monkeysugar

I totally agree. AIM, icq, etc are great for getting to know someone better, when you don't see them often, etc. If you are a relatively shy person like myself, it can provide a lot of "safe" opportunities to talk. When you talk in person, you'll actually have stuff to talk about. Personally I'd go for it. If you're confident enough, just ask her straight out if she has a boyfriend or not. Be it looking for a friendship or a relationship, here's an approach that has worked pretty well for me: through talking to her, you will find out things she is interested in. This is important, because if you are like me and are pursuing a possible relationship and not just a fun night of bumping uglies, you will need to show her that you are not just trying to get into her pants, but are in fact interested in her as a person.

If she mentions something that she likes, act on it. For example, my first date with my current girlfriend came along something like this. "I love Starbucks, but I haven't been in forever." Me: "What are you doing right now?" "Nothing" ME:"Would you like to go to Starbucks with me?" If nothing else, you're learning about what she is interested in, and made an effort to do something that she enjoys.

I suppose the best advice I can give you is not to think about it so much, if that is possible. Do what seems right, say what seems right, not what seems like the cool or right thing to say, and be yourself. And most importantly, have FUN!

I hope this was somewhat useful. I wish you the best of luck.