First off I think sex and affection are two totally different things.
You can be affectionate to another person without having sex.
I understand where you are coming from with this question. I too feel
if my b/f is not/does not want to have sex with me he is unhappy. The
more I am with him though the more I understand how we interact with
each other and the way our moods affect us differently. If he is upset
or stressed I am less likely to want to have sex with him. That doesn't
mean I am unhappy with him or want things to change, it just means the
mood is not right. I don't know many women who want to have sex often
if it is a constant battle and cause for fights in a relationship.
I think it is normal to gauge your s/o's happiness on sex even if it is
not the way it should be. I do the same, it's just a double standard I
set on myself. Personally, I would not worry if your sex life is iffy
right now. A lack of genuine affection towards one another could be a
problem. Even when my b/f and I are at odds we always tell each other
how much we love the other and are close. I know I'm in real trouble
when he avoids me all together
!
I wouldn't worry if your sex life is decreased at the moment. Stress
along with many other normal, everyday things tend to do that. Just
make sure you are making an effort to communicate with your s/o... but
not pushing the subject.