A few years back I had a part time job in a petrol station.
For those that don't know, when you pick up a petrol pump, it comes up with a request on the till. The cashier has to look out at the person filling up, check they aren't doing anything stupid (!), and then authorise the request when they are happy. The customer can then fill up with fuel. Anyway..
The till starts beeping as usual. It's quite busy at this time and all other pumps (5 of them) are in use. I see a guy, having just got out of his expensive car, holding the pump and a lit cigarette in one hand, and chatting on a mobile on the other! "Does this guy have a suicide wish?"
My reaction was to stop all the other pumps, and fire up the tannoy: "I would like to apologise for the temporary stopping of all pumps. If the gentleman on pump 3 would put out his cigarette and switch his mobile phone off, I will then re-start the pumps". Everyone starts staring at the guy and he starts shouting abuse at the top of his voice, telling me to "turn the ******* pump on" and other choice phrases.
Everyone else seemed to be enjoying the show, and I simply said "Sir, you are causing a major fire hazard. If you will switch your phone off and put out your cigarette, I will start your pump. Until then, all pumps on this station will remain stopped". He then threw the pump on the floor and drove off loudly, tires screeching, still on his mobile. Everyone, including myself, all the customers in the shop, and all the people on the forecourt were laughing loudly as I re-started all the pumps...
Best laugh at work I've had!