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Post holiday humor
THE MONTH AFTER CHRISTMAS
'Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse!
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
at the holiday parties, had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales, there arose such a number.
Then I walked to the store, less a walk, more a lumber!
I remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared,
the gravies and sauces and meats nicely rared.
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
and the way that I never said "no thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husbands old shirt,
and prepared once again to do battle with dirt-
I said to myself, as only I can,
"you can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dips,
get rid of the fruitcake and crackers and chips.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick,
I want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or cornbread or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore!
But- isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
Author unknown
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In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus
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