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it may seem a little trite, but you can take the girl off the stage, but you can never get the stage out of the girl. most girls who enjoy dancing also enjoy the attention that it provides to them. my first marriage was destroyed because my wife wasn't happy with what i was giving her so she went behind my back and did some awful things to get more attention.
now understand this. you two aren't married, but you're living together. if you ever swapped rings, it's more than likely you'll go through the whole motion, including all the vows. now they may seem a little forced and cold, but if you look behind the meaning, you'll see that they're there to promise your loved one that you'll be there, no matter what. "for richer or poorer" - that means that you guys may fall on lean times like you have been, but you still need to be there and be supportive of the other.
it seems like, from what you've conveyed, that she's done little more than put up with your period of "for poorer" - she rode through it, but it dosen't seem like she's being overly supportive of your problems. the fact that she's taking back to the stage instead of finding mnore conventional means of employment shows that she's not read to let go of the attention she once had... she lived a pretty high life as a stripper, and now that she's gotten a look at the more domestic, mundane life, she's decided she's not ready to settle down to that anymore.
you may be better off just letting this one go, or you may want to reassess your priorities; whether or not your hang up on her dancing is a problem that you need to deal with or not. think about your wants and needs and the wants and needs that she's expressed and figure out whether staying together is going to be good for both of you. if you don't see it being mutually beneficial, break it off while you are still on decent terms with her.
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My country is the world, and my religion is to do good.
- Thomas Paine
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