Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Girlfriend advice. A philosophical question

-Ever- · 12-21-2003, 12:24 PM

So this is a very broad question. Even if I gave you guys details I don't think I could get a solid, true answer because life is life and just a series of actions and consequences. So here it goes. Prepare for generalizations:

What kind of girl do you think is a man's best, longterm partner (read: wife, girlfriend, mate for life....)? I will give two examples, not by the type of girl, but the type of relationship I have with the two types.

A) An easy going, linear, not up-and-down, always moving foreward, generally unpassionate (good sex but there is minimal friction in the relationship...), unexciting, similar types of friends, explorative, spiritual, not generall excited to spend every minute with, not the girlfriend that I like to party with, *the "me" of girls* type of girl

or

B) An up-and-down, exciting, passionate, caring, gives much attention, amazing adventurous sex, many similar interests (humor, movies, *not music...*), adventurous, type that I love to party with, love spending every minute with?

If you're actually interested in giving advice, just do some digging in what I said and try to make some conclusions. Keep in mind that I'm only 21 but I'm pretty settled down for my age (from many years of early partying!) and am really into what I do and I definitely know what I like in life. I'm just torn inbetween these two girls. I've been with the first one for almost three years. Went to London for three months and spent the entire time with the second type while on a break from the first type. The second type is going to be a long distant relationship if we hold onto it (Seeing eachother about twice a month...) The first type.
I keep on refering to them as "types" because I'm trying to be philisophical about this and am trying to make genearalizations about which will compliment my life better in that they make me strive to be the person that I want to be while I do the same for them...
Thanks guys. Fee
l free to ask questions if you have any
-T

(edit) Also: another important thing is that I'm pretty into fetishes, not just in sexual activities in the bedroom but also within a lifestyle to an extent. The second type is much quicker to enjoy getting dressed up in latex, going to fetish events, and generally is the more *curious little girl* type of the two. The first type is slowly getting wilder in bed, much at my controll which is fine, but I don't think will ever cross into actually enjoying dressing up. I can see this fetish carring out through my entire life as it has been pretty important for as long as I can remember. I'm worried that I will always be looking for the second type if I stick to the first one, something that really doesn't sound safe to have on my mind in the longer run...The only counter arguement to this is that I will some day need to settle down and stick to the less exciting one, because, as they say, life isn't about having fun.... So, do I calm down or keep on the edge and delve into the more exciting, lively of the two?

Also, now that you're this far, I'll give a little background on the two girls. Giving it might take away from the generalizations I was looking for, but you might want to know... A) is higher maintenance, a very hard worker, goes to fashion school in SF, works at designer clothing shop in sf, and is looking to be a pretty independant, self sufficient working gal. B) is less maintenance, looking to be an actress, is more rugged and down to get dirty, and I'd say less independant in the long run in that she doesn't seem to be working just to achieve self-sufficiency. I felt the need to include these because by calling A) spiritual I didn't want you to think she was a hippy because she's quite the obvious judging her dress and maintenance, and I didn't want you to think that B) is high-maintenance and not rugged just because she is looking to be an actress and all...

12-21-2003, 12:24 PM	#1 (permalink)
-Ever- Junkie Location: San Francisco	Girlfriend advice. A philosophical question So this is a very broad question. Even if I gave you guys details I don't think I could get a solid, true answer because life is life and just a series of actions and consequences. So here it goes. Prepare for generalizations: What kind of girl do you think is a man's best, longterm partner (read: wife, girlfriend, mate for life....)? I will give two examples, not by the type of girl, but the type of relationship I have with the two types. A) An easy going, linear, not up-and-down, always moving foreward, generally unpassionate (good sex but there is minimal friction in the relationship...), unexciting, similar types of friends, explorative, spiritual, not generall excited to spend every minute with, not the girlfriend that I like to party with, the "me" of girls type of girl or B) An up-and-down, exciting, passionate, caring, gives much attention, amazing adventurous sex, many similar interests (humor, movies, not music...), adventurous, type that I love to party with, love spending every minute with? If you're actually interested in giving advice, just do some digging in what I said and try to make some conclusions. Keep in mind that I'm only 21 but I'm pretty settled down for my age (from many years of early partying!) and am really into what I do and I definitely know what I like in life. I'm just torn inbetween these two girls. I've been with the first one for almost three years. Went to London for three months and spent the entire time with the second type while on a break from the first type. The second type is going to be a long distant relationship if we hold onto it (Seeing eachother about twice a month...) The first type. I keep on refering to them as "types" because I'm trying to be philisophical about this and am trying to make genearalizations about which will compliment my life better in that they make me strive to be the person that I want to be while I do the same for them... Thanks guys. Fee l free to ask questions if you have any -T (edit) Also: another important thing is that I'm pretty into fetishes, not just in sexual activities in the bedroom but also within a lifestyle to an extent. The second type is much quicker to enjoy getting dressed up in latex, going to fetish events, and generally is the more curious little girl type of the two. The first type is slowly getting wilder in bed, much at my controll which is fine, but I don't think will ever cross into actually enjoying dressing up. I can see this fetish carring out through my entire life as it has been pretty important for as long as I can remember. I'm worried that I will always be looking for the second type if I stick to the first one, something that really doesn't sound safe to have on my mind in the longer run...The only counter arguement to this is that I will some day need to settle down and stick to the less exciting one, because, as they say, life isn't about having fun.... So, do I calm down or keep on the edge and delve into the more exciting, lively of the two? Also, now that you're this far, I'll give a little background on the two girls. Giving it might take away from the generalizations I was looking for, but you might want to know... A) is higher maintenance, a very hard worker, goes to fashion school in SF, works at designer clothing shop in sf, and is looking to be a pretty independant, self sufficient working gal. B) is less maintenance, looking to be an actress, is more rugged and down to get dirty, and I'd say less independant in the long run in that she doesn't seem to be working just to achieve self-sufficiency. I felt the need to include these because by calling A) spiritual I didn't want you to think she was a hippy because she's quite the obvious judging her dress and maintenance, and I didn't want you to think that B) is high-maintenance and not rugged just because she is looking to be an actress and all... __________________ Embracing the goddess energy within yourselves will bring all of you to a new understanding and valuing of life. A vision that inspires you to live and love on planet Earth. Like a priceless jewel buried in dark layers of soil and stone, Earth radiates her brilliant beauty into the caverns of space and time. Perhaps you are aware of those who watch over your home And experience of this place to visit and play with reality. You are becoming aware of yourself as a gamemaster... --Acknowledge your weaknesses-- Last edited by -Ever-; 12-21-2003 at 01:02 PM..