I appreciate your enthusiasm Gutter, it's very uplifting.
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Think about what you really want. There has got to be something! Go for it. You've got to make yourself get up and go. Find ONE THING you like and just go nuts with it...that'll give you something to wake up to.
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I've been working on this for months. At first I tried to focus on some of my past hobbies and passions. Golf being one of them. In high school and college I was one of the best in the region, but now days I can't make myself get out and play. And I don't know why, it's irritating. The make yourself get up and go is the hardest part. Believe me, I want to. Hell I'd like to try to play some amateur tournaments if possible. But for some reason I can't muster up the motivation, desire, or focus it takes to get to that point.
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DO NOT GO TO THE DOCTOR FOR DRUGS!!! That's a cop out! You don't need them! You can change everything, just start small.
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I've always had this philosophy myself. However, with several family members on mediaction for various forms of depression or anxiety, I'm starting to wonder if possibly there is a problem there that needs some medical attention. I've always felt like taking medication was for the weak, for those who couldn't pull their life together themselves. I'm starting to realize I was wrong.
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Don't dwell on trivial shit...if your late for work...don't sweat it, you work with your father right? Talk to him if you can, tell him what's up. If he is at all understanding, he'll be leniant. Don't worry about paying bills exactly on time! What do you think grace periods are for?!
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That's probably one of the things that keeps me going to work everyday. I don't want to disappoint my dad. It amazes me what he's accomplished over his lifetime. How someone can go from 0, bankruptcy, to owning a company that makes close to 1,000,000 a year. He's put blood, sweat, and tears into his job and I can only hope that I gain the determination and success he's been able to achieve.
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It sounds like your overwhelmed...try slacking with pride....if that makes any sense. Take it easy you know. You can get out of it, you don't have some crazy terminal disease, the cure is not that far away.
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I'd hate to 'slack with pride'
as you put it, because I'm afraid that would only make things worse. Besides working for my father, I don't rely on him or his money at all. I refuse to. If it's a dire emergency, like a serious illness or accident then yes, otherwise I want to fend for myself. I keep telling myself to stop being lazy, to get off my ass, and to dig up that motivation, although it's as if something physically is holding me back. It's hard to explain. I will find a way out, more than likely because of everyone's opinion on the matter here, it's just a matter of time. Perhaps the first step is buckling down and seeking some medical advise or treatment.