vicdaman

harsh. but she did cheat on him twice apparently.

what do you all think?

Cynthetiq

what do you think?

__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

TheCrimsonGhost

Damn... that's rough, what a build up. With that said, she deserved every embarrassing moment. If my babies mama was caught in the corner of a bar cheating I would do the same thing givin the opportunity.

BITCH BE TRIPPIN'!

Willravel

Cheating on someone is absolutely cruel and inhuman, but this reaction is childish and unnecessary. I don't feel at all like this was appropriate, funny, or just. Assuming it's real, which is questionable.

Jetée

Unless the girlfriend was listening in at the time, (or if both parties were present in the studio, which is less likely) he didn't dissolve their relationship in anything other than his mind. He'll need to do it again eventually so she gets what's going on, or he can go on avoiding her for no apparent reason, thinking his on-air message should have reached everyone, including his girl.

It's the "if a tree falls in a forest, yet no one is around..." principle.

You (the hypothetical breaker-upper) need to communicate such a thing to your partner, not to the disinterested audience that gets a few minutes to whoop it up, and then forget about it tomorrow.

__________________
As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world (that is the myth of the Atomic Age) as in being able to remake ourselves.

—Mohandas K. Gandhi

KirStang

Pathetic. Instead of handling such a issue like two adults would (confrontation at home), he decides to make a spectacle out of it.

In all likelihood though...part of me thinks it was staged.

TheCrimsonGhost

Did you even listen to it? It's fairly obvious she knows what is going on. I will detail it for you, since you obviously didn't listen: Radio hosts call chick claiming to be wanting to talk to her about what her ideal marriage proprosal would be, going on about public proposals and such, they then tell her they have a surprise for her and her boyfriend comes on, she starts freaking out with the omg's thinking he is going to propose, and he tells her to get her shit out cause she is caught, she had been seen in a bar recently with another guy making out in the corner, she starts crying and hangs up after saying she can't believe what kind of people THEY are, instead of just shooting herself for being a cheater. I have no sympathy for cheaters, she deserved it, childish reaction or not.

Ice|Burn

Clearly you didn't listen to the clip. They radio show called her and the no ex boyfriend told her live on the air.


Was it harsh to do this publicly like that? Sure. Was it harsh that she cheated on him? Sure. Was it entertaining to listen to? You bet!

__________________
"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours." -Stephen F. Roberts

IF PWNED > OWNED and PWNED=PWNAGE and OWN<PWN but PWN<PWNED and OWNAGE>OWN then what does OWNAGE+PWN equal?

Jetée

Thank you. Without the repetition of the obvious, I did not listen to it.

I responded based on what you detailed for us (I have a habit of not clicking any youtube clips longer than 3 min.) It's still doesn't change my initial reply's message (it just negates the opening scenario of UNLESS). I'll listen to it now, I suppose, if you think it will further the discussion.

- - -

It's not ground-breaking, nor really too embarassing. The girl got caught cheating, (presumably) and was called out on it. The boyfriend, on the other hand, is severly lacking in tact, but when such a situation arises, what place does tactfulness have when your partner's been slumming?

__________________
As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world (that is the myth of the Atomic Age) as in being able to remake ourselves.

—Mohandas K. Gandhi

Plan9

When my next partner cheats on me with her exboyfriend, I'll be ready with a stunt like this.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

ObieX

I found that clip refreshing and uplifting. I am really happy for this dude.

With these kinds of radio shows its prolly fake, but it still makes me happy.

__________________
We Must Dissent.

flat5

"Cheating on someone is absolutely cruel and inhuman"

inhuman? That's funny.

Maybe I don't understand the word.

Also, I did not listen to the recording.

bagatelle

Very entertaining clip... small-minded people end up becoming radio hosts. It's some sort of talent (or illness) to pick and use people when they are most vulnerable - for the sake of drama.

But the guy actually sounds like he might regret this later. He threw five years being together down in the toilet just to humiliate the girlfriend some more.

__________________

ObieX

Sounds to me like it was already in the toilet. All he did was flush away the crap.

__________________
We Must Dissent.

zenda

Well, I think it was an excellent piece of witch-burning. The timing, the build-up of expectation and the dynamic reversal were well done. Kudos for the way the host caught on to how fear of things being in public was her prime emotional driver ... he made a special point to get her full assent and confirmation as to that before applying the 'sting in the tail'.

And that bit at the end, where the host double-checked that the guy was OK before terminating that section of the show. More Kudos ... that painted a solid layer of .. of Dignity over the proceedings. It was a ritual of concern, or retribution, and redemption. Not for her, or the child, but for the narrowest possible application of principle.

But before this self-consciously 'observant hindsight', I hung on to every word. SHE was sooooo WRONG and He was sooooo RIGHT. And 'Gotcha!' and Monkey Poop! etc etc. I went into damned crowd mentality, and she'd've been charred to a cinder before I found an ounce of "WTF" or "Woah - hang on there!"

Oops

Punk.of.Ages

If this little stunt is any indicator of how the dude acted during the relationship, there's probably a reason he was cheated on and she's probably the winner in this situation...

There's definitely something "disgusting" going on in this clip, but the cheating girlfriend isn't the one doing it.

__________________
"The fact is that censorship always defeats its own purpose, for it creates, in the end, the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion..." - Henry Steel Commager

"Punk rock music is great music played by really bad, drunk musicians." -Fat Mike

SirLance

I have to agree. My ex-wife cheated on me, and I took the high road. Never regretted it. I think if I had done otherwise, I would have regretted it, and it would have come back to haunt me. Living well is the best revenge, and I have...

My mom used to say "Never air your dirty laundry in public." This is exactly the sort of thing she was talking about.

__________________
DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes.

Baraka_Guru

Lame.

Then again, public humiliation was never cool. But I guess it's better than a stoning. I guess that these guys have that going for them....

__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Strange Famous

If hurting someone that he used to care about makes this guy feel good/happy, its not surprising his girlfriend cheats on him... he sounds like a disgusting human being. She is better off without a cruel bully like this.

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

Plan9

Oops.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

bagatelle

That's how they cleverly make it look like. They focus on the mistake, the woman did in the relationship, making it look like large enough, more clearly pointing out this gives them justification to lie and lead on the woman.

We don't know though, how these five years was for the couple. Apparently not good enough, since the woman was tempted to spend her time with another man.

The guy himself probably wouldn't have taken this to the radio, if he had done something similar himself, but did he give signs of not being that interested: maybe he just was negligent about their relationship, not working on it, thinking this will do.

Surely, the woman feels guilt, she knows she did wrong to her boyfriend. Marriages and proposals should be outlawed, they make people crazy, imagining popping that one question in romantic setting will make things somehow different. They weren't obviously levelling enough.

The guy might regret later, when he gets over his hurt feelings. They had to deal with the issue. In some cultures (or some other era) the man might have given a beating to the other guy courting his fiance, but the modern wimps make someone else deal with it on air! How brave...

My friend in youth was engaged to a man and they had also been together for five years. The bf caught her in the act with their mutual friend, drinking was involved. The bf would have accepted this and continued the relationship, but the girl wanted to leave, because she thought, the whole situation was not fair.

25 years later she has not yet settled down, has teenage daughter of one relationship, that lasted longer than numerous others - and she did have plenty. The guy started dating another, married quite soon, since the new gf got pregnant, but years after he was not yet happy and kept calling to my friend, told her he often still wakes up calling her name.

Maybe they shouldn't have stayed together either, but this is to show, how differently some men take things.

__________________

Jetée

Condensing your quotable into a more manageable sum-up: [though I'll hit upon some of your other hypotheticals, too]
beating (mentally- / verbally-abusive castigation) her (the cheating gf) in private might have been more "couth". Not as entertaining a scenario, whatever the place that has in a society like ours, (it's pretty high up there, I think, however woesome) but just discussing matters internally helps resolve situations much more quickly / cleanly than involving those to which the situation pertains not at all (e.g. a radio audience, the parents, the fuzz, etc.) musses it up further than where one could have gone with a possible 5-min sorry-soliloquy and/or justified hysterical ranting. I'll admit: I'd much rather get bitched at in private, or taken out behind the woodshed with a 2x4 (it's happened before) than have to put it on display and let it be called "a show". It's not really a matter if one desrves it or not, but if you see it coming, it's best to minimize the potential damages.

Therefore, what this guy did, if not staged, and it was meant to a lasting, immediate impact in real-life situations, while perhaps highly-entertaining to the masses of yokels like me, is in the "wrong" column of how to act like a decent human being. Granted, he'd most likely be issued a reprieve if all the wrong in the relationship with his girl was perpetrated by the other party, he was the everlasting victim there, and he just took that last broken straw in such a derailed coupling, and decided to turn it back on the villianous woman he's "wasted" the past five years of his life with... it's all real speculative, though.

I, myself, have been in similar situations [when one is raving mad] where I kept myself on an even keel, despite knowing full-well I could have the justification to go berserk and "defend myself". It doesn't feel right to cage one's emotions in all at once when you just feel that need to defend your honour. I have put on a defense in other situations where I let my anger get to me, and despite my regrettable actions, as well as knowing those same emotions & actions were "within reason" for some, they certainly weren't within my own. I'm a noted pacifist, with an extreme prejudice towards revenge. I love hating stuff and everyone, but it does consume me to hold onto such nonsense, that I much rather go on feeling bad about not being able to do anything about to you, than having to hate myself later on for hating everyone else.

It's really hard to let the babbling go, no?

"You get as much as you give, in return" --(if I haven't botched the saying)

I don't know if there is cosmic karmic justice, and I know that wouldn't stop some from just being their regular jerkiness selves all the same... but, to other half of the invisible majority, yeah, by some accounts, they try to live by that instilled moral code of conduct. I try. And fail. Then, I try to get ahold of some better semblance of that again. And learn from what works, and what doesn't.


Long story short: As much "epic" ratings gold! as the jilted boyfriend did by waving his broken heart on-air, what good did he really achieve? I'll give him ended his admitted horrible relationship with quite a flair. He hurt the cheating girlfriend, probably, via the widespread "gasp!" embarassment factor, but he didn't save himself from any more hurt. There's no real right/wrong answer for what the guy "supposedly" achieved in the end. Clarity? Emancipation? A headache of civil suit for libel? Who knows - we can't even confirm if this clip is real or not, so what's the use (and what's the supposed radio station / airdate of this clip)?


One thing I'll leave you with: Yeah, I know; you can stuff your sorry's in a sack, partner.

__________________
As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world (that is the myth of the Atomic Age) as in being able to remake ourselves.

—Mohandas K. Gandhi

zenda

That changed the direction of a railway track in my mind.

So, as I look at my past ways of responding and notice how my future ways may become different,
Thank you.

Strange Famous

Being hurst is not IN ITSELF a justification for hurting someone back.

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

KirStang

*Bravo.*

Very cogently stated.

I really think she just got cold feet.

Sometimes, in relationships, the larger picture might trump the kneejerk reaction to yell, "she cheated!" and burn all bridges.

Plan9

Say what? Really now... what would be the justification then? I'm curious.

__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Strange Famous

The main one is self defence.

When you hurt someone not to defend yourself but purely for revenge you become no better than them and sometimes worse.

If this girl was cheating on the guy he could have just left her, and preserved both of their dignities.

To run her through this whole thing of making her think he was going to propose, just so he could instead humiliate and hurt her is cruel and sadistic.

She may have been a cheat and her behaviour could rightly be called thoughtless and selfish - but not deliberately cruel as the guy was, and her mistakes do not give the guy some kind of license to hurt her emotionally as much as he can and its all ok. At least not in my opinion.

_

And before people accuse me of just being a white knight, I would take the same view if a woman did this to a man.

(although this is very unlikely to happen in real life as no woman would be so brutal, and I am not at all convinced that this incident was not all an act)

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas

EventHorizon

cheers

__________________
Does Marcellus Wallace have the appearance of a female canine? Then for what reason did you attempt to copulate with him as if he were a female canine?

Quote:

Originally Posted by canuckguy Pretty simple really, do your own thing as long as it does not fuck with anyone's enjoyment of life.

Strange Famous

You know what I will do the next time a girlfriend of mine cheats on me?

I'd end the relationship without recriminations, shouting, arguing or airing my dirting washing in public, tell her that trust has broken down and there isnt any basis to carry on together in life, and do my best to move on, find someone else, hope that this time its the right one...

I genuinely can see no reason to want "revenge". Hurting someone who I used care about and presumably havent just stopped caring about at the drop of the hat wouldnt make me feel any better at all.

__________________
"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."

The Gospel of Thomas