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She's always going to resent it if you don't make great efforts to make the holiday special for her.
We all have stuff to be bitter about. Don't you have anything that gives you joy in life? Try to focus on that. The "I'm a bitter man" paints you into a corner and is going to make your life miserable. Believe me ... I fight it all the time. But then I change focus to the good stuff and it helps.
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