The affair - what the hell am I doing?
The quick stats:
<ul>
<li>Me: pushing 40 very hard, married 13 years, lonely for 5, 2 kids, no strong religious affiliations other than I don't like to hurt other people.</li>
<li>Her: friends wife, gently nudging 40, married 12 years, 2 kids.</li>
<li>Us: friends for several years, madly professing love, madly making love, talking about a future together.</li>
<li>Timeframe: 3 weeks since first kiss.</li>
</ul>
Am I freaking nuts? I've wanted out of my own marriage for a while. I thought kids would help but I was wrong. Don't get me wrong, my kids are the world to me but I'm so tired of being alone in a marriage. Counseling didn't work well for us other than it produced our kids. It's just so damn easy to drift.
Friends wife says that her husband (a.k.a. my friend) would never do counseling. She feels that their marriage is just going nowhere. She claims that there isn't anything left but is scared to get a divorce.
There is a part of us that wants to get caught. It would be so much faster and in some respects easier if we did.
I am freaking nuts. She's going to go back to her husband. I'm going to lose my wife, my friend, and a woman who I can't stop thinking about.
Other than the obvious - "You're freaking nuts" - any advice?
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