Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > General Discussion


View Poll Results: How far would you go with a person whose morals so oppose yours?
That would pretty much be it, I wouldn't stand for it. 35 50.00%
I would have sex with this person, but not date. I can set aside morals for a good lay. 11 15.71%
I would date this person, maybe it's not so bad or they will subdue a little with time. 10 14.29%
It wouldn't make any difference to me- they're not MY opinions, they're theirs. 14 20.00%
Voters: 70. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 01-26-2006, 01:47 PM   #41 (permalink)
Tilted Cat Head
 
Cynthetiq's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Manhattan, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by docbungle
Well, you certainly took a leap there. You come to conclusions in a very hop, skip and jump sort of way. We'll call it "selective gleaming."

Archie Bunker, who was a fictional character, was written to be a bigot. The writers did a very convincing job. He was very "bigotesque." For you to assume that I view him as otherwise is to assume that my viewpoint is skewed from reality because of my statement on homosexuality.

People commonly jump to assumptions such as yours, and I think that is the primary problem. It is the same thing the girl in the OP is being accused of.

Look, for the record, I find homosexuality to be disgusting. It actually grosses me out. In it, I can see no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Having said that, I'll say this: One of my closest friends recently let me know that he is gay. Was I shocked? No. Suprised? Yes. Do I still find homosexuality disgusting? Yes. Am I dissapointed in my friend? Of course not. Am I disgusted by him? Of course not. The fact that he has sexual relations with men disgusts me, but HE doesn't disgust me. He is not an act, he is a person. And I love him like a brother. Who he fucks will never change that. And me being disgusted by homosexuality sure as heck doesn't make me an Archie Bunker.



Two posters have posted the meaning of bigotry according to their repective dictionaries. I don't have "My Own" private meaning of the word stashed away anywhere. It's definition is printed above your post for everyone to read.

So you tell me, how is being disgusted - or, for that matter, voicing disgust - amount to bigotry?
Wasn't selective, before you edited your post, it stated clearly and solely that the definition was describing and applied to political parties.

I didn't accuse you of being a bigot. I never stated your thoughts were bigoted.

I inquired about your definition and applied your rebuttal of someone's definition to Archie Bunker, not a skip, not a hop, not a jump, simple application of logic.
__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.
Cynthetiq is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 01:51 PM   #42 (permalink)
Pissing in the cornflakes
 
Ustwo's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetpea
Also: if getting phsycially disgusted over something and expressing it to others doesn't fit your defintion of bigotry? then what does?
There have been times I've been physically disgusted by things I've seen. When I was dissecting out a vein under the lungs on a cadaver in anatomy class on a man who died of lung cancer and I had to cut through the spongy calcified lung cancer tissue in order to reach it, I was close to retching. I don't think anyone here would fault me for it, it was reflexive.

When I see two males in a sexual act I get a like visceral reaction. Its not violently ill, like I was close to feeling with the dissection, but its a gut feeling of EWWW.

I am 'tolerant' of homosexuality and homosexuals, I am friends with and have patients who are, but the defining act of being a male homosexual makes me cringe when I see it.

Being tolerant doesn't mean you have to like something.
__________________
Agents of the enemies who hold office in our own government, who attempt to eliminate our "freedoms" and our "right to know" are posting among us, I fear.....on this very forum. - host

Obama - Know a Man by the friends he keeps.
Ustwo is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 02:25 PM   #43 (permalink)
It's all downhill from here
 
docbungle's Avatar
 
Location: Denver
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
Wasn't selective, before you edited your post, it stated clearly and solely that the definition was describing and applied to political parties.

I didn't accuse you of being a bigot. I never stated your thoughts were bigoted.

I inquired about your definition and applied your rebuttal of someone's definition to Archie Bunker, not a skip, not a hop, not a jump, simple application of logic.

Look, I don't want to start a stupid argument over semantics, but it seemed to me as if you were saying something akin to:

I find homosexuality disgusting = I don't think Archie Bunker was a bigot.

Pray tell.

Or, put another way: because someone sees homosexuality as disgusting, they are unable to define bigotry, because they probably are one.

My political reference was an example of what bigotry is and what it isn't.

I don't see any simple, applied logic in your Archie Bunker analogy. But we just seem to be miscommunicating, and I'll leave it at that.
__________________
Bad Luck City
docbungle is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 02:27 PM   #44 (permalink)
Banned
 
Seems like there's some "hate the practice, but not the person doing it" going on here, which is always very interesting.

Also, I added to my opening post: I guess I didn't get it across, but it was an all-night thing. She went on and on for the rest of the time we were out. I won't provide details because this thread isn't about this incident, but trust me- this was gay-hating bigotry.

The purpose of this thread, and I'm really glad so many are latching onto it, is exploring the line between your personal comforts and those of a potential SO.

For another example- there was a girl I worked with at another job whom I never dated, but I had sex with her once. She was a racist. She wasn't blatantly open about it, didn't treat anyone badly to their face, but very strong in convictions if it came up in conversation, or once the person in question had left and it was just us "whities". I could have sex with her, because her racism was not so bad that it made me want to walk away from her entirely- mainly because she internalized it. Had she been the least bit vocal or outwardly prejudiced, i'd likely not have even spoken to her. But hell no, i wouldn't date her.

Sex is sex. Most people will look past a LOT just for sex. That's why the option is in the voting, and that's part of the consideration.

This whole thing is about any kind of conflicting moralities or specific ideals- pro-life/choice, for/against guns, maybe YOU are a bigot and your SO isn't, anything. I've met (note: met, not continued to hang out with after having said this to me) guys that have told me they wouldn't date a girl who'd date or fuck outside her race. To them, their moral code is correct, and they hold their potential SO's to their moral code- and anything contradictory might be a deal-breaker.

Last edited by analog; 01-26-2006 at 02:31 PM..
analog is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 02:34 PM   #45 (permalink)
It's all downhill from here
 
docbungle's Avatar
 
Location: Denver
Quote:
Originally Posted by analog
Seems like there's some "hate the practice, but not the person doing it" going on here, which is always very interesting.

Also, I added to my opening post: I guess I didn't get it across, but it was an all-night thing. She went on and on for the rest of the time we were out. I won't provide details because this thread isn't about this incident, but trust me- this was gay-hating bigotry.

The purpose of this thread, and I'm really glad so many are latching onto it, is exploring the line between your personal comforts and those of a potential SO.

For another example- there was a girl I worked with at another job whom I never dated, but I had sex with her once. She was a racist. She wasn't blatantly open about it, didn't treat anyone badly to their face, but very strong in convictions if it came up in conversation, or once the person in question had left and it was just us "whities". I could have sex with her, because her racism was not so bad that it made me want to walk away from her entirely- mainly because she internalized it. Had she been the least bit vocal or outwardly prejudiced, i'd likely not have even spoken to her. But hell no, i wouldn't date her.

Sex is sex. Most people will look past a LOT just for sex. That's why the option is in the voting, and that's part of the consideration.

This whole thing is about any kind of conflicting moralities or specific ideals- pro-life/choice, for/against guns, maybe YOU are a bigot and your SO isn't, anything. I've met (note: met, not continued to hang out with after having said this to me) guys that have told me they wouldn't date a girl who'd date outside her race. To them, their moral code is correct, and they hold their potential SO's to their moral code- and anything contradictory might be a deal-breaker.
Ah. Well, I would grow tired of someone very quickly if all they did was complain about things (whether it be going off on an anti-gay tirade or anything else) whether I agree with them or not. Big difference between not approving of something and refusing to shut up about it.
__________________
Bad Luck City
docbungle is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 06:00 PM   #46 (permalink)
I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot!
 
raeanna74's Avatar
 
Location: Upper Michigan
The only thing I think I would be immovable on is a lack kindness towards others.

As for bigotry. I have yet to meet someone who was completely unbiased towards other people with regards to race, culture, and lifestyle. I may be wrong but I hope to see that some day.

Hubby and I actually do tell joke or cut at other races or cutures occaisionally. Usually they come up when we see someone who is behaving in the negative way that often occurs within a certain culture or race or even age. (ie. really old people who drive really slowly and forget to turn off their turn signals - and don't tell me it's not common very old person behavior.)

The lack of kindness can go across the board to all people. In this case this woman seemed to have a lack of kindness in that she tortured her friends with her negative outlook all night long. I wonder if her problem wasn't partly with the show of public affection gay or straight. Though it does sound like the lifestyle was part of it. I wouldn't pursue anything with a person like that who can't get over something so minor. It didn't matter whether they were gay, or black, or real young, or much older. She was a complainer.
__________________
"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.
raeanna74 is offline  
Old 01-26-2006, 08:22 PM   #47 (permalink)
Tilted Cat Head
 
Cynthetiq's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Manhattan, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by docbungle
Look, I don't want to start a stupid argument over semantics, but it seemed to me as if you were saying something akin to:

I find homosexuality disgusting = I don't think Archie Bunker was a bigot.

Pray tell.

Or, put another way: because someone sees homosexuality as disgusting, they are unable to define bigotry, because they probably are one.

My political reference was an example of what bigotry is and what it isn't.

I don't see any simple, applied logic in your Archie Bunker analogy. But we just seem to be miscommunicating, and I'll leave it at that.
bigot defintion = political parties descrition = Archie Bunker not bigot

Not at all, it's miscommunicating which is why I was asking for clarification, and thank you for your clarification.
__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.
Cynthetiq is offline  
Old 01-27-2006, 06:10 AM   #48 (permalink)
Knight of the Old Republic
 
Lasereth's Avatar
 
Location: Winston-Salem, NC
Who cares what the definition of bigotry is. Obviously the girl had a problem with gay people and analog can either get over it or it's not gonna work. If me and my GF had morality conflicts like that we'd simply never work. I say go for a one night stand if you can but don't expect a happy relationship with someone that close minded.
__________________
"A Darwinian attacks his theory, seeking to find flaws. An ID believer defends his theory, seeking to conceal flaws." -Roger Ebert
Lasereth is offline  
Old 01-27-2006, 11:34 AM   #49 (permalink)
Banned
 
just to re-state, before the info gets twisted: I wasn't with her, she was "with" my friend for the evening.
analog is offline  
Old 01-28-2006, 05:29 PM   #50 (permalink)
32 flavors and then some
 
Gilda's Avatar
 
Location: Out on a wire.
Well, there certainly would be little point in my dating someone who found homosexuality disgusting, but I get the point of the OP.

I have, surprisingly, heard on more than one occasion a lesbian expressing disgust for male homosexuality, and there's no way I would date a woman who made a point of expressing such a point repeatedly, both because of the bigotry and because of the hypocrisy.

Any equivilent view that a date felt the need to repeatedly express would meet the same result, for example disgust for a white man kissing an Asian woman or a black man with a white woman, to name two pairings I've heard disdain for. I wouldn't want to be with a woman whose morality I found offensive.

Gilda
__________________
I'm against ending blackness. I believe that everyone has a right to be black, it's a choice, and I support that.

~Steven Colbert
Gilda is offline  
Old 01-29-2006, 04:02 PM   #51 (permalink)
Registered User
 
I don't care what her morals are - but if someone does something annoying - they're being annoying. Going on and on about gays, or saving the whales, or being a vegetarian, or a democrat, or a republican, or who decide to turn every conversation into an argument about guns, or racism, or Americans, or all of those (often admirable convictions) is just a pain in the arse after the 1000th time.

Some people become so focused and hung up on a very limited set of topics, that they can't seem to get over it and live a life of balance and normality -it's almost as if they don't want to.

I don't care what anyone believe in, but I'm not keen on fanatics - they usually have a very parochial (and normally very dull) view on life that I find irritating.
nezmot is offline  
 

Tags
compatibility, morals


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 04:59 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360