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I don't know if you've gone to see a doctor about the acid reflux, but that might be a good start. There are some great drugs now to deal with that kind of thing - my mom and my father-in-law both have issues and have been doing really well with the medications they're on.
Another thing you could do, and this is going to sound "woo-woo" but it worked for my mom and my sister, is to have your food sensitivities tested. You can do this a number of ways:
1. go to an allergy specialist
2. go to a kinesthesiologist (this is somewhat controversial and I'm a little skeptical, but this is what my mom and my sister did, and what they found out from the kinesthesiologist worked for them)
3. test things yourself by eliminating one thing for a week or two and seeing how your body reacts - e.g., eliminate dairy, or refined wheat, or tomatoes, or garlic, or whatever for two weeks and see if things get better. But do them one at at time so you can tell what's the culprit.
This can help with some of the symptoms of acid reflux. Do you have genuine acid reflux, or do you have a hiatal hernia? (You mentioned surgery...)
If the acid reflux is making sex uncomfortable you should try different positions that don't aggravate it. If it's just that it's a constant level of discomfort that makes you not want to have sex, then you should probably have it looked at till you find a treatment that works for you. Nobody should have to live with that kind of discomfort 95% of the time, and it can't be good for you, besides.
Good luck!
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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
- Anatole France
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