__________________
If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

bagatelle

wow, nice teeth, Plan.

__________________

Martian

Do I see a surgical scar, or is my phone's crappy display playing tricks on me?

Also, since when does fucking up entitle one to feelings of superiority?

__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame

Cimarron29414

At least the prepubescent chest hairs match the prepubescent beard.

OP, all I can say is that I think you made a mistake and your ego is damaged because there ended up being consequences for the mistake. Think of work as a bunch of heads floating through the air. Never discuss anything below the neck. That's pretty much the safest way to avoid the consequences that smacked your tight, little ass. Heh, we aren't at work. :P

You aren't really having a hard time finding people to send nudie pics to in order to boost your self-esteem, are you? Instead, we have 9er hijacking your thread with his moobs in order to boost his. I demand you turn this thread back into what it was intended.

---------- Post added at 11:47 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:45 AM ----------

Yeah, those are hair transplant scars.

__________________
Gives a man a halo, does mead.

"Here lies The_Jazz: Killed by an ambitious, sparkly, pink butterfly."

filtherton

Plan9 has the least fuckable tits ever.

Also, I'd just like to point out that the fact that everyone is unique or special does in no way reduce the meaning of their uniqueness or specialness. To think otherwise is equivalent to believing that there is nothing unique about any whole numbers because all whole numbers are unique.

Everyone is special. Some folks just happen to get the short end of the special stick.

Plan9

Filtherton, you're clearly middle class whitey... as only middle class whitey would push some drivel like that.

You're confusing "special" with "different." And you can't apply math to this problem anyway, college guy.

6 doesn't think it is better than 7. But a lot of people walk around acting like they're "special." Uproarious.

What am I babbling about, you say? Entitlement, ego, being a prick. The real difference between those two.

This is more a case of the glass being half empty, half full... fuck it; the glass is too big for what it is holding.

...

Don't hate 'cuz my tits are perkier than yours. They're special.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

filtherton

You're more of a middle class whitey than I am. I won't be middle class until I get a job whose title doesn't begin with the word "grad". And special and different do kind of mean the same thing.

I'm just saying. Everyone is a snowflake, a special little snowflake. Most of the time, that specialness doesn't amount to much. That doesn't make it not special. Somewhere out there there is someone who could be correctly called the Tiger Woods of stamp collecting. That isn't the kind of specialness that would allow a person to get away with sending unsolicited nudie pics to your coworker (that requires more of a Brett Favre kind of specialness), but it's still kind of special.

I think your tits are special, even though they aren't especially notable for their size and areola breadth.

This is for your specialtits.

Cimarron29414

That's my son's favorite song. He says, "Daddy, I like Katy Pearwy." I say, "Daddy does too, son, daddy does too."

__________________
Gives a man a halo, does mead.

"Here lies The_Jazz: Killed by an ambitious, sparkly, pink butterfly."

Plan9

Funny that "special" is also used to describe the mentally retarded.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

filtherton

And the special forces!

WhoaitsZ

am i retarded? i'm looking for a pic. i see nothing.


i are teh confuzzlled

---------- Post added at 03:48 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:44 PM ----------

also. i agree with plan9. no one is special. special people are either dead heroes or mentally challenged.

EventHorizon

So are you arguing that everyone has a special "talent" at which they are the absolute, hands down, bomb-diggety?

my response is Astronauts. they could probably out do most snowflakes at whatever makes them snowflakes. Astronauts (i'm referring to the ones that weren't so psycho as to drive across country in diapers to find ex-bfs) are about as close to human perfection as it gets and i would be willing to bet dollars against dimes that they can out perform 19 out of 20 people at whatever activity the John Doe chooses. are people inclined to enhance whatever they're talented at? sure, but there's no way there are 6 billion Tiger Woods at 6 billion different activities

__________________
Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

KirStang

But all snowflakes melt when peed upon.

__________________

filtherton

I'm saying that everyone is unique and that makes them special, but that there aren't necessarily any significant ramifications of this uniqueness.

Ourcrazymodern?

__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

Zeraph

I don't think everyone is special. Just because we are unique, doesn't make us special. That's just some leftover bullshit of the american dream that got shoved down our throats.

Strange Famous

I dont want to come over as harsh, but at the end of the day if you send a half naked picture of yourself to a female co-worker, whatever the intention behind it was... I think you have to hold your hands up and take your medicine.

If you kept your job out of the situation I would say you've done well and dont really have a right to complain

_

As for the question... some people are smarter than others, some nicer, some better looking, some stronger, some better equipped to deal with the emotional weather... but I do believe that we are all basically the same insofar that we are all WORTH the same. (with a few exceptions - beasts and monsters in human forms, Jack the Ripper for example... but luckily these types are pretty rare)

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

filtherton

My daughter likes it too. She belts it out at the top of her lungs.


As for unique vs special: this argument is pointless if you folks can't acknowledge that there is a difference between being special and being special with significance. There is nothing special about being special if one is speaking of being special in a general sense. Everyone is special, and that makes everyone special. The fact that everyone is special doesn't make no one special, it just means that the diversity present in humanity is large enough to ensure that there isn't very much overlap between two distinct individuals. Every snowflake is special simply because there are none like it. The fact that that doesn't give you a boner doesn't mean it isn't true. I certainly don't go around catching snowflakes and drooling over how special they are because the specialness inherent in snowflakes isn't interesting.

Do you want to feel special? Shuffle a deck of 52 playing cards 7-8 times. Then hold it in your hand. Congratulations. It is incredibly likely that you are the only person who has ever held a deck of cards with the cards in that order and you may be the last person to ever do it too. That's special. Not necessarily significant, but special nonetheless.

If you mofos want to say that not everyone is special, you have to be more specific about the scope of that specialness, otherwise, you don't make any sense. In the the general sense, everyone is special. No amount of too-cool-for-school posturing will change this fact. On the other hand, if your point is that not everyone can be Michael Jordan, well, I agree.

ring

Yeah.

I admire Filtherton's especial strikings, very much.

Ourcrazymodern?

God, I wish it had been a more generalized question!

__________________
BE JUST AND FEAR NOT

The_Jazz

Why?











seewhatididthere?

__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

stellabella1978

Our society has stressed "no person is better than any other, just different" PC way of thinking. However, I believe that while everyone has the potential to be better than others in some individual way, very few people actually live up to that potential.

ring

“Each man is good in His sight. It is not necessary for eagles to be crows.”
- Sitting Bull

Plan9

"You can't polish a turd."
- Shitting Bull

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."