This thread bugged me a little so I searched La Petit Moi's previous posts, to see if I could find anything that might give you (and us) a little insight. ...
here are some lines La Petite Moi wrote:
"I have changed some. I used to have MAJOR problems with myself. I would self-mutilate in any form possible. I still get depressed and have unhappy bad thoughts, but my Lover helps me through my bad times...in memory, or by my side. =)"
and:
"I get flashes of death in my head...like, shooting myself in the back of the throat, or slitting my arm open. The only person that knows when I do usually is my lover. I'm sure he wants them to stop. I do too. But I always feel it. However, I'm still young, so it's probably just emotions.
My suicidal thoughts go a few years back. I got them a lot when I had eating disorders. I didn't think I had the strength or the will to live. I took too many pills, made myself sick for a few days. I cut my arms open in a weak attempt to get help, though I just refused any that came to me. I finally looked for a gun, held it to my head, and hoped it was loaded as I pulled the trigger. Thank god it wasn't, because now I have the most beautiful person in my life. =)"
and:
"Cutting was a form of expression for me, and a way of coping with problems. .."
and I had to dig, but this thread just about says it all:
Thread Link
Where she writes:
Quote:
Yeah, so this has been plaguing me for awhile. I hope someone can help me, but if not, it's okay.
The only way to say it is that whenever I do anything with my Lover, I feel sick afterwards. Sometimes that's to be expected [especially for one of the things we do], but sometimes we'll kiss and I'll get a horrible stomachache afterwards.
Anyway, if anyone can help, I would appreciate it..
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and
Quote:
Well, symptoms = naseous feeling in my stomache, headaches.
My relationship = Good, very close and very committed. We've been together for six months.
Childhood = not all that good. I was abused until I was around 15 years old.
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So, I guess I was right about her being abused. My several people close to me were sexually abused as children (though not by family) and they had problems that almost exactly parallel those she described above.
The single biggest piece of advice I can give you is to restrain yourself. If she is curling up into a ball after sex, or during, etc. you need to stop doing whatever it is that is causing her to do that. She probably isn't ready yet.
Edit: Oh, one more thing. She mentioned that she was abused until she was 15. In another post (probably the reason she was banned), La Petite Moi said that she was 17. If she was abused for 15 out of her 17 years of life, she hasn't really had much time to get over her issues, or to at least learn to live with them.
I doubt she will be willing to go see a psychologist, but it is ok to ask her.
If she is unwilling to go see one, you can contact one yourself and see if they can give you any constructive advice.