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The key is romance rather than sex.
Candles, good food, massage... all of these things may lead to sex but don't let her feel like you are doing this for sex. Ensure that she feels the evening is all about her and only her.
Personally I don't buy my SO lingerie. Lingerie is a gift for you. If you are going for a gift it all depends on where you are at in your relationship.
If you are newly together it shouldn't be to expensive and it should come from the heart (when I first started dating my SO I made her a "Box of Love" -- essentially it was a very nice antique, heart-shaped box that I filled with paper slips with Love written on them as well as a poem about her -- perhaps it is cheesy but it completely blew her away).
If you are much further along, jewelery is a good bet. Nothing too flash (I'm not talking diamonds here) just something nice (I've bought a few rings -- amethyst with markisite, red ambers, something I knew was to her taste -- NOTE: this means you have to pay attention to what she likes!!!).
There is also the getting of something very dear to her. I gave my SO a china doll that she'd had her eye on for sometime. It was in the window of a jewelery store at the bus stop near her apartment. She pointed it out to me a couple of times. I bought it for her. When she saw it was gone from the window she was devestated. When she got it for her birthday she was extatic.
Know what she likes and do these things for her...
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"My hands are on fire. Hands are on fire. Ain't got no more time for all you charlatans and liars."
- Old Man Luedecke
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